The Sunday Show – A funny thing happened to author D.G. Kaye

My guest today is Canadian memoir and nonfiction author and blogger D.G. Kaye (D.G.). It is clear that D.G delights both the women she writes for and I suspect the men who sneak a peek with her down to earth and often humorous look at life. There is also a serious side that comes across in D.G’s books and in her blog posts that strips back the layers that are formed in relationships. Those that are good for us and those that are harmful. I will take a closer look at her writing later in the introduction.

D.G was born and raised in Toronto where she still lives and writes about her own life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues. She began keeping a journal as she lived through a turbulent childhood which was lacking in emotional support from her narcissistic mother. This challenging start in life was the inspiration for her first book Conflicted Hearts.

Her second book also charts one of the most challenging times in a woman’s life. Those of us who have enjoyed that ‘time of life’ as it is often referred to seldom see the funny side in the hormonally driven changes in our body. However, D.G manages in Meno-What? A Memoir, to not only share her observations and wisdom about this natural phase in our lives, but to bring humour and tips for survival!

Her third and latest book was featured in the Five Star Treatment, Words We Carry, focuses around women’s self-esteem issues. Most of us tend to have our own unique way of putting ourselves down and D.G talks about how and why we do this and how she recognised and overcame her own issues.

Apart from her books, she has also written articles about life, her opinions on people and events as well as contributing poetry and health articles for a Canadian magazine. She is very interested in natural health care and remedies prompted by her own health issues and that of her family.

One of the very positive aspects of D.G’s writing is that it always leaves you feeling inspired and motivated to be more pro-active with your life in both health and relationship issues.

Here are a couple of quotes that sum up this attitude to life.

“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return; wouldn’t that just make the world right?”

And her favourite saying: “Live. Laugh. Love …and don’t forget to breathe!”

When D.G. is not writing, she’s reading. Her favourite genres of reading are: biographies, memoirs, writing and natural health. She loves to read about people who overcome adversity, victories and redemption and believes we have to keep learning–there is always room for improvement! She loves to cook, travel, and play poker hence her Twitter handle!

The Author

51c+jfFAgNL._UY250_

About the book

A Lifetime of guilt — What does it take to finally break free?

Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try to do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.

Burdened with constant worry for her father and the guilt caused by her mother’s narcissism, D.G. Kaye had a short childhood. When she moved away from home at age eighteen, she began to grow into herself, overcoming her lack of guidance and her insecurities. Her life experiences became her teachers, and she learned from the mistakes and choices she made along the way, plagued by the guilt she carried for her mother.

Conflicted Hearts is a heartfelt journey of self-discovery and acceptance, an exploration of the quest for solace from emotional guilt.

What a great find! December 19, 2013 By Karen B Format:Kindle Edition

Yesterday I happened to come across this book and I am so glad that I did. It made me laugh, it made me sad, it made me angry but most of all, it made me cheer for D.G. Kaye! She writes with candor and insight, passion and heart. It is an easy comfortable read, much like having a conversation and I couldn’t put the book down until the conversation was over. You can feel the little girl’s worry and confusion, the teenager’s guilt and angst, the sadness and the searching of the young woman and finally the strength of the adult. Ms. Kaye writes about the affects her mother’s actions has had on her entire life and the decisions she has made but she is never mean spirited about it and it makes you love her more.

It is a book that makes you think, reflect, understand and most of all it is a book that shows you that with the right attitude and beliefs, you can forgive and move forward. I loved it!

5148dy-kWHL._UY250_

“I have been a great critic of myself for most of my life, and I was darned good at it, deflating my own ego without the help of anyone else.”

What do our shopping habits, high-heeled shoes, and big hair have to do with how we perceive ourselves? Do the slights we endured when we were young affect how we choose our relationships now?

D.G. takes us on a journey, unlocking the hurts of the past by identifying situations that hindered her own self-esteem. Her anecdotes and confessions demonstrate how the hurtful events in our lives linger and set the tone for how we value our own self-worth.

Words We Carry is a raw, personal accounting of how the author overcame the demons of low self-esteem with the determination to learn to love herself.

5.0 out of 5.0 by Kindle Customer

D.G. Kaye uses all her feelings of empathy, compassion, and honesty to reveal the power of WORDS that hurt, destroy, and demean. Words that in most cases have been forced upon us, and we never forget their poignant sting or understand the devastating effects they have on our lives and our relationships. You create the reality that has been engrained in your mind whether it’s wrong, unfair, or just plain mean, spiteful, and filled with envy and jealousy. WE ARE THE “WORDS WE CARRY” THROUGH LIFE! Isn’t it time to delve back to the source to first recognize and then change your self-image, self-esteem, and self-worth?

WORDS start piling up at a very young age…long before we understand why such labels are placed upon us by inconsiderate, angry people, usually our families, who lash out at everyone around them in an attempt to make themselves feel better. Who gets hurt? Just about everyone, including themselves. But the delicate psyche of a child, who is born seeking only love and acceptance, is so susceptible to ridicule, negativity, verbal abuse, and degradation. It is rarely a child’s fault that they are bullied, laughed at, used between adults as weapons in grownup games, or called names that stick like glue.

Ms Kaye reaches back to her personal, traumatic early years to release the WORDS that practically destroyed a beautiful, giving, loving personality. In her easy, flowing writing style, where you feel like you’re communing with your best friend…sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes comedic, always strong and resourceful…you get the best she has to give to show how you too can rescript the WORDS that keep you downtrodden and afraid to ask for and receive what you deserve out of life.

Thank you D.G. for this heartfelt, soul-searching book to set us all free from the “Words We Carry” that only inflict pain and suffering. YOU TOO CAN FIGHT BACK AND WIN!

51IpQxBodML._UY250_

Meno-What? A Memoir
D.G. adds a touch of humor to a tale about a not-so-humorous time. While bidding farewell to her dearly departing estrogen, D.G. struggles to tame her raging hormones of fire, relentless dryness, flooding and droughts and other unflattering symptoms.
Join D.G. on her meno-journey to slay the dragons of menopause as she tries to hold on to her sanity, memory, hair, and so much more!

Loved it!!! July 21, 2014 By Annie Edmonds Format:Kindle Edition

Let me tell you that this beautiful woman has a way with words. And she will make you laugh as she describes what it’s like to go through menopause. Anyone that can make you laugh while going through menopause is alright in my book.

D.G Kaye writes about trying to keep her sanity while her hormones are raging. This is something most women can relate too. There’s memory loss, hot flashes, dry spells, and even the dreaded hair loss. She writes all this and so much more in a fun and informative way. This book is filled with lots of love and even more laughter.

D.G. tells you how to take life as it comes and she pulls no punches. She’s a Canuck from Canada that writes from the heart. If you know someone who’s just had a hysterectomy buy this book. In fact every woman reaching that menopause age needs a copy..

The Blogger

D.G writes about life and part of our life cycle is of course death. As we get older we begin to lose those close to us and grief is a very natural part of our existence. It becomes tragic when of course those that we lose are young and vital members of our family. Whatever the circumstances we all have our own way of dealing with the grief and D.G covers this particular issue very sympathetically but also in her usual practical manner.

http://dgkayewriter.com/waiting-stolen-hours/

You will also find excellent articles on divorce, anxiety, changes in our perception of the world including how we become less fearless with age and experience. I recommend that you head over and find out more for yourself.

Now time to meet D.G (Debby) in person and talk a little more in depth about some of her life experiences and also her writing.

71F8zMPwPML._UX250_

Thank you Debby for joining us today and perhaps we could start with the increasingly documented personality trait labelled Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It is only recently that this disorder has become better known as more and more people realise that at some point in their lives they have been subjected to its negative impact. Perhaps you could describe the sort of behaviour that a narcissist would exhibit?

Hello Sally and readers of this wonderful blog. Thank you so much for inviting me to this new series to share my stories here with so many other talented artists and writers.

A narcissist, in laymen’s terms, sees him/herself as the center of existence. They feel as though their appearance and/or words trump everyone else’s. In my mother’s case, she had created a false persona that she had convinced her own self that she was superior. It was her mission to be the most beautiful one in a room, and craved attention so that focus had to be on her at all times.

Everything she talked about was exaggerated to make sure she could captivate her audience with her stories of grandeur. Her wants and needs came first to anyone else’s, including her children’s. She’d go to any lengths to acquire whatever it was she seeked.

Now, some people like to tell lies and paint pretty pictures of themselves for attention, but a true narcissist, as in my mother’s case, actually believes her own stories because she lived in her own ego.

I learned through the years of studying her, that this was a disease, which commonly wasn’t recognized as such. In the last generation, I don’t believe it was prominently diagnosed.

Do we all have some elements of that behaviour and if so what triggers it becoming a full blown disorder?

I don’t believe we all have the elements of becoming a narcissist, but I do believe there can be circumstances or incidents one encounters in life that propel one to becoming narcissistic. I’m no licenced psychologist, but I have to believe it can also be linked to various (undiagnosed) mental disorders, such as depression, which becomes a catalyst to narcissism, used to overcome some troubling issues. I say this because I think that besides my mother’s strife to be the best in show, I sensed a sadness within her that she was trying to conceal, not just to everyone, but also to herself.

She medicated that inner sadness with booze, pills and gambling, intermittently. She came from a poor family, and in a Scarlett O’Hara sort of way, had used her beauty as a weapon to obtain materialistic things in life.

I don’t believe anyone is born a narcissist. I think that it is the situations one lives through, which have a propensity to steer them in that direction as a means to achieve a status to feel better about themselves; and no matter at who’s expense.

It is obvious, as in your case, that a child would feel powerless in that kind of relationship. But is also true that adults of narcissistic parents can still be under the influence of that negativity especially as the parents age. What would be your advice to someone facing that challenge?

I would have to say the statistics show that many adults are still held under the powers of a narcissistic parent. It’s a major feat to become freed from the power that parents hold over us, mainly from their use of guilt as a means to obtain what they demand.

I was petrified to say the word “no” to my mother, my whole life. I danced to her every whim, and there were plenty of them. Children’s psyches are delicate, and grow from what we know and are used to. If we’re obedient, and not defiant children being raised by a narcissist, the odds are we shall remain under their power for the rest of their lives unless we are lucky enough to take a stand to them. For me, it was always unsettling to be around my mother.

We have to find a way for ourselves to live comfortably and deal with that parent (in my case.) It is very unlikely that person will ever change because they don’t believe they are the one with the problem.

I complied with my mother’s demands all my life and it ate away at me like poison, I took her wraths and tantrums because I felt I had to obey. I was the child, no matter what age I was. It took me decades and barrels of courage to get over the feeling that she had entitlement to anything she demanded from me, as a daughter. With a lot of self-therapy and self-analysis, I tried to reason with her to no avail.

I had to learn the hard way that it wasn’t my job, or in my power to fix her. The sickness wouldn’t allow anything positive I had to offer her, register with her. In the end, it was my own self-sanity I had to save, and painfully after so much emotional torment, at 48 years old, I walked away,

Sometimes you have to learn when you can’t fix a broken soul who doesn’t think it needs repairing.

In the UK there are around 120,000 divorces a year which is one of the highest in the European Union. In the US I understand that is around the 2.5 million mark per year. Whatever the figure that is a huge number of men and women and of course millions of children who are faced with this life changing event. What do you believe are the key issues that partners find so difficult to overcome that leads to this very final dissolution of their relationship and family?

Many times people get married for the wrong reasons, varying from anything such as, for material gain, pregnancy, or just settling for a relationship in order not to be alone, just to name a few. Other times, it could be that people marry too young.

Experience shows us that as we grow older, our wants and likes change as we grow. Sometimes people drift into new directions, leaving a partner behind when they no longer share interests. Also, infidelity is a major cause of break-ups, and I believe the promiscuity begins when one isn’t receiving the shared interest, respect, attention or kindness from their partner. They crave acceptance and to be acknowledged or included as a partner in their marriage, and when they stop receiving, they become vulnerable when they meet someone who feeds that need.

What would be your advice to anyone in a relationship who is facing potentially serious issues about some of the communication points they should be discussing with their partners to help prevent a complete breakdown?

We have to communicate our thoughts and feelings to our partners. We have to open our ears and listen back when they express their feelings to us. We should be supporting their work and passions. This must become a two-way street of reciprocation.

If we feel we are giving our all, and we aren’t being paid any mind or consideration for our own thoughts and feelings, this is a good sign we are not in a loving, supportive relationship. This would be the time to seek some outside therapy to salvage a relationship, before it becomes time to sever it.

Back to your writing. What is your next major project and where are you in the process?

I am currently in revisions with my next book (very late with them I might add), about essays on life incidents. In this book, I recall some stories of past years, when life was different, and often simpler. And, of course, there are stories about how the times have changed, and my opinions about how I feel about it.

I’m also writing the sequel to my first book, Conflicted Hearts. I left my first book open to a finish, as my mother was still living at the time of publication. Since that time, she has passed, and I’ve had a lot more realizations and interviews with family members, delving deeper into my mother’s issues, which I didn’t feel was fair to get into while she was alive. I’m hoping to have that book finished and published by summer of 2016.

Now time for the central theme of the Sunday Show interview.. ‘A funny thing happened to me..’

What are the Odds?

I title this situation with the phrase I’ve countlessly repeated many times throughout my life because I’ve often encountered situations in life where the odds were slim of things happening.

Sometimes it wasn’t always a good situation, but in this instance, I lucked out with favourable odds.

When I was twenty-five, I took a leave of absence from my then position as an executive assistant to the general manager of a downtown hotel chain. I had a fantasy that I wanted to fulfil of travelling through the Greek islands. Part of that trip I rented villa on the island of Mykonos for six weeks.

I travelled alone, as I was fiercely independent and had no trouble meeting people and forging friendships.

While I was waiting for three days in Athens for my booked passage over to Mykonos, I had befriended some interesting people staying at my same hotel. One of these people was a lovely Dutch boy, a few years younger than I, who was backpacking through Europe. Another couple I befriended were from Australia, also backpacking and taking on work around Europe to sustain their travels. They were at the same hotel at the same time as I was, all treating themselves to a few days in a nice hotel instead of the usual youth hostels.

When we all parted to go our separate ways, I had given them my address in Mykonos, and invited them to drop by if they were on the island in the coming weeks, and I offered them a room to rent in the villa for a nominal fee. I thought it would be nice for them, and it would also give me some extra pocket money.

Only a few days had gone by in Mykonos, and I had broken my foot getting off a high step on a bus while going into town for some provisions. Now, that situation alone is a story, which you will find in my book Conflicted Hearts, but nonetheless, my foot was broken, and I wasn’t going to another island to have it casted. I saw a doctor who wrapped it tightly in a tensor bandage, gave me crutches, and told me to keep my leg elevated as much as possible. Walking on crutches on the broken cobblestone roads and struggling to get up the small mountain (and down) on the rickety path to the beach was a feat in itself.

 A few days had passed and as I struggled again to get to the beach, and find my rock where I elevated my foot, I laid down my things and began thinking that I should cut my vacation short because it was too hard for me to get around. I was sad and scared about my demise. Tears sprang from eyes in my feelings of defeat. And then moments later, I heard somebody shouting my name.

I was sure it was a call for someone else, as I had yet to make friends with anyone there, except for the jeweller in town who befriended me when I fell off the bus and helped me get to a doctor, then scared the crap out of me. (Again full story in my book.)

I quickly sat up to see where the far away voice was coming from, when I realized God had sent me an angel.

My little Dutch friend had come to visit. He stayed for two weeks. He was so kind and helpful. He prepared meals for me, took me to town and carried my things, and helped me up and down the hilly paths. We shared a great friendship for many years after through letters. And, of course, I never took a dime from him.

Could lightning strike twice? After my Dutch friend left, a mere one day later, the same miracle happened at the beach when my Aussie friends showed up looking for me. They stayed with me for two weeks.

Coincidence? Divine timing? Those who know me well know that I often preach that we meet people; sometimes for reasons, sometimes for a season.

Thank you so much Debby for providing such an important insight into one of the most corrosive relationships that we can find ourselves in and also the strategies that might help us overcome the challenges we face.   Love your story… Coincidence perhaps, but also down to how well liked you were by those you met that they wanted to see you again…

Buy Debby’s books and connect with her… Definitely a ‘must do’.

Links
Author page on – http://www.amazon.com/author/dgkaye7
Twitter – http://www.twitter.com/pokercubster
Blog – http://www.dgkayewriter.com
Facebook – http://www.facebook.com/dgkaye
Google – http://www.google.com/+DebbyDGKayeGies
About Me – www.about.me/d.g.kaye.writer

Thank you for stopping by and do please leave your comments and of course please feel free to share by reblogging or clicking on any of the social media buttons…

Next week John W. Howell author of My GRL… joining us from Texas.

Advertisements

72 thoughts on “The Sunday Show – A funny thing happened to author D.G. Kaye

  1. Pingback: The Sunday Show – A funny thing happened to author D.G. Kaye | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

  2. Thanks Sally and thanks Debby. Fascinating books and take on life. I think your insights into Narcissistic personality traits are very much on the money. Unfortunately, like with many personality disorders (all) they are very difficult to treat, and as you say, one of the problems is that the person don’t see it as a problem, or at least not their problem. Looking forward to discovering more about your work.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Olga. Thanks so much for reading and your feedback here. Narcissism is a complex disorder to understand and diagnose. Each individual’s case stems from their own life situations. Many people live with someone affected and may not even realize it. I made it a point to study my mother and learn for myself where her traits stemmed from, but I think it’s a truly difficult process to diagnose, for each case is so specific,

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Sally, thank you so very much for inviting me to your esteemed blog here and taking the time to put this interview together. It was a pleasure and an honour to be part of your show. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am a fellow Canuck. 🙂 Congratulations on your writing. 🙂

    I am also an ACON – an adult child of narcissism. My mother passed away many years ago and it was only after I got out of a marriage to a narcissist – and did a lot of thinking and writing on the subject – that I realized that her personality disorder had quite an impact on me and my siblings. “No contact” is completely necessary with them, even if it is your mom.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks so much Lynette for sharing your story. I am glad to know that writing has helped you as well to understand how much impact narcissism can have on the family members involved. Thanks for validating ‘no contact’, as it was very hard for me to do, but when it reached a point that staying in the relationship was eating away at me, it became a survival mode, I had no choice. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. A mother is the central person in a child’s life. I cannot imagine cannot imagine not being loved or cared for when the need is so great as a youngster. I have read Debby’s Conflicted Hearts but not those following. Despite her background and beginnings, she has grown into a beauty, outside as well as inside, and into a charming woman. A down-to-earth no-nonsense interview, I enjoyed very much. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Another great interview, Sally, and such a wonderful guest for this week’s show.

    I love Debby’s story about visiting the island the Mykonos. I have been there myself and it is beautiful. Full of beautiful buildings, scenery, beaches and (apart from me) beautiful people.

    I sometimes think that life gives us all a helping hand when it knows we are meant to be in the right place at the right time. Sounds like life was giving Debby a helping hand (or should I say foot!) for the time she was on Mykonos. How very nice to see strangers again who we get on so very well with. Just goes to show there is so much kindness in this world of ours.

    Debby is also a great supporter of my blog and somebody I would most certainly like to meet up with should our paths ever come anywhere close to passing for real. I know they have passed on here, but hopefully one day for real as well.

    Like

    • Thanks Hugh and I am sure that some of us will meet up in person – certainly easier when I am in Portsmouth more frequently.. I am there next week and my two sisters have filled the dance card.. looking forward to it.. leaving David to look after the ongoing work and I will be completely offline for 8 days.. First time in 18 months that I have not posted..or checked emails… withdrawal symptoms may need to be treated with chocolate and vino!! hugs

      Like

      • I’m not even going to think about eight days away from the internet, Sally. I thought I was going to have four days away from the internet over last weekend but I just could not help myself in taking a quick look every now and again (when ever my partner fell asleep!)

        I’m sure chocolates and vino will help. Lots of good food and drink, a show in the Westend, and meeting up with some friends certainly helped me. I’d almost forgotten what shopping for real (not on the internet) was like. John Lewis in Oxford Street was surreal!

        I look forward to meeting up hopefully the next time you are visiting, Sally.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Hugh. You are so kind! Lol, I love your pun about the hand, er, the foot. 🙂 And don’t be so hard on yourself; you a certainly one of the ‘beautiful people.’ Oh wouldn’t it just be so awesome if our circles could meet in person for a time! Hmm, we get what we focus on! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  7. What a wonderful interview Sally, And your questions brought out wonderful responses from DG..So much is passed onto children when parents split, and DG is doing excellent work in her passing on her knowledge and insights through her own traumatic childhood experiences. Which leave hidden scars that can take lots of in-depth healing work to release..

    I was especially interested in the AWOL story to Mykonos, and the subsequent synchronisities of the invited guests 🙂 I am sure DG will know my own thoughts on such occurrences are indeed Divinely timed when we need help, the Universe listens to our Pleas.. 🙂

    Many thanks, I truly enjoyed reading and digesting..
    Blessings
    Sue

    Liked by 1 person

      • yes I agree with you Sally on both counts.. DG and I met in the blogging world of WP only a few short months ago.. But our life stories are more than coincidental 🙂 as we have both discovered 🙂 It was a superb interview 🙂 Thank you ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  8. A great interview. I haven’t had any experience in dealing with narcissism. I can only imagine the impact it would have on anyone, especially a child. Every child looks to his/her parents for love, approval, and support. This must have been an extremely difficult time.
    As a big fan of memoirs, all three of the books mentioned sound like great reads, especially Meno-What? A Memoir.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you, Sally and Debby. I love all the anecdotes, especially the one about the providential stranger/angels who helped with the hurt foot. Thanks too for the mention of journal keeping. I have kept journals in my adult life. How I wish I had some from the early years.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Debby is a powerful writer with an important story to tell. Understanding how to move on from difficult parents is one of the most challenging lessons to learn. Debby’s story is empowering and her words can help others. Great interview, Sally. And for those who haven’t read any of Debby’s work, you should fix that!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Reblogged this on Jo Robinson and commented:
    What a fantastic interview! I found one of D G Kaye’s books browsing on line a while ago, and laughed so hard I nearly fell of my chair – brilliant author. Now I see she has other books out – one concerning her narcissistic parent – another subject I find absolutely riveting – I’ll be reading all of these. Thanks for sharing another great author Sal!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Great to learn even more about you, Debbie. Wow, godsends all around with your little Dutch boy and Aussie friends. Friends have pulled through for me too when I most needed and yet least expected… Angels? Definitely! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  13. What a fascinating read. Firstly, I have to say I love the Greek islands, hubby and I have visited Crete twice and plan to go again, so I can well understand your attraction to the islands. I loved your story. I’m a firm believer in God sending ‘angels’ to us, just when we need them, experiencing this when uprooting numerous times, whether at ‘home’ in England or when moving to California where I didn’t know anybody and had no family close by, but over the two decades, I was amazed at all the ‘coincidences’ and came to understand that although some friendship remain and are life long, others are for a season.
    The excerpts from all your books grabbed me, having grown up in a dysfunctional family with family problems including an alcoholic father who went on to a life of crime, and other issues which I don’t write publicly about. I have done my own research on narcissism and sociopathy over the years in a better effort to try and better understand just what happened in my growing up years and why I felt so alone and why my voice counted for nothing. I was the classic good girl who kept quiet, yet raged inside and as you share here, took me until well into my 40s before I at last was able to start the journey to becoming the person I should have been all along. Still on that path!
    I am sorry for all you suffered in your relationship with your mother. It is difficult for me to say too much, but I see a great deal of myself and my experiences mirrored in what you share here. And so I thank you again Debbie for sharing your inspirational story through your books (and yes, how refreshing to read about the ‘M’ word, ha!) and for providing all the links.
    Thank you so much Sally for this wonderful interview, and it’s lovely to meet you Debbie 🙂 ~ Sherri

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much Sherri for your comments, and sharing your own circumstances. We learn from reading other’s writing that there are many of us who encountered abusive situations, yet many don’t bring it to light. It’s empowering to embrace our experiences and shed light on them to help ourselves understand, but mostly to let others know they aren’t alone. Thank you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  14. What a lovely interview. As usual Sally, you are so professional and classy. I love your positive attitude. And Debby, that’s quite a serendipitous story of your stay in Mykonos. Now, I know where your kindness and bravery come from. You certainly had angels looking over you! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I much enjoyed the interview, Sally… I came via D.G’s blog…
    The guest post is beautiful and Debby’s answers as to her travels and how she was able to luck out with favourable odds here and there are so thought-provoking… I truly believe that we can do that even when Fate or Destiny are such powerful forces… Going further, her words made me think of here memoir “Conflicted Hearts”, which I absolutely recommend!… All my best wishes. Aquileana 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Pingback: The Saturday Round Up – The last one for a couple of weeks | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

  17. “Statistics show that many adults are still held under the powers of a narcissistic parent.” This is so true Debbie. Sadly, many adults, well into their forties and fifties are still struggling with the way a parent (or parents) treats them. I’m glad to see more conversation about Narcissism because although I’m not a psychologist, I believe that many relationship issues can be traced back to a Narcissistic parent. As you’ve said, it’s a “major feat to become freed from the power that parents hold over us, mainly from their use of guilt as a means to obtain what they demand.” Also their sense of entitlement is so engrained in us from an early age, enforced by society, that we believe it as well. This is why awareness is so important. So many people need to be freed from this chokehold.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for commenting Lynette and will pass onto Debby – it is interesting to discover how many women in their 50s and particularly 60s had this experience especially with their mothers who are in their 80s and 90s. I wonder if it is something to do with being born in that transition period between the traditional homemaking roles for women and the development of a more career focused generation.. I certainly felt that jealousy was a primary motivator with the treatment meted out.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. You are welcome Sally. It’s interesting that you mention the correlation between women in their 50s and 60s who have experienced Narcissism. I’ve noticed this too, although I’ve seen a few comments from women a bit older. And yes, jealousy is a major characteristic of Narcissism. I think it does have something to do with the era that we were living in at that time. And yes, the transition from traditional homemaking roles and the development of more career-focused roles for women may have had something to do with it, that was perhaps suppressed prior to this time, but I do believe that it goes more deeper into the psyche of the Narcissism. I say this because Narcissists are known for picking one of their children to mistreat, while leaving the others intact. Would love to hear from Debbie why she thinks most of the women that have experienced Narcissism are reportedly in their 50s and 60s. Still trying to figure out what the common denominator is…

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Pingback: Guest author feature with Sally Cronin - #Friendship, Short Stories

I would be delighted to receive your feedback (by commenting, you agree to Wordpress collecting your name, email address and URL) Thanks Sally

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.