The 12 days of Essexmas (a secular celebration)

Jessica Norrie has been on the Prosecco.. not only has she done her own version of The Twelve Days of Christmas.She is feeling very Essexmassy… Having lived in Essex.. I have fond memories… sing along with her and buy her book The Infinity Pool for only 99p for an as yet undetermined festive period.. #recommended.

Words and Fictions

Here’s my 2017 swansong, inspired by a dash to the shops this morning.

On the 1st day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

A massive wide screen TV (no photo. Think I’m stupid, burglars?)

On the 2nd day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

Cusk 72 white vans and a massive wide screen TV

On the 3rd day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

bling inflatables3 blurry Santas, 2 white vans and a massive wide screen TV

On the 4th day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

4 festive napkins, 3 blurry Santas, 2 white vans and a massive wide screen TV

Bling napkins 4On the 5th day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

FIVE TRAFFIC JAMS!

On the 6th day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

6 bits of bling, FIVE TRAFFIC JAMS! 4 festive napkins, 3 blurry Santas, 2 white vans and a massive wide screen TV

On the 7th day of Essexmas, Essex man sent me:

7 saddo snowflakes, 6 bits of bling, FIVE TRAFFIC…

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