Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – #PotLuck – Are We Lost in #Social Oblivion? by D.G. Kaye

Welcome to the series of Posts from Your Archives, where bloggers put their trust in me. In this series, I dive into a blogger’s archives and select four posts to share here to my audience.

If you would like to know how it works here is the original post:

Here is the fourth of the posts I have selected from the archives of D.G. Kaye, Debby Gies who is a regular contributor to the blog with her travel column and also as a guest comedian…Debby has some terrific posts on blogging and social media… and here is one that I think we can all relate to.

Are We Lost in #Social Oblivion? by D.G. Kaye

Social media sharing

Today I’m going to share my thoughts here on the madness of social media, and book promoting, and our constant battle to keep up with everything social media to stay afloat with our presence.

I’m speaking for myself, but I know my thoughts are shared by many a writer. As writers, we all develop our routines, and although every one of us has our own methods of tackling our ‘to do’ lists, if we’re writing books, much of what we do will involve ways to market our books using social media.

With the explosion of new authors and books in the past few years, there are waves of cries to ‘buy my book’ in order to be heard through a sea of social media blasts. I sometimes feel as though I’m drowning in that sea. But I don’t wish to become one of the ‘hard sell’ authors, and I don’t even spend nearly enough time or dollars doing the amount of marketing I’m urged to do through all the social outlets I follow and with all the subscriptions I read from newsletters telling me about another method to push my books.

Sure I read many articles to stay abreast. I’ll bookmark pertinent information and save it to Evernote for the time I’m ready to tackle it. But with all I read, I still can’t bring myself to become an aggressive marketer. I have my daily routine planned the night before with my list of things to accomplish, and that keeps my plate full as it is. As much as I want to try a million new ideas out, there are only so many hours in a day. So I prioritize with my book writing days and my blog post days. I’ve learned what social media sites I gravitate to most. I’ve built friendships and followers who I can chat with, share with, or just have a simple ‘thank you’ for sharing rapport with for dedicated sharers. I read many blogs, and like and comment where I feel like contributing, and if I enjoyed a post, I’ll share it to my social sites.

This routine I have was never a strategy to gain followers, but somehow it had led me to gathering readers and making some wonderful friends along the way. This is who I am, and I don’t wish to conform to being one of those hounds shouting hashtags to ‘buy my book’.

And what may have prompted me to write this you may be thinking?

I came across an article yesterday while reading my morning newsletter subscriptions. This is part of my morning routine with coffee in hand, my morning newspaper. I check my personal emails first thing in the morning, and catch up on what’s going on with the writing and publishing world with my Indie newsletters. This is usually when I send out my Twitter tweets while I’m reading articles. Some also get sent to Google and Linkedin and my Facebook author page. But I check Twitter once a day only, every morning, because I have a lot of writers that follow me, and I know some will find these posts informative because I’m sure that’s why they followed me in the first place. I know my posts are interesting to some because I’ve gained quite a few followers in the past few years, and I can honestly say I never search for people to follow, they find me, and I decide if I will follow back based on the criteria I have for following back.

My usual stipulations for NOT following back are: They use an egg as a replacement for a photo, no bio or website, hard sellers, or promisers to get you hundreds of followers for a price, or of course pornographic posts. I don’t hesitate to follow someone just because they may have few followers. I’m not looking for popularity, but sincerity and something informative offered. I always follow back authors because I believe if they took the time to follow my posts they’re eager to learn, especially if they’re new and just starting their platforms. This is just the way I roll in life with the people I congregate with and develop friendships with. If they’re sincere, forthgiving, and informative, I’m in.

Now, the reason I’m sharing this here today goes back to 2 relevant posts I came across from 2 articles I read in parts from a writer, Delilah Dawson from Whimsydark. She wrote about herself not being one of ‘those authors’ who are constantly pushing their books at every opportunity. She makes a pertinent point in her post that if people like you, and like what you have to say they may just follow you and buy your books because of those qualities, and eventually, hopes that word of mouth become our best marketing tool. Her point is to keep writing and doing what works and states that current trends don’t necessarily dictate what works for everyone.

The articles resonated with me because that’s what I do. I do my thing, and socialize where I enjoy being best, not trying to dance at every wedding (every social site) because there just isn’t enough time to do everything. Below I will give you a sampling of the two posts with the link to continue reading. I think you will find them good reads.

Spend your energy and time being kind to your colleagues, thanking your publishing team, and making new friends with no expectation that you will eventually use them to claw your way to the top. Before you Friend another writer on Facebook, make sure it’s because you legitimately want to know them better and be part of their life and not because you’re planning on sending them an Event invitation or a link to your book…Continue reading

And here is her follow up article:

“Adding value means passing on truly helpful links, retweeting job listings or calls for submissions, wishing someone a happy launch day, recommending books you’ve enjoyed, discussing the news of the day in a respectful and thoughtful manner, talking about an upcoming event, or generally saying things that make someone’s day just a little brighter. Over time, people will begin to trust you as you repeatedly add value to their life..Continue reading

I hope you enjoy these posts and take something from them as I did. They confirmed to me that I’m doing just fine the way I’m doing. And please feel free to leave me your comments because I’d like to know where you guys stand on the marketing front.

©D.G. Kaye 2016

Debby writes a monthly travel column here on Smorgasbord and you can find all her articles:

About D.G. Kaye

Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.

D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.

When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.
I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences. I write raw and honest about my own experiences, hoping through my writing, that others can relate and find that there is always a choice to move from a negative space, and look for the positive.

“Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”

                 “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”

When I’m not writing, I’m reading or quite possibly looking after some mundane thing in life. It’s also possible I may be on a secret getaway trip, as that is my passion—traveling.

Books by D.G. Kaye

One of the reviews for Twenty Years After “I do” on Goodreads.

Aug 27, 2018 Janice Spina rated it it was amazing
A Loving Reflection of Twenty Years of Marriage!

I thoroughly enjoyed this book, Twenty Years: After “I Do”. It was a heartfelt journey through the author’s life with her devoted and loving husband who is much older than she. I laughed along with her and shed tears of sorrow when she did.

D.G. Kaye expressed herself in endearing terms when she spoke of her husband and their wonderful life together. She wrote with deep expressions of angst over serious health issues they both experienced and then joy over happy times with much shared laughter.

Marriage is a difficult union as anyone who has been married knows. This book takes the reader down this path to discover the true meaning of soul mates and undying love from one another. D.G. shares the beauty of each day that she and her husband, Gordon, have had together and continue to have even in adversity. She displays a remarkable wit in tough times and a brilliant resilience to go on no matter what she must face.

This book is a must read for all who have been married whether for a short time or a longer time. All couples face similar situations and must make tough decisions in their lives together. The author has shown how she has had to deal with serious health issues and come out stronger and more persistent to make the best of every day she and her husband have left together. For isn’t that part of our marriage vows – to love each other in sickness and health till death do us part?

Read all the reviews and buy the books:

and Amazon UK:

More reviews and follow Debby on Goodreads:

Connect to Debby Gies

About me:
Twitter: (yes there’s a story)

My thanks to Debby for allowing me to share her archived posts and I hope you will head over to her blog and delve into them even more.. thanks Sally.

66 thoughts on “Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – #PotLuck – Are We Lost in #Social Oblivion? by D.G. Kaye

  1. I really like this post, Debby. Most of the writers and bloggers in our network are nice people who all support each other. I don’t think many of us are hard marketers, but I don’t think that works anyhow. I think people get bored with posts and tweets that are just sell, sell, sell.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Excellent post and true, Debby. I tend to purchase the books of bloggers that I have a relationship with… and the relationship always comes before the purchase. But, I also have to know that they have books out there and an occasional post about their WIP or new release or a wonderful review is a good reminder in case, for some reason, I haven’t already picked it up. 😀 Wise advice for authors. Thanks for sharing, Sally!

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I like your style, Debby. I’m so new to this world, but I never want to become one of those bothersome people who continuously try to sell something. (I’m not necessarily referring to writers—this is a general comment). I had a good friend who started selling Amway products, and it got to be that I dreaded his phone calls. Being happy is way more important to me than selling a few more books by being obnoxious.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. So true Debby, there isn’t time to dance at every wedding. In my opinion it’s best just to confine ourselves to just 2 or 3 social media sites and only post just once a day ourselves, otherwise it’s just too overwhelming trying to keep up with it all.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I enjoyed this post, Debby. I’m not a sale person at all. I don’t know how my husband did it when he ran his business. I can’t make cold calls. I feel guilty to ask people buy my products (anything I would be selling). ❤

    I agree that we can only do so much with social media. I value friendship more than anything.

    Thank you Sally for finding this great post from Debby's archives. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Pingback: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up.. John Wick 3 -Spirits in the Sky, Polar Bears and Apple Daiquiris | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

  7. A great post and so true. I’ve never appreciated a hard sale and have never been a born salesperson. That’s not what I started writing for, and I’ve the lost the little interest I might have had in it. On top of that, I agree that it doesn’t work. Thanks, Debby and Sally.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Thanks Debby. I speak your sort of language. I was never over-ambitious and often let life take me where it fancied…(not always the best idea). Of course, I love to receive a thumbs up for my poems, stories and books and actually receiving the odd royalty payment (like €1.69) is rather nice (goes towards a cup of coffee!) BUT I write because I love writing. Simple as that really. And, equally, I thoroughly enjoy ‘meeting’ people on line and speaking their language. Receiving friendly vibes over the air waves is better than medicine, and interacting with like-minded people always a pleasure. Hugs xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Great points Joy.. despite being online relationships it is still between people and not machines… and that is so important. I look at my mother’s interactions and they were restricted to her increasingly smaller group of friends.. whereas we have unlimited access around the clock to people who entertain, inform and support us.. hugsx

      Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for sharing your thoughts here Joy. I think many of us write with same reasons. We obviously have to have the passion inbred us to keep slogging on despite all the other stuff that comes with it. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I thoroughly enjoy being on the social media platforms where I am, and I have found that it’s only because I don’t necessarily go on every platform every day. I’m skipping FB more and more and learning that I don’t hate Twitter as much as I thought I did. In fact, I look forward to spending time on Twitter more than FB at this point. I like each platform for different reasons, but I find that dropping the ones that I just don’t “get” has been very freeing. I wrote a post about the Fear Of Missing Out on social media and I need to remember to take my own advice sometimes. This was a truly great post, Debby.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Debby is one of my role models for successful blogging, she’s a no nonsense blogger. I don’t collect people. If someone has an interest in my writing or art I’m grateful, I don’t ‘collect’ people so I’m not concerned with my ‘follower’ count.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Wonderful post, Debby and I agree. I believe that as indie authors we do need to put our books out there for readers to see, otherwise, we’re invisible. That being said, I have experienced that the more you do for the indie community the more they will do for you. It’s a process of give and take. Thanks for sharing, Sally! ❤ xo


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