Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Comedian in Residence D.G. Kaye and some Tongue Twisters from Sally’s Archive

First Debby Gies shares some of the funnies that she has spotted that she thinks you would enjoy…..D.G. Kaye Writer Blog is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.

 

My thanks to Debby for spotting these.. and please give her a round of applause.

D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US – Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads

Catch up with Debby’s Travel Column here every month: The Travel Column with D.G. Kaye

Now time for something from my archives…it is the time of year when office parties and Christmas family reunions, often end up in joke telling. I can tell you from experience that after a glass or two of alcoholic beverages, even the most articulate will find these a challenge.. and whilst they are busy, you can grab some more trifle….

The majority of tongue twisters are designed to help students pronounce English words correctly and then there are the Drinking Games!

Each of the following should be spoken as quickly as possible.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
Where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

Betty Botter bought some butter
But she said the butter’s bitter
If I put it in my batter, it will make my batter bitter
But a bit of better butter will make my batter better
So ‘twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood
As a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood

She sells seashells by the seashore.
The shells she sells are surely seashells.
So if she sells shells on the seashore,
I’m sure she sells seashore shells.

How many cookies could a good cook cook If a good cook could cook cookies? A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who could cook cookies.

Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager
imagining managing an imaginary menagerie.

One liners that should be said as quickly as possible and repeated as many times as you can.

Round and round the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran.

Six sleek swans swam swiftly southwards

Red lorry, yellow lorry

How many yaks could a yak pack pack if a yak pack could pack yaks?

Seventy seven benevolent elephants

New York Unique, Unique New York.

And here are the drinking games which are best practised sober and in private before attempting in polite company with a glass or two of wine inside you.. trust me!

I slit the sheet and the sheet slit me, slit was the sheet that was slit by me.

I am a pheasant plucker, I’m a pheasant pluckers son and I’ll keep plucking pheasants until the pheasant plucker comes.

Six Cockney sock cutters, cockily cutting socks.

 Let us know how you did…….that is if you are still talking to us…. and thanks for dropping in today…Debby and Sally.