Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives 2020 – #PTSD – It’s a real and present danger by P.C. Zick

Welcome to the current series of Posts from Your Archives in 2020 and if you would like to participate with two of your posts from 2019, you will find all the details in this post: New series of Posts from Your Archives 2020

This is the first post by author P.C. Zick and it is one that is both emotive and thought provoking. Patricia shares her own experience of PTSD, and that of a couple who she met who wanted their story told about their own traumatic experience. Most of us have faced tragedy of some kind in our lives, and we move on. But often we take a part of that trauma with us as a permanent reminder and it can have devastating consequences.

PTSD – It’s a real and present danger by P.C. Zick

Two Parkland shooting survivors are no longer surviving. A father of a Sandy Hook victim took his life this past week as well. These are the very real and present dangers of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that affect anyone who has suffered a trauma directly or peripherally.

My first introduction to PTSD occurred back in 2004 when I was contacted by a man and his wife who wanted help telling their story. Their therapist thought writing might help them both recover from the debilitating effects of PTSD. They found an article I’d written in a magazine in the doctor’s office and gave me a call. The first time they called, they were tentative and wouldn’t even tell me what had happened to them that had left them traumatized.

I met with them at a coffee shop. They were reluctant to talk. So, I did what I sometimes do when I’m nervous. I chattered. I told them about my life which had taken a major hit in the past three years. Something about my honesty made them trust me, and they told me their story. As I listened to their tale, I realized I too had been suffering from PTSD symptoms ever since the murder of my two great nieces by their mother in 2001.

I wrote the book for Brent and Barbara Swan and went through their horrific experience with them, which helped us all. Brent had worked for Chevron in the 1990s as a helicopter mechanic. He was stationed in Angola . He’d do six weeks on and six weeks at home. There was a small faction who’d formed an unrecognized government because they wanted the proceeds from the oil production to come to them. One morning as Brent drove to the airfield, he was kidnapped by the rebel government and held hostage for sixty days or “two moons” as he viewed his time in captivity. The U.S. government had strict guidelines about not negotiating with terrorists. Chevron had to work on his release undercover. The rebels loved Brent because he acquiesced and was a good prisoner even though they loaded up their AK-47s each morning next to his bed so he could never forget he was a hostage.

When the release was negotiated, the rebels gave Brent an honorary citizenship certificate with all their signatures. They gave him a map of all their camps, and group photos with their hostage. Brent turned it all over upon his release to the authorities.

And nothing happened. No arrests. Nothing. Brent came home and resumed a life as normal as he could. Six or seven years passed and 9/11 happened. Then all of a sudden the U.S. government became intent on bringing all known terrorists to trial. They started with the head of Brent’s kidnapping team and then the feds called Brent and told him he was the star witness.

Brent and his wife Barbara went into full survival mode PTSD when he had to travel to Washington, DC, and face his kidnapper and testify. Brent fell apart at the trial and afterwards. Barbara didn’t fare much better. When I met them in 2004, they were struggling to pull themselves out of the trenches of psychological warfare. After that initial meeting, I didn’t hear from them for more than a year.

Then I wrote their book, Two Moons in Africa (Patricia Camburn Behnke). Today I’m happy to say they are better but still living with the quirks that come from the PTSD.

My PTSD reasserts itself in times of stress or sometimes just because it can. In the past, I’ve dealt with it by writing about things other than the trauma I experienced back in 2001 and 2002. But this winter when it returned with panic attacks and depression, I decided it was time to write about how the deaths of loved ones has had an impact on me and how I cope with life’s irregularities. So far, my own self-imposed therapy is working.

I will have to finish the book before I decide if I’ll publish or not. It might turn out i’m simply writing for myself unless I see benefit to others going through similar situations.

As the news of the suicides hit this week , I considered what we can do to help those who suffer after trauma. Staying silent is not an option. Here’s a few things without even researching or digging very deep.

  • If someone doesn’t show signs of trauma after an event, it doesn’t mean she isn’t feeling isolated and alone in her fear, paranoia, grief. Without being a pest, keep her on your radar with calls, texts, cards, and/or visits. Any acts of reaching out to show her she isn’t alone may be just the thing they need.
  • Let him talk about the tragedy if he brings it up. Too many times if I tried to talk about the murders, others changed the subject. One person has told me several times he can’t deal with hearing about it because it’s too sad. Other people tell me they don’t want me to get upset by talking about it. It’s upsetting when it’s ignored, and we all should remembered that.
  • Each of us has our own timetable for grief and mourning. Do not attempt to dictate what you believe to be the proper time for someone to be over “it.” It only makes the grieving person feel as if something is wrong with her.
  • Don’t discount how a traumatic event has affected another person. Soon after I returned to work after the murders, a co-worker said to me, “Why are you so upset? It didn’t happen to you.” That set me back in my healing process by years. I still hear that voice in my head in the worst of times.

There are more I’m sure, but those are the immediate ones. Share any others you might have by leaving a comment. It can only do good because the alternative only creates another opportunity for PTSD to take hold of another life.

MayaQuote

©P.C. Zick 2019

About P.C. Zick

Bestselling author P.C. Zick describes herself as a storyteller no matter what she writes. And she writes in a variety of genres, including romance, contemporary fiction, and creative nonfiction. She’s won various awards for her essays, columns, editorials, articles, and fiction.

The three novels in her Florida Fiction Series contain stories of Florida and its people and environment, which she credits as giving her a rich base for her storytelling. She says her, “Florida’s quirky and abundant wildlife–both human and animal–supply my fiction with tales almost too weird to be believable.”

P.C. writes both sweet and steamy romances. The sweet contemporary romances in her Smoky Mountain Romances, are set in southwest North Carolina. Another sweet romance series, Rivals in Love, contains two books with four more in the works. All six follow the Crandall family of Chicago as the siblings find love despite their focus on successful careers.

Her steamy romances go from Florida to Long Island. The Behind the Love series, set in a small fictional town in Florida, feature a community of people who form bonds as they learn to overcome the challenges of their youth. Her Montauk Romances are set in and around Long Island and feature simple, yet sophisticated beach houses designed with romance in mind. The two books in this set are filled with steamy scenes as love grows and thrives.

No matter the genre of novel, they all contain elements of romance with strong female characters, handsome heroes, and descriptive settings. She believes in living lightly upon this earth with love, laughter, and passion, and through her fiction, she imparts this philosophy in an entertaining manner with an obvious love for her characters, plot, and themes.

A small selection of  books by P.C. Zick

One of the recent reviews for Love on Holiday

Now that all the kids are matched and it’s truly an empty nest, the matriarch and patriarch of the Crandall family have their story told. Mom and Dad have always lived joint but somehow separate lives, with her staying home and raising the kids and him going to work. Typical in many cases, but the last 18 years he has spent a lot of time in D.C. He decided to do that on his own. As All wives know, that is where trouble starts. Why do men think they can make life changing decisions without asking for the input from their pardner? Can talking really help? If you haven’t read the series it is okay to start here, but I would recommend reading the entire series in order. Worth reading. Clean. BTW, happy ever after is really just happy right now. Any of the couple’s in Crandall family may face hardships tomorrow, but who wants a book or a movie to end in the middle of trouble. So it’s HEA or death in the end. What happened here? You need to read.

Read the reviews and buy the books: Amazon US

And : Amazon UK

Read more reviews and follow P.C. Zick on :Goodreads

Connect to P.C. Zick

WebsiteP.C. Zick
FacebookP.C. Zick
Twitter@PCZick

My thanks to Patricia for sharing this very personal and impactful post, and if you have an experience you would like to share or a coping strategy to help others who might be suffering from PTSD, then please do so in the comments.. Thanks Sally.

53 thoughts on “Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives 2020 – #PTSD – It’s a real and present danger by P.C. Zick

  1. A beautifully expressed article, Patricia. ❤ Thank you, Sally, for sharing. ❤ There is loving grace in being able to sit beside others and gift them the space to speak, cry, howl and express their pain in their own way and their own time. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I can’t imagine what it is like. Locally we had a young family man commit suicide, he had been to Iraq and Afghanistan. Now I’m sure plenty of soldiers and civilians in two world wars had PTSD, but I imagine it must have helped that everyone had been through the same war. But to come back to a country where most people can have no idea what you have experienced and are carrying on normal everyday lives must make it so much harder.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. This is such an important post, Patricia. I’m glad you were able to give that couple some peace by writing their story. We empathize with the families who lose loved ones, but I don’t think we realize how profoundly it affects their lives.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. PTSD is such a tough thing to live with, and the world we’re living in causes it and continues to trigger it. I was surprised when I taught Education majors in general education courses that they were needing to learn trauma-informed teaching.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Pingback: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – 2nd – 8th February 2020 – Jazz, Italian Valentines appetizer, Guests, Books, Reviews and Funnies | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

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