Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives 2020 – #Memories – I Remember by Annika Perry

Welcome to the current series of Posts from Your Archives in 2020 and if you would like to participate with two of your posts from 2019, you will find all the details in this post: New series of Posts from Your Archives 2020

This is the first post by author Annika Perry and I am sure as you read, memories of your own from your childhood and teenage years will resurface and be enjoyed…

I Remember

I remember the splash of the waves against the side of my grandfather’s wooden boat, my brother standing proudly by the mast.

I remember sitting in the back, snuggled like a chick under my mother’s arms, the sea salt and my long blond ponytail lashing my cheeks.

I remember being passed to land like a bag of sugar, an exulted terrified scream then the freedom of the warm rocks beneath my feet. Away I sped, an uninhabited island awaiting exploration by five-year-old me.

I remember our trusted blue Opel Kadett swaying in the sling, over land, over the ship; a pendulum of our future. To stay, to go. Awed, fearful, I awaited its plunge to earth.

I remember the car’s thudding descent to deck, the rousing cheer from family on shore, a cheer that turned to tears as the giant ship eased from the dock.

I remember the confusion. Why cry at this adventure?

I remember my guilt. Should I cry too? A guilt often repeated.

I remember the hastily arranged assembly. The morning’s floor wax still potent and sickening. A keening nausea as we heard the news. Mr Kewley died last night; the incomprehensible words sought comprehension in my nine-year-old heart and mind.

I remember the poke in the chest, the verbal jibes, and the scornful faces. ‘Why aren’t you crying?’ they taunted. ‘He was your favourite teacher after all. Taught you all that creative writing rubbish.’

I remember the searing slurs.

I remember my silence. Shaking my head as I walked away, not shedding a tear.

I remember once home just sitting on the sofa, stroking patterns of light and dark gold, the softness reassuring, safe. Not the usual TV or books. Just space. To think. Here the disbelief turned to truth.

I remember my mother’s concerned questions. Then we rocked, me as a baby in her arms. We both wept at the loss. This was my first death; I had been lucky.

I remember my first kiss, stolen across a lilo, the warm Mediterranean Sea lapping my body as I paddled languidly to land. My first kiss! A moment I will always remember, bubbling with excitement, with unadulterated joy of being so grown-up.

I remember splashing along the shore, the air mattress dangling loosely in my grasp, ripples of emotions echoing into eternity.

I remember my feigned indignant recount of THE kiss to my mother. A secret I’d pressed like a diamond to my heart to treasure forever. A secret bursting to be shared.

I remember her brief questions, her sweet smile. ‘We are meeting later,’ I declared. And so we did!

I remember the strums of the bouzouki, the warm light and night, seeing people on the dance floor, chatting at the tables. There he was! Heading over to me. Almost swooning, a maelstrom of emotions rushed through my body. We had a quick chat. He asked my age. ‘Fourteen,’ I replied nonchalantly. A surprised look flittered across his face then quickly vanished as he invited me and my family to meet his family. I was stricken!

I remember rueing my young age.

I remember longing for its return.

I remember a normal spring day, the German lesson in the Portakabin going as usual. My five friends and I. Unflappable Mrs Stockums at the front. As normal in the sixth form we discussed topics with ease and determination.

I remember the quiet giggles. Who was it? Katy? Sally? Chris? As a fast moving contagion the laughter skipped from student to student. Side-bursting laughter. We tried to rein it in. Honestly. Amidst the uproarious chuckles, we cast furtive nervous glances to our teacher. Was she laughing too? Impossible!

I remember the cacophony of pure happiness. At life itself. Such a jubilant sound of innocence and delight at being. We barely dared look at one another, such was the danger of setting off another cascade of stomach-churning laughter.

I remember the ache of my side, the slam on the teacher’s desk. ‘Go outside,’ she mumbled, pointing at the door. ‘Ten minutes then come back silently. And sit apart.’ The biting breeze startled us as we marched up and down, calming the inexplicable immersive laughter. It hadn’t quite disappeared but already I was mourning its departure.

I remember those summers of sizzling sun, drifting in dinghies along thirsty riverbeds.

I remember those school days, whether good or bad, always coddled at home.

I remember too much.

I remember too little.

© Annika Perry, February 2019

Annika’s new release. A delightful children’s book, perfect for 3 – 6 year olds – Oskar’s Quest.

About the book

Oskar is afraid of adventures. Yet one day he finds himself on a mysterious island which needs his help.Join Oskar on this unexpected and magnificent quest, where he finds not only courage but so much more…“It’s light, extremely enjoyable and very gripping.” Esther Chilton – author & editor.Perfect for ages 3 to 6.

One of the recent reviews for Oskar’s Quest on Goodreads

Jan 26, 2020 Jill rated it it was amazing

As a longtime follower of writer Annika Perry’s blog, I was excited when I heard she was working on a children’s book. From the first page, Oskar captured my heart, taking me on a journey to save a beautiful songbird, while meeting new friends along the way. This enchanting story is perfect for both children and adults, teaching lessons on the importance of caring for others and overcoming ones fears. The illustrations along with the lovely writing made this story come to life.

Head over to read the reviews and buy the book: Amazon UK

And: Amazon US

Also by Annika Perry

Read the reviews and buy the books: Amazon UK

And: Amazon US

Read more reviews and follow Annika: Goodreads

About Annika Perry

Annika Perry is a full-time writer, blogger and book reviewer. She was born in Gothenburg, Sweden and raised near Ilkley, West Yorkshire. Annika received her BA Honours Degree in German Language and Literature from the University of Leeds. Her initial employment was as a journalist followed by many years as an agent in the timber trade. She was awarded first prize in Writing Magazine’s Short Story Competition in 2014 and also shortlisted in an Ink Tears Short Fiction Contest. “The Storyteller Speaks”, a collection of short stories, flash fiction and poetry, was her debut book. “Oskar’s Quest”, a beautifully illustrated and enchanting children’s story, is her second published book. Annika Perry lives with her family in a small village in North Essex, England.

Connect to Annika

Author Website: Annika Perry Author
Linkedin: Annika Perry Author

Twitter    @AnnikaPerry68

My thanks to Annika for sharing this lovely nostalgic post and I know that she would love your feedback.. thanks Sally.

160 thoughts on “Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives 2020 – #Memories – I Remember by Annika Perry

  1. Sally, warmest thanks for featuring this first of my two posts for your archive series! 😀 As you mention, this is a piece particularly close to my heart, a whirlwind of disparate memories to make a harmonious whole.

    Thank you also for your wonderful support of all us indie writers … you’ve taught me a lot over the years (without you even knowing it!) hugs xx ❤️

    Liked by 4 people

  2. What a lovely post Sally, reads more like poetry. I could connect with the jibes… “why aren’t you crying.” And yes, laughter that wouldn’t cease 🙂 Memories are precious possessions. Thanks for sharing Annika.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Oh, how beautiful. And how very sweet, “like a bag of sugar” 🙂 True,we do remember too little.
    It brought tears to my eyes.
    What a lovely Lady, Annika, with a special soul. A fantastic post, Sally!
    Thank you, Ladies.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Annika, I remember the story you wrote
    The life you lit with your words.

    I so agree with Balroop that you write this story as a poem. It is fantastic, I said this before
    and feel the strength now. You paint your early life with such vivid words, such strength.
    With featherlight touch you bring emotions forth and tears to our eyes.

    Thank you Sally for featuring Annika and her post, Remember.


    Liked by 3 people

  5. Wow, what an amazing piece of writing from Annika. I have different memories, but it’s startling how those bubble up after reading this. Childhood invokes childhood in a universal way. Beautiful share, Sally.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Reblogged this on Annika Perry's Writing Blog and commented:
    Memories play a pivotal role in all our lives, and in one piece of writing, I let my consciousness take a back-seat as I explored my own past. I’m delighted to share ‘I Remember’ as it is featured on Sally Cronin’s inspired ‘Posts from Your Archives’ series. I’ve turned comments off here and look forward to seeing you on Sally’s blog!

    Liked by 3 people

  7. I am delighted to have come across this blog, Annika. Your memories are vivid, poignant, and charming. Images of a place and time so different from my childhood, growing up in the heat and poverty of California’s central valley, miles from the nearest town… with the polluted waters of a canal my substitute for your splashing waves. You prompt me to use the “I Remember” format to create a disparaging collection of my own. Thank you. ❤

    Liked by 3 people

  8. I’ve been following Annika for a while and am charmed by this as with all of her writing. Oh to long for a simpler time when life was about to begin in earnest. Lovely thoughts.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bless! 😀 Ally, it has been lovely to get to you know in the recent months and heartfelt thanks for your wonderful and kind comment … this means so much to me. I totally agree that it’s easy to long for such times when life was simpler – but then I wonder if that is just with the benefit of hindsight and perspective of life. I remember such stressful and harrowing (to me) moments that seemed all-consuming. Memories are a strange a phenomenon and they can be fickle with time!😀

      Liked by 2 people

  9. How wonderful and very moving. Your well written words will stay with me for a long time, Annika. They have awakened so many of my own long forgotten memories. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  10. I am very interested in the indie communities that support and encourage each other. It has been a delight to read Annika’s reflections as well as the generosity of your community. We must record our stories because they are a part of a wider story of humanity.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Rebecca, you are so right about the importance of recording the stories from our communities, our families and know you are working earnestly to do exactly this. I love hearing your mother’s recollections, and you are building up a living archive of social history.❤️

      The generosity of the community here on WP knows no bounds and Sally is a tour de force is supporting indie writers. Without her help just over two years ago I would not be where I am today. As it looked that my book ‘The Storyteller Speaks’ was not going to be published (a long story of being badly let down, some of it touched on posts in November/December 2017) Sally came to the rescue! Her amazing offer of help with my manuscript from both herself and her husband David was incredible. With no forewarning, David took on my book and brought it to publication. I have tears in my eyes just recalling these weeks … support and encouragement that ensured my dream of being a published writer was realised.

      Wishing both you and Sally a wonderful weekend! xx 😀❤️

      Liked by 2 people

  11. I remember this post! It captures so well those moments of violent emotion we all experience as children and teenagers. I was punished for laughing in class a couple of times, too. Being sent out to calm down was better than the time I had to stand at the front of the class with my face to the wall – I just couldn’t stop laughing and the teacher became SO cross!
    Annika, your writing is wonderful – and Sally, thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Clare, I was hoping someone would start their comment with these words – ‘I remember this post!’😀 I loved learning about your laughing moment at school and how horrid to be sent to face the wall. I’m cheering as you just continued to laugh – the teacher now impotent in the face of your giggles! Don’t they realise the wonderful energy, health benefits and joy of such laughter moments? In the episode I describe, the teacher in the end sent us all outside for ten minutes to calm down (including herself!) after which we had to sit at separate desks for the rest of the week! Fair enough! Thank you for your lovely comment, Clare and wish you a wonderful and hopefully calm weather-wise weekend! 🌸

      Liked by 2 people

  12. Pingback: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – 16th – 22nd February 2020 | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

  13. Hi Sally and Annika. Initially, I had to wrap my mind around the concept of this series of posts. Your link describes the details well. Sally, your phrase “…reached a different audience and encouraged more readers for their own blogs and current posts” resonated with me. Also, goosebumps about the example you chose, Darlene Foster. Darlene’s article discusses Medicine Hat, located in the province of Alberta. I live in the adjacent province, British Columbia. I have bookmarked Darlene’s name and I will read more about her.

    I have known Annika only a few months and I immediately became a fan of her gift with writing and her connection with the readers. Posts from her Archives is perfect for someone like me!

    Annika, My body is feeling this memory. Descriptions such as “…being passed to land like a bag of sugar…”. I have memories when I was five years old. I don’t know whether it is because we can articulate our thoughts at that age?

    The words “sought comprehension.” I also recall events that did not truly make sense when I was five and nine.

    I stopped taking notes and I was pulled into your story, your memories, my memories. “I remember too much. I remember too little.”

    Maybe, this is your secret. Wow, Annika! I am like you.💕

    Liked by 2 people

    • Erica, I love how you’re drawn to Sally’s blog and this series in particular. As a blog magazine, there is always something that will strike a particular chord and the post archives are a great way for people to catch up on posts they’ve missed from last year. How lovely that you live close to Darlene – I’ve known her for years on WP and she is a successful author and also such a warm, generous and kind woman. I’m sure you’ll enjoy her blog.

      Erica, I can’t believe you were taking notes as you read ‘I Remember’. That’s incredible and thank you so much. I value your thoughts upon my piece and was intrigued by how both you and Sally picked up on the language used for the younger me parts. I must admit this was instinctive but I was reaching into the memory me and as you say the words reflect the age of a child.

      There were so many instances as young that I ‘sought comprehension’ and I felt frustrated at not fully understanding a situation … ever since I’ve tried to look for enlightenment in any situation – probably being too open at times!

      Your comment touches me deeply and I’m teary-eyed at your words, Erica. Like a ball of energy and emotion, you appeared on my blog and I treasure the instant friendship and connection!

      Congratulations again on the birth of your grandson and wishing you and your family an amazing and exciting start to 2020! hugs xx❤️

      Liked by 2 people

      • Hi Annika, Interesting choice of words “ball of energy and emotion.” I believe you evoke this energy and emotion due to your energy and your words. I agree with Sally, how your writing strikes a chord with people from all walks of life.🌻

        You remind me how the most precious gift we have is “time.” Where and how we choose to spend our “time.” I choose to spend it with people who are interesting, smart, uplifting, positive, candid, vulnerable, and on this journey of creativity and life. 💕 I choose to spend it with you, Annika, reading your beautiful words. 💕 I, too, treasure the instant friendship and connection.💗

        Liked by 2 people

  14. Sally and Annika, Delayed in commenting this week since I had the privilege of being present at the birth of my grandson. Flurry of activity and grateful beyond words. I am happy to be back to reading, especially the gems. 💕

    Liked by 2 people

    • Wow! Erica, huge congratulations! 😀❤️ How amazing to have been present at the birth of your grandson … a gift for your daughter to have you there and also for you. My mother was there when my son was born and I’m sure I couldn’t have done it without her and it’s an experience she treasures. I’m not surprised you’ve been busy … wonderful reason for being away! A new precious life to attend to … ahh… celebratory hugs xx🤗

      Liked by 2 people

  15. Wonderful words about memories. They were a delight to read. I had no idea Annika had two books under her belt.Annika is a blogger friend of mine and her writing is inspirational. I will have to investigate the archives post more!

    Liked by 2 people

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