Firstly, with the results of sleuthing on the Internet are some funnies from Debby Gies followed by some jokes from Sally.
D.G. Writes is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.
Thanks to Debby for finding this treasures… please give her a round of applause..
D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads
Check out Debby’s new series here on Smorgasbord D.G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships 2020
And now time for a joke or two from my archives……
Say what?
Miss Smythe was miffed… Her pet a Chihuahua was consistently second in dog shows throughout the country… One day she decided to investigate by asking the judges why this was happening. It was explained to her that the true Chihuahua breed had smooth coats and her dog, despite being perfect in every other way, had a shaggy coat.
Miss Smythe decided to take action and popped into a local pharmacist to buy some hair remover.
The chemist handed her the latest product. ‘When you slap this on, it’s best to keep your arms up for two or three minutes,’ he said.
‘Oh it’s not for my underarms, it’s for my Chihuahua,’ she explained.
‘In that case,’ said the chemist, ‘don’t ride a bike for 30 minutes.’
And now a few one liners…..please add your level of groans in the comment section rated between 1 -10….
Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning ‘Many’. and Tics, meaning ‘blood sucking parasites’.
Of all the blood groups,type Os make the most spelling mistakes..
When the Irish say that St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland, what they don’t tell you is that he was the only one who saw any snakes!
His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Finnegan. “Did she say anything before she died?” asked the sergeant. “She spoke without interruption for about forty years,” said the Finnegan.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Borrow money from a pessimist – they don’t expect it back.
Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
Thanks for dropping in and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.
10 out of 10 groans followed by laughs 😂
LikeLiked by 4 people
Oh good… the jackpot..thanks Chris…hugsxx♥
LikeLiked by 2 people
🤗❤️🤗 😂
LikeLike
The first cartoon reminded me of a comedian (Rich Hall, I think) who said, “Why do dogs stick their heads out of car windows when you are driving, but they get mad at you when you blow in their face?”
LikeLiked by 2 people
Good question… and we may have the answer…lol
LikeLike
`Loved the laughs today, definitely a 10/10 score from me. 😀
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks Ann… delighted to hear…hugsxx
LikeLike
Those tv combos were the best. And note to self to never hire someone with type-O blood to do some editing for me… 🙂
LikeLiked by 3 people
lol good idea.. I am a Type O myself! xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well done, ladies. I always wondered what dogs were thinking about when they stuck their heads out of cars.
LikeLiked by 2 people
We do love to solve riddles here..lol.. glad you enjoyed Robbie..hugs
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL Robbie xx
LikeLiked by 2 people
Much needed humour – thanks!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Glad you enjoyed Alex..hugsx
LikeLike
Excellent as usual, Sally and Debby.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you John..hugsx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha! I remember those TV, record-player, bars! Lol. And he chihuahua joke got me going. Lol. Thanks for the laughs.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I wonder if there is a place they have all been stored retro is coming back and they might be worth something…as to the chihuahua!!! xxx
LikeLiked by 2 people
LOL Diana, we really had one. Like an allinone printer, but not LOL 🙂 xxx
LikeLiked by 2 people
Love the television/record player/liquor cabinet combo extravaganza!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I thought they were fabulous… my parents had one which had a seat attached too… xx
LikeLiked by 2 people
And a seat attached? Lol, almost souds like my Cadillac couch I live, eat and work on lmaoooooooo ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think yours sounds very much more plush Debby… the seat only had a thinnish seat and was a tad low.. I remember having to hoist elderly relatives off it at their parties….hugs ♥
LikeLiked by 1 person
LMAO ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
♥
LikeLiked by 1 person
That must have been the grandest television console ever to grace a livingroom!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol and its well stocked booze cabinet was definitely a hit with us teenagers! xx
LikeLike
Lol, politics and support bacteria are 10s! Loved Chihuahua LOLOL ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Poor dog having its name brought into disrepute…..lol ♥
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOLOL ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol – My thoughts in the past: Supporting bacteria as the only culture some have. 😉 Here i meant the multi bacteria colonies inside our local home brewery. 😉 Michael
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Michael…and your beer has a fearsomely good reputation…so definitely multi-cultural….hugsx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol But here they want not to be said this way. Some of the brewers are rotating right, like some yoghurt cultures. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love beginning my Wednesday with these! 10 groans and a few moans with that list! I think this may be my favorite …Politics: Poli, a Latin word meaning ‘Many’. and Tics, meaning ‘blood-sucking parasites’. 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol.. many a word spoken in jest….thanks Soooz.. glad you enjoyed..hugsxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
🤗
LikeLiked by 1 person
Here’s my standing ovation, ladies. You did it so effortless! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Miriam.. nothing makes us happier..♥
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤ ❤
LikeLike
Love, love the word politics broken down into something I can understand. 🙂 10 groans for sure and several chuckles!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Who ever came up with that definition should be writing their speeches… hugsxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love the brownie tip. I must try it. LOL!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am with you on that Mary Anne..x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Pingback: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – The Weekly Round Up – July 5th -11th 2020 – Josh Groban, Mango, Pigeons, Dublin 1944, Books, Health and Laughter | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine