Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – June 8th 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Catnip and Groaners

Welcome to laughter lines with some gems from Debby Gies who has been keeping an eye open for funnies online and some jokes from Sally.

And a video that shows that catnip is to cats what chocolate is to Sally….turn the sound down… thanks to Meme Gig

 

If you have not discovered the non-fiction books by D.G. Kaye: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Check out Debby’s column here on Smorgasbord D.G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships 2020

Now something from Sally

David (my husband) has a secret stash… thankfully only one-liners and here is part one of some new groaners…

“I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a
Chinese Wispa.”

I once went to one of those parties where everyone throws their car keys into the middle of the room. I don’t know who got my moped but I’ve been driving that Peugeot for years.

I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.

I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again.

You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks.

I have a really nice stepladder. Sadly I never knew my real ladder.

I phoned the swine flu hotline and all I got was crackling.

I needed a bank security password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister

My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to
him: “Don’t be Sicily”.

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting!

Hedgehogs. Why can’t they just share the hedge?

Contact lenses are a little bit like parents – the older they get the more they irritate you, then you lose one of them and the one that is left behind gives you a constant headache.

My drink was spiked with speed. I didn’t mind so much because I got loads of hoovering done.

I was in my car and I was driving along and my boss rang up and he said: “You’ve been promoted.” And I swerved. He rang again and said “You’re managing director.” And I went into a tree. A policeman came up and said: “What happened to you?” And I said: “I careered off the road.”

Thanks for dropping in and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.