Author Daniel Kemp entertains us again with his funnies from: Danny Kemp .. Always a place to find funnies and jokes to cheer you up… plus some satirical political commentary on politicians at home and abroad. –
It is a year since Danny began to entertain us and here are some reminders of that year and a couple of great jokes that he has shared recently..
And to finish up…one of Danny’s finest….
There was an old country sheriff who always said, “It could have been worse.”
No matter what happened, the old sheriff always had the same answer: “It could have been worse.”
…One day, two deputies in the Sheriff’s Office answered an emergency call at a farmhouse.
When they walked in, they found the nude bodies of a man and a woman in the bedroom. They had been shot to death.
When they went to the living room, they found the body of a man with a gun at his side.
“No doubt about it,” one deputy said to the other. “This was a double murder and suicide.
This guy came home and found his wife in bed with somebody else and shot them both. Then he shot himself.”
“You’re right,” the other deputy replied. “Double murder and suicide. But I’ll bet you when the sheriff gets here he’s going to say ‘it could have been worse.”
“No way. How could it be worse? There are three people in the house, and all of them have been shot to death. It couldn’t be worse. You’re on.”
About that time, the old sheriff arrived at the scene.
He walked into the bedroom and saw the two nude bodies.
He then walked into the living room and saw the man on the floor with the gun by his side.
“No doubt about it,” the sheriff said, shaking his head. “It was a double murder and suicide.
This guy came home and found his wife in bed with somebody else and shot them both. Then he shot himself.”
After hesitating for a moment, the old sheriff looked his deputies squarely in the eyes. “But, you know,” he said, “it could have been worse.”
The deputy who had lost the bet jumped up and shouted, “Sheriff, how could it have been worse? There are three people in this farmhouse, and all three of them are dead. It couldn’t have been worse?!?”
“Yes it could,” the sheriff retorted. “You see that guy there on the floor? If he had come home yesterday, that would be me in there in that bed!”
My thanks to Danny for allowing me to raid his Facebook: Danny Kemp
About Daniel Kemp
Daniel Kemp, ex-London police officer, mini-cab business owner, pub tenant and licensed London taxi driver never planned to be a writer, but after his first novel –The Desolate Garden — was under a paid option to become a $30 million film for five years until distribution became an insurmountable problem for the production company what else could he do?
In May 2018 his book What Happened In Vienna, Jack? became a number one bestseller on four separate Amazon sites: America, UK, Canada, and Australia.
Although it’s true to say that he mainly concentrates on what he knows best; murders laced by the mystery involving spies, his diverse experience of life shows in the short stories he writes, namely: Why? A Complicated Love, and the intriguing story titled The Story That Had No Beginning.
He is the recipient of rave reviews from a prestigious Manhattan publication, been described as –the new Graham Green — by a managerial employee of Waterstones Books, for whom he did a countrywide tour of signing events, and he has appeared on ‘live’ television in the UK.
A selection of books by Daniel Kemp
One of the reviews for A Desolate Garden
This is a well-written but exceedingly complex book. Set in the world of espionage, international intrigue, and political manipulations, it follows an investigation by Harry Patterson into the murders of his father and brother. Judith Meadows has been assigned to aid him, and the two of them make quite a pair. Their testy relationship adds some flavor to an otherwise cerebral read.
What do I mean by that? Between sections of expertly written dialog, the book is expository, relaying multiple family histories and the political machinations of individuals and countries on the world stage, primarily the espionage between England and the Soviet Union.
The research is impressive. I can’t say that enough. So is the tangled plot and eventual reveal. There are a lot of secrets. There are also a lot of characters, and it’s important to keep them straight. Pay attention as it’s easy to get lost.
For readers interested in fast-paced James Bond- style action, this book may not be for you since there is no action at all. For readers who love realistic espionage, historical fiction, or a deep dive into 20th-century English-Soviet behind-the-scenes manipulations, this book may be the perfect read.
Read the reviews and buy the books also in audio: Amazon UK – And : Amazon US – follow Daniel: Goodreads – Website: Author Danny Kemp – Facebook: Books by Daniel – Twitter:@danielkemp6
Thanks for visiting and I know Danny would love your feedback..Have a good weekend…Sally
Lol, Sally and Daniel! Yep, it could’ve been worse!
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Definitely lol.. hugsx
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Hilarious. Thanks for the laughs, Daniel and Sally. Hugs
Reblogged on Improvisation – “The Art of Living”
https://williampriceking.tumblr.com/
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Happy to hear that William.. enjoy what’s left of the weekend..hugsx
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Thank you for that, William.
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Reblogged this on Daniel Kemp and commented:
Here’s another bout of laughter delivered to your page.
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Thanks again for letting me share Danny..♥
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That’s an absolute pleasure, Sally, and may I once again thank you for your support.
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♥
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Lol, loved the joke and every meme. Maybe that Texas handwash sign should be a thing, lol ❤
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Definitely… and a marg to go with it…just as extra insurance..♥♥
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You got it Sal. A marg goes good with everything. ❤ xx
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♥♥
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Thank you, Sally, and thank you, everyone. Has it really been a year?
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It has Danny.. doesn’t time fly when you are having fun..hugs xx
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Well, these funnies could have been worse! 😀 😀 😀
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Lol.. xxx
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😀
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Lol – All so close to these crazy times. Thank you Daniel and Sally! Enjoy a wonderful weekend, with a lot of sun! Michael xx
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Thanks very much Michael and crazy times they are… enjoy your weekend too…hugsxx
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Thank you, Sally! :-)) xx
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So funny. Thanks, Daniel. I love the kid taped to the floor, and the Facebook health expert. Lol. And thanks, Sally, for sharing my review of Daniel’s book. He knows his espionage.
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Thanks Diana.. and I always enjoy sharing great reviews…have a lovely weekend.♥
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you’re right, that last one is a classic!
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Thanks Jim..have a good weekend..x
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Thanks for the happiness boost!
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Delighted you enjoyed Alex.. have a great weekend.. hugsx
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Fabulous! Thanks, Daniel and Sally!
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Thanks Olga..hugsx
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Thank you, Sally and Daniel.
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Thanks John..hugsx
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Love the Carbolic Soap, and ‘Could be Worse’ is wonderful. Thanks for the laughs.
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I love the working mother picture, Danny and Sally. That is one lucky Sherriff to be sure. Have a wonderful Friday evening.
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You too Robbie…glad you enjoyed hugsxx
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LOL. That’s all I have to say … and have a happy weekend!
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Thanks Christa and you too.. x
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