Smorgasbord Laughter Lines Extra – November 11th 2021 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Blonde Men and Holiday Offer

Author Daniel Kemp entertains us again with his funnies from: Danny Kemp .. Always a place to find funnies and jokes to cheer you up… plus some satirical political commentary on politicians at home and abroad.

And to finish off

Sorry, but I need to moan!

I experienced the WORST customer service yesterday at a store in town. I don’t want to mention the name of the store because I’m not sure how I’m going to proceed.

Yesterday I bought something from this store. I paid cash for it. I took it home and found out it didn’t work. So this morning, less than 24 hours later I took it back to the store and asked if I could get a refund. The girl in the store told me “NO” and very rudely too, I asked if I could exchange it for something else in the store instead, again this person said “NO.”

I asked to speak with a manager as, by now, I was really not very happy and I explained that I had just bought the item, got it home and it didn’t work. The manager just smiled and told me to my face that I was—“OUT OF LUCK. No refund. No FREE replacement.” Grrrrrrrrr.

I’ll tell you what… I am NEVER buying another Lottery Ticket from there again..

Generous offer…

Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter, flight for 4 people?! I’m still looking for 2 more people to join us. We leave early Saturday (October 17) morning from Glasgow and will fly to Loch Ness where we will have breakfast and then on a yacht for lunch.

Then we’ll do a flight to Ireland and returning to Loch Ness for dinner, then fly back home.
If interested please pm me.

Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can’t go…

My thanks to Danny for allowing me to raid his Facebook: Danny Kemp

About Daniel Kemp

Daniel Kemp, ex-London police officer, mini-cab business owner, pub tenant and licensed London taxi driver never planned to be a writer, but after his first novel –The Desolate Garden — was under a paid option to become a $30 million film for five years until distribution became an insurmountable problem for the production company what else could he do?

In May 2018 his book What Happened In Vienna, Jack? became a number one bestseller on four separate Amazon sites: America, UK, Canada, and Australia.

Although it’s true to say that he mainly concentrates on what he knows best; murders laced by the mystery involving spies, his diverse experience of life shows in the short stories he writes, namely: Why? A Complicated Love, and the intriguing story titled The Story That Had No Beginning.

He is the recipient of rave reviews from a prestigious Manhattan publication, been described as –the new Graham Green — by a managerial employee of Waterstones Books, for whom he did a countrywide tour of signing events, and he has appeared on ‘live’ television in the UK.

A selection of books by Daniel Kemp

A review for Once I Was A Soldier

billierosie 5.0 out of 5 stars Once I was a Soldier by Daniel Kemp Reviewed in the United Kingdom

Once I was a Soldier by Daniel Kemp is the second in a trilogy that opened with What Happened in Vienna Jack? Once I was a Soldier picks up the narrative some 20 years later. It’s not obvious, at first, because the characters seem new, but if you have read the first book, you will realise, slowly, slowly that you have met these characters before.

This is a thriller of the highest quality. I’ve made the comparison between John le Carre and Daniel Kemp before. Both of these writers have agile, creative minds and both are experts in their chosen fields of espionage and the politics of the era.

The theme of Once I was a Soldier is power. People crave power, even if they already have it, they are greedy and want more. Those in power are afraid of losing it and guard it jealously.

The novel opens with an abuse of power. Melissa Iverson has inherited a vast fortune. Her lawyer reads her the contents of her Father’s Will. Her Father has made provisions for his two elderly, much loved servants, leaving them a house in which to live out their days. But the clause isn’t water tight and Melissa demands that the elderly couple are thrown out of their home immediately. This abuse of power drives the narrative.

This is some of the finest erotica I’ve read. The writer lulls the reader into believing that sex and wealth are so high on the agenda that we are reading a narrative that lures us into the sexually determined world of Jackie Collins, or Shirley Conran.

And neither is this Agatha Christie, there’s no room for Miss Marple here. There is a change of mood and pace that is shocking. We stumble into a gritty, dark world…the characters with whom we thought were safe and dependable are not what they have seemed. Who are their masters? Who truly, ultimately has power? We don’t know and for the most part we never find out, we can only guess. but the final pages bring us back to the narrative…it is shocking, leaving us in no doubt that evil really does exist.

If you like your reading to be challenging, if you like the mystery of where Daniel Kemp is taking you..be warned, Once I was a Soldier is disturbing, but you will enjoy the journey.

Read the reviews and buy the books also in audio: Amazon UK – And : Amazon US – follow Daniel: Goodreads – Website: Author Danny Kemp – Facebook: Books by Daniel – Twitter:@danielkemp6

Thanks for visiting and I know Danny would love your feedback..Have a good weekend…Sally

 

43 thoughts on “Smorgasbord Laughter Lines Extra – November 11th 2021 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Blonde Men and Holiday Offer

  1. I laughed out loud at the horse/cannabis one and passed it to my husband by way of explanation. He’s still laughing! The missing posts ran a close second. Many thanks for brightening a dark day. xx

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Pingback: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – 7th- 13th November – Remembrance, Anniversary, 1982 Hits, Book reviews, Guest Bloggers, Health and Laughter | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

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