Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Guest Post – #Life – I Wish I Knew Then What I Know Now! by D.G. Kaye

I am sure like me, there have been times when you have wondered what difference might have been made to your life, if your younger self had been gifted with the experience and knowledge you have accumulated over the years.

I invited several friends from the writing community to share their thoughts on this subject which I am sure you will enjoy as much as I did.

Today my friend and fellow collaborator here on Smorgasbord, D.G. Kaye (Debby Gies) shares her thoughts on the prompt.

I Wish I Knew Then by Debby Gies

Thank you, Sally for inviting me here today to share my thoughts on, I Wish I Knew Then What I Know Now. This was an interesting question because of course, hindsight is always 20/20.

I’ve lived my life learning from life – life lessons. These are experiences in life that we could never imagine until we’ve lived through them, that’s why they’re called life lessons. This makes it somewhat like a trick question because if we didn’t experience something yet, we’d have never been able to learn from it, so hence, that’s my answer, it’s really not possible to know then what we know now, but wish, yes. We didn’t know any better or different then that nothing is stagnant, the world is always changing. We followed in the direction that life led us, we experienced and then we learned.

Don’t we all wish that in some of our most glorious times in our heydays, that we knew then that those days could quite possibly become some of the best years of our lives? Did we take those days for granted? Did we think that the good times would always continue to roll unknowing the times would change and quite possibly there may be leaner years? I know that I just took it for granted that the good things would remain and continue to get better. I wish I knew that our accumulated abundance in life was never anything to take for granted, that nothing is permanent, and that we should always keep alert and protective over everything we’d worked hard to attain.

But I suppose back then, as we live in the now and endure new struggles, we didn’t consider that those days of past would become the very days we often long for in the now as this world becomes more difficult to exist in.

I wish I knew, what feels like not so long ago, that I was living in my glory days without struggles of today – not much to worry about, giving not much concern to the coming years, which ultimately became leaner and less. Less tolerance, less love, less acceptance, less understanding, less brotherly love and that it could possibly become more difficult to live with the lesser of these things taken for granted back then as we under-estimated change in the world, thinking life would get even better with progress instead of going backwards.

I wish I knew then that my thinking that the harder we worked and saved for our retirement years would undoubtedly add fruit to our baskets if we saved and invested smart like the generation before us, was no guarantee and offered a false sense of security.

I wish I knew then as we thought we were prepared with our future plans and our false sense of security that the ‘powers that be’ would be making the rich get richer, and big corporations and greed would become as powerful as governments while diminishing the middle class’s ability to stay afloat ( let alone those who already lived back then, and still, in poverty levels) and could possibly threaten our financial futures, and that flying high in the gravy days by no means was any guarantee for tomorrow’s riches.

But as I watch the world change and devolve in so many ways, I can look back on the errors of my ways and I’ve learned to adjust my sails and go with the wind and not against it while keeping my eyes wide open, so I don’t have to say in the future again – I wish I knew then. But, no doubts, I may quite possibly be fooled again and have to repeat those same words – I Wish I Knew Then.

Those Good Old Golden Days of My Free Spirited Twenties

Those were the days of gold, even though then, I didn’t know they were.
The only thing I had to worry about was not getting pregnant.
A decent clerk job with a commission made a half decent living for a single girl at the time.
One could still be stylish if she had a weakness for designer clothes and shoes not on a champagne budget, like I did. Friends in high places.
The days when I could dress to the nines, avoid standing in nightclub lines as the bouncer graciously lifted the satin rope to let me pass inside to my usual Thursday and Saturday night haunt.
The days when parking was free, a glass of white Chardonnay was three bucks and change.
A five-dollar bill was all I needed in my wallet to buy my first drink and leave the rest for the tip, until one of the regulars in the club would show up, invite me to their table, and buy the rest of my drinks.
I had many friends in that club, the regulars as we were known.
Some were there to hunt women, some were there to be hunted. And some like myself, just went to dance and have fun.
Never breaking her policy that she never left the club with anyone other than the girlfriend she came in with.
Those were the days of gold.

©DGKaye2022

My thanks to Debby for sharing her thoughts with us and giving us something to think about. Our journey through life is complex and not always under our control and subject to change and as Debby sometimes we have to adjust our sails and go with the wind.

About D.G. Kaye (Debby Gies)

Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.

D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.

When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.

“I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences. I write raw and honest about my own experiences, hoping through my writing, that others can relate and find that there is always a choice to move from a negative space, and look for the positive.”

Quotes:

“Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”

“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”

Books by D.G. Kaye

One of the reviews for Words We Carry

Luv2read 5.0 out of 5 stars A gem of a book  Reviewed in the United States on January 3, 2021

What starts with the author’s explanation of why she wrote the book: namely to share negative experiences and obstacles in which self-esteem issues and insecurities when faced and dealt with blossom to learning self-love; this is a remarkable revolutionary read.

One I wish I would have read in my earlier teen years when I struggled with my own self-esteem issues. Self-perception baggage from wounded egos, what weighs us down, fester and damage the soul the author writes. So true. This is so well written that it’s not just an enlightening educational tool but a wonderful read from a woman not afraid to show her underbelly, huge heart, and she does it with much authenticity and talent. I resonated with so much of what she wrote in these enlightening pages, but what stands out the most is how I slid down the rabbit’s hole due to my desire to want to belong, to socially fit.

I suppose all of us who relate to this unfolding have a personal story of our own. Mine was rooted in a family dynamic that made it difficult for me to have friends to my home and consequently I missed out on social bonding that helps develop a strong sense of self. It wasn’t until later in life, in high school and university, that I encountered warm satisfying friendships. By then the damage was done. I just wish I had this book in my earlier years to have helped my younger, more formative self.

Thankfully, it’s never too late to unwind wounds and deepen self-love, which is another thing I found from this beautifully powerful read. In summation, let me say I am grateful I had this recommended to me by a friend, someone whose words I respect. This gem of a book did not disappoint. Highly recommend.  

Read all the reviews and buy the books: Amazon US – and: Amazon UK – follow Debby: Goodreads – Blog: D.G. Kaye Writer – About me: D.G. Kaye – Twitter: @pokercubster – Linkedin: D.G. Kaye – Facebook: D.G. Kaye – Instagram: D.G. Kaye – Pinterest: D.G. Kaye 

 

Thanks for joining us today and it would be great if you could share Debby’s post… thank you Sally.