Smorgasbord Funnies 2023 – Hosts Sally Cronin and Debby Gies – Petty Theft and paraprosdokians

Firstly, some funnies foraged from the web from Debby Gies – D.G. Writes is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.

 

My thanks to Debby  for expert foraging…

D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Debby’s latest post in her series Spiritual Awareness. Soul Mates and Life Partners

Now something from Sally’s Joke book archives….

This was sent to me by my sister Diana….

A paraprosdokian is a sentence or statement with an unexpected ending. It means “against expectations” in Greek.

Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen.

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

Hear about the new restaurant called Karma There’s no menu – you get what you deserve.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday, but couldn’t find any

What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.

I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case.

Is it ignorance or apathy that’s destroying the world today? I don’t know and I don’t care.

I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population? Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.

I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought: “That’s the last thing I need!”

Need an ark? I Noah guy.

You’re not completely useless, you can always serve as a bad example.

I broke my finger last week. On the other hand, I’m okay.

Don’t spell part backwards. It’s a trap.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

To the mathematician who thought of the idea of zero. Thanks for nothing!

Son: “Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?” Dad: “No sun.”

 We hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… thanks Sally and Debby.