Welcome to the update of posts that you might have missed from the week here on Smorgasbord.
I hope all is well with you. Quiet here except for the noise of the wind howling around the house and the six inch puddle stretching across the front of the house. I know I wished I had a swimming pool but clearly the genie was having an off day.
The garden birds have been having a tough time of it with the winds and driving rain making it difficult to fly, particularly for the small birds such as the sparrows and tits. I usually buy my birdseed and fat balls at the garden centre or at a push smaller packs as the supermarket but of course the centres have been shut since the New Year and the supermarket shelves are bare of both seed and other products. One store has at least got some sunflower hearts and I have mixed that with sultanas and cooked brown rice.. They can at least digest that easily and it has nutrients for them.. The sunflower hearts provide the good fats and protein.
I have taken to put some on the ground as well as on our platform feeder and hanging baskets and hopefully they will get enough nourishment.
They are staying in the thick hedge in our back garden but when I got out (dressed in full wet gear) there is a sudden chorus of song and I can feel hundreds of eyes on me… as soon as the back door closes they are in the feeders and on the ground which is encouraging.
Anyway.. on with the posts from the week and as always my gratitude to William Price King, D.G. Kaye andCarol Taylor for their terrific contributions and to you for visiting, sharing and commenting.. it keeps me motivated..
The prompt words are Loose and Tight and I have selected Detached and Inflexible.
Here is my Butterfly Cinquain…
Fate’s Voice
Detached
the mind wanders
to explore the ‘what ifs’
of decisions made long ago
in life
designed to be inflexible
without the give and take
to allow fate
its voice.
I wrote this article in 2018 as a guest post on the blog of USA Today Bestselling Romance author Jacquie Biggar
Not everyone celebrates Valentine’s Day and I believe that romance is something that infuses every day of a relationship, but if receiving a card, or some roses, reminds someone of how much they are loved, then this is a good day.
Romance is one of the elements of our lives which is universal, and much sort after. People often ask what the secret to a happy relationship is… darned if I know. All I can offer you is some of the little things I have come to appreciate over the last 50 odd years of dating and relationships. Make that 58 as I had a crush on Peter Birch at primary school age ten which resulted in my first broken heart!
Because many of you who are reading this are writers, I thought you might be interested in a few statistics on the billion-dollar-a-year Romance book industry via Romance Writers
The annual total sales of romance novels per year is in excess of a billion dollars.
Romance novel share of the U.S. fiction market is approx 34%.
82% of romance readers are women.
84 % of romance writers are women.
Average age is 35-39.
What interested me about these statistics is that romance is a hot ticket item. It is also evident that romantic stories are very much sought after by women, but clearly not as high on the list for men. Something that those who feel men are sometimes not as romantic as they might be, would find interesting!
Another statistic is that the average age of those seeking out romance stories is between the ages of 35-39… which begs the question… Do women in their 40s, 50s, 60s give up on romance, or they are simply not catered for by the romance writers?
Like most young girls of my generation, I was infused with the myths surrounding love and romance at an early age. Between fairy tales and my mother’s desire to make the goal of romance clear cut in my mind, I surmised that at some point a Prince Charming, on a white horse, would sweep into my life, whisk me off my feet, and we would ride off into a future of bliss, children and Happy Ever After.
I was encouraged to take the available wisdom to heart, and with hopes and dreams of my own, embarked on my own dating adventures. The trouble with ingrained expectations is that they are not always as revered by others, particularly the opposite sex.
However, after some false starts, at the age of 20, a more mature Prince Charming of 26 did arrive, in uniform and driving a classic American sports car. It seemed that expectations had been met and exceeded, and it was crowned with a spectacular wedding with matriarchal approval on both sides. We drove off into the sunset with clanging tin cans behind the steed… which proved to be tolling bells of doom!
Trouble is what you see is not always what you get! And when compounded with differing expectations of what a relationship is supposed to be, and a lack of commitment of one of the participants, things tend to fall apart. After four years, some interesting life lessons, and an expensive legal intervention which took three years, I finally managed to extricate myself with a vow to never marry again.
Then wouldn’t you know it, six months later, into my life walked a softly-spoken, unassuming guy who took me out on a date and asked me to marry him before the night was over. Five weeks later, without any ceremony, and with just our parents in attendance, we exchanged rings and our own vows.
The last 40 years have taught me that romance is not one-size fits all, is unique to two people who love each other, and is not always about red roses and chocolates.
Some of the elements that spell romance for me.
As Jeremy Taylor quoted ‘Love is Friendship set on Fire’. Of course there is that initial, and amazing firework display of hormonally induced physical attraction, which then evolves over the years into a familiarity that can still be breathtaking. However, without the essential elements of like-mindedness, shared moral code, sense of humour, and appreciation of another’s unique personality, the fire of romance slowly dies down to embers.
An analogy I often use for romance between two people, is that it is like an extended ballroom dance that flows and whirls with two partners in perfect sync. Always staying within the limits of the dance floor, allowing other styles come into play, with fiery tangos and playful sambas as the tempo of the music changes. Even when there is a momentary loss of connection, there is a coming together again, and the dance always finishes in a firm embrace.
Whilst there may be the occasional extravagant gesture when a special event warrants it, mostly it is the small things that keep romance alive and flourishing.
Red roses are wonderful, and we all love to receive a bouquet on Valentine’s Day or an anniversary. But it is the odd flower brought in from the garden and laid on a breakfast tray, a small tree planted in the garden that blossoms every spring, or the paper flower, misshapen and oddly coloured that appears by a bedside, that really help to keep romance alive.
Romance is waking up on every birthday to find cards hand-made from images of sea, sunflowers, cats and dogs, golden sunsets with handwritten verses inside that come from the heart. It is also those few minutes on your wedding anniversary when you sit silently, holding hands and remembering that special day and the people who are no longer there to share the memories with you.
True romance flourishes when you are unwell and scared and a strong hand holds yours and a voice close to your ear, tells you that it will be alright, that you are safe. It is when you suffer a loss and cry together and heal together. It is when you walk through the door and someone says, ‘hi love, how was your day?’
Romance is when the last words before you go to sleep are ‘I love you’
Romance does exist after 40 years old, whatever the statistics might say.
Romance and love go hand in hand, and as I watch very old people together, you can tell the ones who still adore and respect each other. It is easy to still see that spark and twinkle in the eyes, the small touches of a hand or brush of lint from a shoulder. That unity has been welded from years of life, laughter, sadness, joy, disappointment, excitement and love. Thousands of cups of tea, breakfasts in bed, dances in the kitchen, date nights, holding hands in the movies and vigils by a sickbed, have gone into the rich tapestry that is romance. There might be a faded red rose pressed between the pages of a diary, or a diamond ring that comes out on special occasions, but it is these small daily gestures that will have kept the romance alive and will continue to do so long after one or both of them dies.
Romance is also about the things we don’t do in a relationship.
We don’t belittle someone we love in public and then say ‘But you know I love you’.
We don’t bully them and then say we are doing it ‘Because you know I love you.’
We don’t marry who we believe is Prince Charming or the fairy princess, and then set about changing them by saying ‘You know it is because I love you.’
We don’t take the actions of those we love for granted, and saying ‘thank you’ for a meal, a wardrobe full of clean clothes or for being a great mum or dad, goes a long way to keep romance alive.
Romance is not about making someone happy or expecting them to make you happy. Your happiness is your responsibility and choice. Putting the onus for your happiness on someone else is a very quick way to lose them.
Here is one of my favourite poems on romance from Elizabeth Barrett Browning courtesy ofThe Poem Hunter
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of Being and ideal Grace. I love thee to the level of every day’s Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight. I love thee freely, as men strive for Right; I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise. I love with a passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints, — I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.
As a writer I enjoy creating romantic relationships across the ages and you can find my short story and poetry collections, novels and non-fiction books with recent reviews:Here
Our hope
springs eternal
each day with the sun rise
and when the goddess moon shines down
at night.
Hope is also found in people
who gift love and kindness
to us and to
others.
Welcome to the weekly round up with posts you might have missed on Smorgasbord.
Thanks for taking time to drop by and I hope you are having a good weekend. Things are much the same here so nothing new to report. I am however in full writing mode so spending a little less time on social media except for topping and tailing the day.
A warm welcome back to William Price King after his summer break and I am sure you will enjoy his first post in the new season.
Carol Taylor was also here with her A- Z and this week she has some amazing foods, methods and recipes beginning with the letter ‘Q’.
The first guest in the new Author Spotlight last Sunday was Harmony Kent who shared her remarkable and challenging journey to being the person she is today.
Coming up tomorrow – D.G. Kaye shares how her ingenuity and perseverance landed her a fabulous job that was career and life changing.
I hope that you enjoy the posts from the week and as always thank you for your support that keeps me motivated.. Sally.
Cholesterol plays a vital role in a number of key functions within the bodyyet it has been demonized and come under attack for the last twenty years. For the majority of the population, heart disease and coronary heart disease is lifestyle related and can be reversed by making changes to diet and lifestyle.
Thanks very much for dropping in today and I hope you have enjoyed catching up with the posts.. and that you will join me again next week.. thanks Sally.
Welcome to the round up with post you might have missed on Smorgasbord this week.
I hope everybody is doing well.. I am sure that like me you are watching the headlines and keeping up do date with not just your own country’s progress with the pandemic but also on a worldwide basis. At this point all we can do is remain safe and avoid covidiots that seem to think social distancing and masks do not apply to them.
On a positive note...I have made a few tweaks to new book releases from August 26th that I hope will increase exposure for the authors concerned. If you are already in the Cafe and Bookstore you new book announcement will be added to the Cafe Updates on Monday, Wednesday and Fridays. I hope that the fact that there are four authors in the post, it will generate more views for your new book. Over a period of a couple of weeks they usually generate an average of 150 views and multiple shares on Twitter and Facebook.
If you are a new author to the Cafe and Bookstore I will post the usual introductory promotion with bio etc.
This is the latest way to share your work and I now have some wonderful stories of defining moments in the lives of authors in the Cafe and Bookstore. It would be wonderful to share your stories too so perhaps you could read the post and read my story so you can see how it will look. The series begins the last Sunday of August and I am now booking for the second week in October.. Look forward to hearing from you.
If you missed them here are some posts from my contributors this week that you might like to head over and read.
Debby Gies interviews Adele Marie Park about her childhood on the island of
Rousay part of the Orkney Isles where she encountered tales Finn Folk,
Selkies and mermaids.. Adele has just released her latest book, Sea Dragon – Wisp II and shares what is coming next. As always Debby’s questions are tailored to her guest and the interview makes for interesting reading.D.G Kaye interviews Adele Marie Park
Carol Taylor with her Saturday Snippets with posts ranging from Bees and their importance to our environment, Lemon Meringue Pie, National Afternoon Tea Week, Music from Jimi Hendrix, Rooftop farms, removing hooks from shark’s mouths and respect for those who died during the holocaust.. As you can see a varied and interesting post.. please head over. Saturday Snippets with Carol Taylor
Time to catch up with the posts from the week here on Smorgasbord.. thank you for all your support and also to Debby Gies and Silvia Todescofor their wonderful contributions this week. William Price King is back with a brand new Music Column on September 1st.
This week for Colleen Chesebro’s Weekly Tanka Challenge 190 Colleen has given us the prompts ‘Circled and Squared‘ and I have chosen the synonyms ‘Embraced and Balanced’ for my Butterfly Cinquain.
Embraced
Embraced
and protected
within their mother’s arms
babies view the world in safety
and calm.
Supported then by loving hands
balanced on two small feet
first steps are made
in life.
Welcome to the round up of posts that you might have missed this week on Smorgasbord.
It is finally a lovely sunny day and I intend to take full advantage and be out in the garden most of the day.
I have finally given myself a very good talking to and put into action a long overdue plan this week. It involves books and reviews and my unsuccessful efforts to whittle my TBR list down effectively. I was only reading at night and it was five pages and then lights out so to speak. Something needed to be done.
I now have a mandatory reading hour in the afternoon either in the garden or in our sitting room if the weather is not warm enough. I have finished two books this week instead of the usual one, and I feel far less guilty about the books sitting their so patiently waiting for my attention.
I am delighted that the new Children’s Cafe and Bookstore is going well with 5 new authors joining and you will meet them in promotions over the next week. One of the problems for children’s authors, especially with picture books for younger children, is getting reviews. In part because many children’s books are given as gifts and parents may feel that there is no where for them to share a review if they have not bought from Amazon or other book sellers online.
This is why it is important to have a Goodreads author page as a Children’s author so that reviews can be posted worldwide and without having been bought.
Having said that, if the parents or grandparents don’t know that they can put a review on Goodreads, it is not as useful as it might be.
If you are an author of children’s books could I suggest that at the back of your books you put a short note asking for reviews and providing the link to https://www.goodreads.com/ and explaining that it is also a wonderful resource for other children’s books, often at special prices.
In the coming weeks I am going to be putting together some specific children’s book promotions to encourage reviews and it would be great if you help spread the word. This includes a children’s review watering hole…where even if the books are not in the Children’s Cafe and Bookstore, reviews can be shared and I will add the blurb and the links to the books. The promotion post for this new series is scheduled for Tuesday at 18.00 UK time.
I cannot imagine my life without books and my love of reading began at age four. It is such an important skill to have in life and children’s authors deserve all the support we can give them.
And on the subject of reviews...I was delighted this afternoon to receive a wonderful 5* review from Marjorie Mallon for Life’s Rich Tapestry..If you have time I would be so pleased if you would head over and read in full..thanks Sally.
Here are the posts from the weekand as always a huge thank you to the guest writers for their amazing contributions.. this week William Price King and Carol Taylor. And to you for dropping in, liking, commenting and sharing the posts, the support is very much appreciated.
We live on the Wexford coast and our harbour has small boat and some larger fishing vessels.. There is always something going on, even in the winter when the seagulls use the boats wintering in the inner harbour as roosts… This requires some deep cleaning once the spring comes around again! This anchor is in pride of place and prompts the question.. what happened to the boat it was attached to?
Thank you for dropping by today.. your feedback is always welcome. Sally
Time continues to pass rapidly despite the turmoil in the world, and suddenly it is Saturday again. Welcome to the posts that you might have missed on Smorgasbord during the week.
Something to think about
I am so tempted to switch off from the news headlines and retreat into my rural sanctuary here in Ireland and ignore the world and its desperation. But, I am part of the world, as we all are, and our words and actions have consequences, especially today with the immediacy of our online contributions. It feels like a powder keg with a lit fuse coiling around the globe, as people take to the streets and their knees, in response to actions that even 10 years ago would have gone unnoticed except for those swept up in the events.
In our modern age of mobile phones with cameras, social media and a growing frustration with what is seen as archaic methods of out of date policing and government, it is unwise for anyone in power to assume that their actions will be swept under the carpet, and that there will not be consequences. Having said that, it also applies to the minority who are taking advantage of the situation by looting and carrying out acts of violence on innocent bystanders and businesses.
Fear and lack of leadership has led to disproportionate reactions from the authorities which has just fueled the situation. Instead of talking and reaching a consensus on a way forward, this reaction is destined to be repeated, unless radical changes are made. It is however, heartwarming, to see that even under such stress, many of those behind the shields have taken to a knee and shared their solidarity with the peaceful protestors.
For those protesting peacefully, I am with you all the way. It is not just the approach to colour in the media, by the authorities, and in the community, it is about developing a whole new approach to education, health care, and employment that currently creates such a divide in our nations. This is not just in the USA but also in countries in Europe where inequality still thrives across the different cultures and sectors of society.
We seem to have forgotten that under our skin colour, beneath our beliefs and beyond our different languages, we all share the same physiology and as human beings, we all have inalienable rights.
One of the most basic rights should be that our fellow man will look out for us when we are being persecuted.
And now time for the posts from the week…and thank you for all the support that I am very grateful for. As I am for the contributors who add such flavour, knowledge and humour to the blog each week.
And to start off another new book marketing series ... a follow on from Share an Extract of a Previous Book... now it is the turn of your most recent book. Full details in the post and an example of how it will look.
I write southern historical fiction and local history. The novel I'm writing is set in the Carolinas in the 1760s. I blog about my journey as a writer and a reader.
