As you know I do like to pass on pearls of wisdom and marriage is one of those topics that everyone tends to talk about! Here is part one of some snippets I have found to share with you.
Marriage!
Grooms, once you get married remember that when you have a discussion with your future wife, always get the last two words in: “Yes, dear.”
What is the penalty for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.
The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are “I apologize” and “You are right.”
I need to start paying closer attention to stuff. Found out today my wife and I have separate names for the cat.
At every party there are two kinds of people: those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.
I always wanted to marry Mrs. Right, but I didn’t know her first name was “Always”.
Arguing with your wife/husband is a lot like trying to read the Terms of Use on the internet. In the end, you just give up and go ‘I agree.’
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” And the husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice it.”
Thank you for joining us today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face.. Debby and Sally.
And if you are looking for inspiration for your next novel’s title.
A Clifftop Tragedy by Eileen Dover. A Whole Lot of Cats by Kitt N. Caboodle Animal Scents by Farrah Mones Cheating on His Wife by Izzy Backyet Confessions Of A Gold Digger by Emile Ticket Yellow River by I.P.Daily, Russian Lion Tamer by Claude Buttox Carpet Laying by Walter Wall Eating Garlic by Y.I Malone. Pain and Sorrow by Ann Quish The Insomniac by Eliza Wake The Scent of a Man by Jim Nasium Wait for me by Isa Cummin. Willie Win by Betty Wont.
Thanks for dropping in and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.
A writer comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is standing outside. “What happened, honey?” the man asks.
“Oh, John, it was terrible,” she weeps. “I was cooking, the phone rang. It was your agent. Because I was on the phone, I didn’t notice the stove was on fire. It went up in second. Everything is gone. I nearly didn’t make it out of the house. Poor Fluffy is–”
“Wait, wait. Back up a minute,” The man says. “My agent called?”
Pen names
Neither a Borrower ……………Nora Lender Bee
Holmes Does it Again ………..Scott Linyard
Cloning …………………………….Ima Dubble
Inflammation, Please ………….Arthur Itis
House Construction ……………Bill Jerome Home
Leo Tolstoy ……………………..Warren Peace
The French Chef ……………….Sue Flay
Why Cars Stop ………………….M. T. Tank
Aspirations
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define great, he said, “I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!”
He now works for WordPress writing updates to the Classic Editor!
Thanks for joining us today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.
As many of you already know that D.G. Kaye’s husband passed away on April 7th and our thoughts are with her during this sad time.
Debby will be continuing with the Realm of Relationship Columnbut rather than have the pressure of a deadline, we thought we might share the first posts of the series which began in January 2020 every Monday to bring new readers to the blog up to speed
Relationships – Know when it’s time to go – When giving becomes one-sided
Welcome back to The Realms of Relationships. In this edition, I’m going to talk more about friendships. I talked about keeping friendships healthy in my previous post. In this post, I’ll share some of the flags that indicate when friends may be taking advantage of us.
Friendships are special to us because they are the people we choose to let into the most personal and intimate part of our lives, the people we trust most. But sometimes in our lifetime of relationships and friendships we may realize that a certain friendship becomes all give and no get back. Today we’re going to take a look at some of the signs that tell us that a friendship we may have with someone is not as fulfilling as it once may have been, how to attempt to repair, and how to decide if it’s time to sever ties.
Friends are those we permit into our personal spaces and hold dear to us. Friends are the ones we share common bonds with, share our world, our homes and often our hearts with. Friends are ones we can rely on for uplifting, favors, companionship, and the ones who have our backs. Do something to betray any of these bonds, it puts a dent into a friendship, and if we let misgivings escalate without confronting our friend about issues bothering us, or better yet, if we have confronted a friend over an issue and they tend to blow it off or ignore our concerns, consider petty, it may be time to re-evaluate that friendship.
As with everything that works smooth in life, there is balance. We take the good with the bad in stride and go about life. Sometimes there are obstacles we learn to work around, sometimes the obstacles must be confronted in order to resolve issues to restore an even balance. If the balance of a friendship begins to teeter, yet one party of the friendship doesn’t see it, someone must alert that person that more effort must be put into that relationship or it’s going to fizzle out. When one party is doing all the giving and supporting and there’s nothing in return – giving back, this is not a friendship. Make sure you’re not doing all the giving and being sucked into an energy vampire sucking relationship.
As a lover and not a fighter, I require peace in all my relationships. I’m a passionate person who cares about all people. I’m also a great communicator, which I learned to become as I’ve spent most of my life observing people and their behavior. If I detect an imbalance or a missing ingredient within a close friendship, I’m going to bring it up for discussion so we can get to the root of a problem to find resolution to continue on with the friendship, hopefully, strengthening the bond once the imbalance is corrected. But what if the other party doesn’t see our side or perhaps thinks we’re making too much out of something insignificant? Or, what if that person is completely blind to a troublesome situation and what if we become tired of rehashing the same issues that never seem to change? Are we just supposed to sit back and live with the lumpy situation, continuing to make excuses to pardon that friend from their faults, or can we keep making excuses to not be available for them? That becomes our decision. But for me, I learned a few relationships ago, when you become a doormat, it may be time to leave.
My Story
It wasn’t the first time I had to lay a friendship to rest. It happened maybe 3 times in my life when I decided it was time to part ways with someone who I’d considered a good friend but realized I was doing all the ‘friendy’ work. But leaving became easier to do with each friend because as the years progressed, I’d learned better to stand up for myself and to not be so easily roped in by people’s antics. Being an empath makes the process doubly hard because my whole life I allowed myself to get sucked into people’s drama because I felt sorry for them. Sure, they may not have been adding anything of value to our friendship at the time, but they were lonely, had a lot of bad breaks from life, and sometimes it was just convenient to have someone to hang out with, which some of us think may be better than being alone – but no, it’s not. I finally learned that being alone without a sidekick was better than being used, taken for granted and not appreciated.
One relationship I ended with a friend almost three decades ago was a smart choice. Amy was a friend I’d met within my circle of my closest oldest friends. I kind of inherited her as when we met through mutual friends, we were both single at the time and lived close to one another, which made it too convenient for her to pop over – a lot.
Amy ‘dropped’ by my place lots – especially when she was in between dating her ex- boyfriend and her ex -ex- boyfriend. I got to listen to the whining and complaining and felt compelled to come up with solutions to her problems. I got to cook her dinners, and rarely did I get to share anything about how I felt about things going on in my own life. And never would she ask.
Initially we were good company for one another – someone to have a meal with, go for a drink or watch a movie with. But after 2 years of it, my ear was getting too full of the ‘woe is me’ stories and zero growth in our relationship. Oh sure, after some time had passed, I did broach the subject with Amy, but I also grew to realize that whatever I’d discussed seemed to pass directly through both her ears, and she didn’t understand what being a real friend was. I call them fair-weather friends.
Fair- weather friends are those who come around or call when they have a need to be fulfilled – when it’s convenient for them. They aren’t necessarily bad people, more like self-centered, selfish, and often clueless when it comes to maintaining healthy relationships – romance or otherwise. These types of people will not go out of their way for someone else, usually have trouble in their romantic relationships for same reasons, and deny what they don’t like to hear.
Amy treated me like her personal Shrink or a sounding board for all her dilemmas – and there always seemed to be one with her. Me, always feeling as though it’s my duty to fix people, was kept in the vortex way too long.
Eventually, as that time in my life became a huge growth spurt in growing my self-esteem in both friendships and a crappy relationship I was in at the time, I realized then that it was time to unload the pressure of that relationship too. Without a fight or a phone call, I just slithered away. I first took her calls, but made myself consistently unavailable to her ‘drop over’ requests. Then eventually, I just stopped answering her calls and faded out. A good indicator I was right in doing so was that she made no attempts to further contact me or even questioning why I just cut her out. This was a confirmation it was time. There was no need to second-guess.
Friends who suck the life out of us are what I call energy sucking vampires. They are needy people who will swoop right in on us if we offer them a cushy nest. They are the ones who will ask for favors, visit and forget to leave, borrow things and never return them, and most known for draining our soul. And if you are an empath who constantly finds yourselves attracting these types of people, it’s time to become more aware of these behaviors and how much you will allow. Weigh out the pros and cons of a relationship. If you’re finding the con column getting a little too top heavy, it’s a good idea to consider cutting the ties.
If you find that you’ve discussed your feelings with your friend and they deny any actions you’ve pointed out, become defensive and/or accusatory as a lame defense, deny or blame you without admitting, apologizing, or ultimately, getting angry because you brought up the discussion, it’s pretty clear that your suspicions were right in the first place and it’s time to go. Empaths in particular, tend to let things drag on a little too long because we will do our utmost to keep from hurting anyone’s feelings, often taking the zings ourselves to keep the peace. But if it’s not peaceful, we need to leave.
There are no age limits, time limits, friend limits. You shouldn’t put a timeline on a friendship – meaning: Just because you’ve invested ‘x’ amount of years in a friendship and it doesn’t feel right anymore, doesn’t mean you must remain because you’ve put in the time. No. If you’ve put in the time and the friendship and it’s not growing or feeding you back in any way, it’s time to move on.
Do you have a sticky friendship experience you’d like to share here?
I’m a nonfiction memoir writer who writes about life, matters of the heart and women’s issues. My intent is to inspire others by sharing my stories about events I encountered, and the lessons that come along with them.
I love to laugh, and self-medicate with a daily dose of humor. When I’m not writing intimate memoirs, you’ll find me writing with humor in some of my other works and blog posts.
When I was a young child, I was very observant about my surroundings. Growing up in a tumultuous family life; otherwise known as a broken home, kept me on guard about the on-and-off-going status of my parents’ relationship. I often wrote notes, and journaled about the dysfunction I grew up in. By age seven I was certain I was going to grow up to be a reporter.
Well life has a funny way of taking detours. Instead, I moved away from home at eighteen with a few meager belongings and a curiosity for life. I finished university and changed careers a few times always striving to work my way up to managerial positions. My drive to succeed at anything I put my mind to led me to having a very colorful and eventful life.
Ever the optimist, that is me. I’ve conquered quite a few battles in life; health and otherwise, and my refusal to accept the word ‘No’, or to use the words ‘I can’t’, keeps me on a positive path in life.
I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences.
Quotes: “Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”
“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
When I’m not writing, I’m reading or quite possibly looking after some mundane thing in life. It’s also possible I may be on a secret getaway trip, as that is my passion—traveling. Find out more about D.G. Kaye: D.G. Kaye Writer
Books by D.G. Kaye
One of the recent reviews for Have Bags Will Travel
I read this as part of #ireadcanadian., @ireadcanadian #nowmorethanever.
This is such a hoot, what a laugh! Have Bags Will Travel is such an entertaining read which gives you an insight into D G Kaye’s character, her shopping obsession, packing troubles, germaphobia, and brushes with airport security. Enjoy her recollections on the glamour and glitz, her love to travel and a nostalgic aspect to it all.
Her friend Zan shares her shopaholic tendencies too. The two of them together… can you imagine? A red head, blonde explosion of zaniness! I love the part when they end up at Buckingham Palace and chat to a Beefeater, the royal guard and after which… it gets funnier by the moment.
Have Bags Will Travel gives a historical account of how much easier it used to be to take overstuffed baggage through airports in the good old days. Now, it seems that D G Kaye will resort to anything to get her shopping home. Zan and D G Kaye also travel to Paris and end up shopping for shoes! There are manmade toboggan rides in Muskoka, Canada. Trips to Venezuela: Margarita Island and Caracas with cousin Eileen. Las Vegas, Then and Now – gambling/casinos, fond memories of the author’s love of the desert.
Have Bags Will Travel is just what we need right now, a good giggle! There is also a section at the back of the book with Helpful Travel tips. A short, entertaining read. Highly recommended, especially for the shopoholics and travel enthusiasts in your life!
My thanks to Debby for taking on the challenge of exploring the complexity of relationships, and sharing strategies to improve the way we manage those important to us. As always your feedback is very welcome and Debby will respond to you comments when she can. Thanks Sally
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde is tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists, saying that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains how the game works: “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me, and visa-versa.” Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep. The chauvinistic lawyer figures that since his opponent is a blonde he will easily win the match, so he makes another offer:
“Okay, how about this “If you don’t know the answer you pay me only $5, but if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $50.” This catches the blonde’s attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, she agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?” The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches in to her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer. Now, it’s the blonde’s turn. She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?”
The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail. After over an hour, of searching for the answer he finally gives up. He wakes the blonde and hands her $50.
The blonde politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little frustrated, wakes the blonde and asks, “Well, so what IS the answer?”
Again without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
And if you have time to spare here is a selection of my Books and reviews
After getting all of Pope John Paul’s luggage loaded into the limo (and he doesn’t travel light), the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb.”Excuse me, Your Holiness,” says the driver, “Would you please take your seat so we can leave?”
“Well, to tell you the truth,” says the Pope, “they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I’d really like to drive today.”
“I’m sorry but I cannot let you do that. I’d lose my job! And what if something should happen?” protests the driver, wishing he’d never gone to work that morning.
“There might be something extra in it for you,” says the Pope.
Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.
“Please slow down, Your Holiness!!!” pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens. “Oh, dear God, I’m gonna lose my license,” moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.”I need to talk to the Chief,” he says to the dispatcher.
The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he’s stopped a limo going a hundred and five.”So bust him,” says the Chief.
“I don’t think we want to do that, he’s really important,” said the cop.
The Chief exclaimed,” All the more reason!”
“No, I mean really important,” said the cop.
The Chief then asked, “Who you got there, the Mayor?
“Cop: “Bigger.”
Chief: “Governor?”
Cop: “Bigger.”
“Well,” said the Chief, “Who is it?”
Cop: “I think it’s God!”
Chief: “What makes you think it’s God?”
Cop: “He’s got the Pope as a chauffeur!!”
Thanks for dropping in today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face.. thanks Debby and Sally.
Welcome back to my Travel Column where I share facts about some of the interesting places I’ve traveled, and some new places I’d like to travel to. I hope you’re all enjoying your summer. As we get ready to venture into a new season, there are plenty of beautiful places you will discover in this series, and some I too have yet to visit.
I’ve written about a few islands in the Caribbean so far, and today I want to continue the Caribbean theme and take us all to Saint Barthelemy, or the often abbreviated, St. Barths, the French prefer to call it, and, St. Barts in English. St. Barts is a small volcanic island, encircled by shallow reefs, and is one of four territories that make up what’s called the Leeward Islands, located in the northwest of the Caribbean Sea, lying approximately 22 miles southeast of St. Martin and just north of St. Kitts. The capital city of St Barts is Gustavia, named after a Swedish King. The other three islands part of these territories are: Martinique, French West Indies, and Guadeloupe.
St. Barts is a French-speaking island that is renowned as an elite destination most popular to the rich and famous, but certainly not limited to just the rich and famous. The island is most known for its beautiful beaches, luxury yachts and of course, designer boutiques and spectacular restaurants. St. Barts is considered one of the safest islands with very little to zero crime!
There are three methods of which to arrive in St. Barts. The first is truly geared toward the rich or famous, arrive by yacht, or take a ferry from another island. The other option is to fly into St. Martin and take a small prop plane a short 10 – minute flight into the St. Barts landing strip, most likely the method I would choose.
Check out the video below to see the landing strip and a bit more history and overview of the island:
A Bit of History
St. Barts covers an area of just short of ten square miles and a population of just over 8,000 people. It was a Swedish colony for almost a century. In 1784, Louis XVI traded the island to Sweden in exchange for trading rights in Gothenberg. In 1878 France re-purchased the island. To this day, the Swedish national arms and its three crowns still appear on St. Barts’ coat of arms. In early history, before the European takeover of many of the Caribbean islands prior to the 15th century, the Taino (indigenous peoples of the Caribbean ), and the Arawak (indigenous peoples of South America) were the prime inhabitors of most of the Caribbean islands. Prior to France taking over, St. Barts’ original name was Ouanalao. Columbus first encountered the island in 1493. The next 100 years would pass until the island was formally colonized.
By 1648, the French settled on the island, lasting a mere 8 years before the settlement was attacked by the Caribs, causing a brief abandonment of the island. Five years later St. Barts was bought back by the French. The island didn’t prove to be very successful or valuable and was often pirated, and once attacked by the British. This prompted Louis XVI to sell it to Sweden in return for trade access in Gothenberg, Sweden. The island became a free trading port for Europeans.
In the late 1700s, slavery was common on the island and continued well into the mid 1800s until the slaves were freed. The slaves suffered severe economic hardships because the island had no plantations. In 1852, a devastating hurricane hit the island, followed not long after by a massive fire. The Swedes decided the island wasn’t worthy of much, so decided to sell it back to France in 1878, when it became an archipelago of Guadeloupe (a French commune, forming part of Guadeloupe which was the overseas region and department of France). It wasn’t until March of 1946 that the people became French citizens with full rights.
The island offered few economic prospects and many had to take jobs on neighboring islands to get by until the 60s and 70s rolled around and the idea of tourism came, building a few hotels and a narrow landing strip on the island – big enough to accommodate a mid-sized aircraft. The island soon became known as a luxurious island for many old movie stars to stow away to for vacationing without being hounded by paparazzi. Tourism and the rapid resulting growth of the island’s economy soared, making St. Barts become a unique island with a rise in living standard, resulting in ultimate modernization, still coveted by the rich and famous. In a 2003 referendum, the residents of St, Barts wished to separate from the jurisdiction of Guadeloupe, and in 2007 they got their wish. The island of St. Barthelemy became an overseas collectivity (OCM). A governing council was elected providing the island with a degree of autonomy and a senator in Paris represents the island. The island currently retains its free port status, and in 2012, St. Barthelemy ceased being an ‘outermost region’ by leaving the EU.
Climate
The island is mostly a dry climate from December through April, with the exception of the rainy season – typically May through November with an average of 39 inches of rainfall. Despite the rainfall, there is typically sunshine throughout the year with average temps hovering up to 90 degrees during the day and mid 70s in the evenings. There isn’t much humidity thanks to the light winds.
Currency
The Euro is the mainstay currency of the island, but U.S. dollars are also accepted. Because the island is touted as a ‘luxury island’, it is quite pricey to visit, but rates do plummet quite a bit during the off- season months. Travelers recommend best rates from April through June. The island’s economy is based on tourism and it is a duty-free island, so although many of the boutiques you can shop at, although designer with designer price tags- it’s duty-free which will be considerably cheaper than at home.
Tourism
St. Barts attracts approximately 200,000 visitors per year. The wealth generated by investors on the island is responsible for the high standard of living. Most of the food on the island is imported from both U.S and France.
There are approximately only 25 hotels on the island, with most of them having on average 12- 15 rooms available. Most other accommodations available are villas to rent. For more accommodation information, check out this link.
Getting Around
Most hotels offer free round trip pickup and drop offs to and from the landing strip airport. To get around the island, most rent cars as it’s been said that taxis are not plentiful.
Cuisine
The island boasts over 70 restaurants – many of them gourmet cuisine. Common cuisine you will find there are: French, West Indian, Creole, Italian, and Asian.
Health Services
St. Barts has a small hospital and a diagnostic lab in Gustavia as well as doctors specializing in many capacities, and several pharmacies. For patients requiring more serious issues they travel to Guadeloupe, San Juan or France.
Beaches
St. Barts hosts 14 public white sand beaches. Nudism is prohibited, but topless is very common. Shell Island, to name one, is one of 4 unique beaches in the world, loaded with beautiful shells. To have a look at some of these beautiful beaches and their locations on the island, please click HERE
Find a beautiful overview of the island below:
Fun Facts
St. Barts hosts many festivals annually. You will find a complete list of festivals and dates HERE
It is customary to say hello to fellow islanders when passing.
Nobody honks their car horns – it’s considered rude.
For more information on St. Barts, visit the links below.
Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.
D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.
When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.
I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences. I write raw and honest about my own experiences, hoping through my writing, that others can relate and find that there is always a choice to move from a negative space, and look for the positive.
Quotes: “Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”
“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
When I’m not writing, I’m reading or quite possibly looking after some mundane thing in life. It’s also possible I may be on a secret getaway trip, as that is my passion—traveling.
D.G. Kaye takes the reader around the world with laughs galore. I’m not much of a shopper, but I found myself chuckling about all the occasions when the author and one her pals attempted to slip onto an airplane with a cache of treasures. I especially enjoyed her description of contorting one’s body inside the airplane’s lavatory while also doing everything in her power to avoid germs. If you’re looking for a fun, quick read, check out this book.
Thank you for joining us today and Debby would love to receive your feedback and your travel experiences. Also any questions please add them in the comments.
D.G. Kaye, Debby Gies, is on her summer hiatus from the travel column, and is busy writing her next book. In the meantime, I am repeating one or two of her earlier posts, and this one is very important. There is much to prepare for to ensure a safe and enjoyable holiday including insurance, luggage security, extra fees for exclusive holidays. Debby has all that covered and more.
Preparing for a Safe Trip
For today’s edition of Travel Talk, I’ve prepared a list of important things to do to prepare yourselves for a snag-free travel experience.
Important Tips to Consider When Booking a Trip
Travel Insurance– Don’t leave home without it! Always make sure to purchase travel insurance before leaving your country (or province for fellow Canadians). We don’t plan on mishaps, but they surely do happen. In many countries, particularly the U.S., if you need medical care and don’t have travel insurance it can easily cost you six-digit figures for medical aid. A few hundred dollars for insurance is worth the peace of mind.
Price Checking – Do your homework when booking a trip. Compare prices on various sites and with airline packages.
Check for Discounted Rates – Most hotels worldwide and car rental companies offer further discounted rates for seniors, members of CAA or AAA (Canadian Automobile Association and American Automobile Association). Remember to ask for those discounts when booking!
Keep on Price Checking – Once you’ve booked a trip in advance, do an occasional price change check. Many companies will honor a price drop if you spot it and will re-adjust your price. Before I went on my last cruise I went on their site to check some packages and noticed a sale on cruises. I saw my same cruise and cabin category listed for $500 cheaper, months after I booked it. I called my cruise rep and got the $500 deducted off the price of my cruise!
Resort Fees – Always inquire at time of booking a hotel if they charge resort fees on top of the initial price. Don’t get caught by surprise! Many U.S. hotels, in particular, are now charging approximately $33 per night extra just for bogus resort fees. Some companies hide them or make no mention of them until you get to the hotel. A one week’s stay in a hotel can run you an extra $230 just for fees, based on a one week stay. I found this out twice by surprise – once while I visited a hotel in Vegas where I was comped with a free 5-night stay, but still got snagged with daily resort fees. And once when I booked an all-inclusive air/hotel trip to Arizona with Air Canada, only to find out that the secret resort fees weren’t part of the all-inclusive. After I booked the trip, I called the hotel in Arizona to inquire about their facilities and that’s where I found out about the additional fees. You can read the article I wrote about this incident HERE and how I rectified it with the airlines.
What are Resort Fees? – Once upon a time when you booked a hotel you had to pay separately to access Wifi, park your car in the hotel’s lot or to have access to their gym facilities. Many hotels decided to put a ‘resort fee’ in place tacked on to your daily bill to use these amenities. Maybe it’s fair if we drive our cars or rent a car for our destination or feel ambitious to work out at the gym during a vacation. Wifi was often complementary in many better hotels, or it could be purchased at a much cheaper fee than the resort fee. It is also always available free in hotel lobbies. But now many hotels have lumped all the amenities under one umbrella whether you have use for it or not. And that’s what stings. I know when I’m on a short vacation I don’t have a car to park and I’m a little too busy to spend hours daily in a gym. Patrons should be given the choice of what amenities they choose to use and not be charged on a one price basis. Just sayin’.
Rewards– I always recommend booking with a site or airline that allows you to use reward points with. These rewards are often accrued from various credit card companies, Air Miles, or through loyalty programs that offer special pricing when cashing in your bonus rewards.
Check Reviews– If you’re wondering what a particular destination has to offer or how other patrons rated: a property, restaurants or city sights for your chosen destination, visit sites such as: Tripadvisor, Yahoo or Google search for the place you’re interested in and read reviews from others. Reading reviews from past visitors can give you a better feel of what you can expect.
Check Exchange Rates– Do a check on the currency you’ll be needing for the country you’ll be visiting. Believe it or not, you will often get a better rate for your money at a bank in the destination you’ll be visiting. Just make sure to purchase approximately $200 in the currency of the country you’ll be visiting before leaving home for immediate cash needs for taxis, tips or even for a coffee until you can get to a bank once you’ve arrived. And beware – only exchange currency in hotels if it’s dire. Hotels will always give you a lesser rate than a bank.
Pack Smart
Protect– Purchase a package of RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) credit card and passport protection sleeves. These jackets for your credit cards and passports are inexpensive and are important to secure your personal information from hackers who have the ability to scan your cards and passports from a distance and steal your personal and banking information. In fact, I keep all my credits cards in these jackets even while at home.
And always addluggage tagsto your bags for easy identification and in case the airlines lose them.
TSA Locks – An added step of protection for your luggage is to purchase TSA locks. These locks for your luggage are made with the capability that TSA officers or customs officers have a master key or combination for these locks. If they wish to inspect your luggage after it’s checked in, they can do so without breaking your lock or damaging your suitcase in the process (which of course happened to me a few times before I learned about TSA locks).
Travel Scales– Invest in a good hand-held set of travel scales to weigh your luggage before heading to the airport and home again. Knowing that your luggage is within the airline’s guide for weight allowance can save you a lot of agro and cost from being surprised at check-in at the airport that your luggage is overweight and having to open your luggage for the public to view while you go mad trying to move things from one bag to another, or from having to pay steep overweight charges. (Nope, I’ve never had to pay overweight charges yet, but I have been in that humiliating situation where I’ve pulled my suitcases apart publicly to move around articles between bags to avoid those charges. That was when I invested in my travel scale.
Valuables – Never pack your money or valuables in your checked luggage. Besides the danger of possible lost luggage, sadly, there are plenty of dishonest airline employees who steal from luggage. This warning also applies to digital devices such as: laptops, phones, cameras, which should all be in your carry-on luggage. I also never take expensive jewelry with me on a trip, but pack whatever jewelry I’m taking with me in a jewelry roll and keep it at the bottom of my purse until I get to my destination where I then keep all my valuables in a room safe.
Prepare for Weather Change – When traveling, wear layers of clothing if you’re leaving a cold climate and going somewhere warm. It could take you awhile once you land to get settled in your holiday rental where you don’t want to be sweating until you can unpack. In winter, when I travel to a sunny destination I’ll usually wear a T-shirt with a thick fleece hoodie. This idea not only allows me to shed the hoodie once I’ve arrived, but the hoodie keeps me warm on the often, freezing cold airplanes. For same reasons, I like to slip a pair of sandals into my carry-on bag to change into once I arrive somewhere warm.
Last, but not least– Make sure you leave enough time to get to the airport on time. Take into consideration weather and potential traffic delays when gauging your departure to the airport. For cruisers, I HIGHLY RECOMMEND traveling to your port’s destination city the day before the ship leaves and pre-booking a hotel for that night. Again, anything can happen if you leave home the day of your cruise – particularly, weather, but often mechanical mishaps with the airplanes that cause long delays. Be safe, not sorry!
I hope you’ve enjoyed this installment of Travel Tips and will take these steps into consideration for your next vacation. If I’ve missed anything here and you have something to add, I’d love to hear from you in comments.
Another wonderfully informative post from Debby on how to prepare for and be safe on your holiday… much more to come as the Travel Column returns on Monday September 2nd 2019.
About D.G. Kaye
Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.
D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.
When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.
I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences. I write raw and honest about my own experiences, hoping through my writing, that others can relate and find that there is always a choice to move from a negative space, and look for the positive.
Quotes: “Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”
“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
When I’m not writing, I’m reading or quite possibly looking after some mundane thing in life. It’s also possible I may be on a secret getaway trip, as that is my passion—traveling.
Debby has written a book about her travel adventures – Have Bags Will Travel
About the book
D.G. Kaye is back, and as she reflects on some of her more memorable vacations and travel snags, she finds herself constantly struggling to keep one step ahead of the ever-changing guidelines of the airlines–with her overweight luggage in tow. Her stories alert us to some of the pitfalls of being an obsessive shopper, especially when it comes time for D.G. to bring her treasures home, and remind us of the simpler days when traveling was a breeze.
In her quest to keep from tipping the scales, D.G. strives to devise new tricks to fit everything in her suitcases on each trip. Why is she consistently a target for Canada customs on her return journeys?
D.G.’s witty tales take us from airports, to travel escapades with best friends, to reflections on how time can change the places we hold dear in our hearts. Her memories will entertain and have you reminiscing about some of your own most treasured journeys–and perhaps make you contemplate revamping your packing strategies.
I laughed out loud at many of the author’s experiences of the perils of traveling. Going through security and customs. Aisles too narrow to avoid smacking seated passengers in the face with your carry-on. Her hilarious airplane bathroom “ritual”, which is something a lot of us perform. (Or perhaps it’s just me.) Which brings me to the section on germs. I laughed as much over Kaye’s descriptions as I did over the memory of doing many of these same things. I love her decision to call germaphobic compulsions “a lifestyle as opposed to a disorder”.
The latter half of the book is filled with anecdotes of trips taken and shopping done. While I’m not a shopaholic (actually, I avoid going to stores), I still got a chuckle out of the author’s antics. And I can relate to the lure of vacation shopping—it’s a powerful force. Unfortunately, I can also relate to being the one passenger consistently being pulled over at customs. Every time. Everywhere I go. It’s become part of my traveling routine and a joke in my family.
The chatty and conversational writing style makes this a fun read. If you’re taking a trip, make room in your carry-on for this.
D.G. Kaye… Debby Gies is having a break from the travel column this month as she is in the middle of several projects. However, in celebration of her first anniversary, I am going to repeat her first post this week and part two next week, on the subject of cruises. It is always useful to have information and tips from someone who has travelled extensively and I am sure if you missed these next two posts, you will find very helpful.
Cruising – Reports and Tips Part One
In this series I’ll be sharing some of my favorite places I’ve traveled to, tips about preparing for travel, staying safe when traveling, and how to get the best bang for your dollars.
In today’s post I’ll be talking about cruises. I love cruising. I’ve been on approximately 15 cruises and have the protocol down to a science.
I began cruising with Celebrity cruises because of the many good recommendations I received and after researching various cruise lines while initially trying to decide which cruise line to choose. I had a fabulous first experience cruise with them and never looked any further. I also met many cruisers on the cruises I’ve been on and heard lots of stories about bad experiences with low quality food, tiny cabins, expensive beverages and lack of activities offered. I also met people who traveled on various cruise lines who said their best experience was with Celebrity and I can understand why.
This article is not a plug for any particular cruise line, but rather a sharing about what I’ve gleaned about cruising. Because I travel with Celebrity this is the cruise line I make reference to. Other than the possibility of taking a River Cruise one day, any future cruises I take will remain with Celebrity. I’ve had nothing less than first class service, wonderful amenities, great food, beautiful cabins, and not to mention – their rewards program is fantastic, but I’ll get into that a little later. Therefore, for me, if it aint broken, I aint fixin’. As far as cruisers go, you either love being out on the ocean or you don’t. But for those of us who do, here’s the scoop on what to look for when choosing a cruise.
Which Cruise Line Should I Choose?
This is a matter of preference, pricing and itinerary. For many new cruisers, it can be overwhelming to decide which cruise line to book with. My advice to help you decide is to go to a cruise line site, look at their itineraries, fleet of ships, staterooms (cabins), dining options, reward programs, drink packages, activities, and check what they have offer. Doing your homework is important! You will also take note of which port your cruise leaves from – the further the sailing port is from where you live, the more it will likely cost to fly there. You can also get a good education by checking out sites that passengers leave reviews on such as Tripadvisor, Google, and directly to cruise line sites where travelers often leave honest reviews.
Are you a person who likes to spend a lot of time touring at each port or do you prefer hitting the beaches or shopping? Do too many days at sea in between ports bore you? Personally, I love sea days, they are days to relax at the pool and get my tan on. But some people get a bit antsy with too many sea days, so make sure you check out the ship’s itineraries when looking for one you’d enjoy.
Celebrity Equinox – This was the last ship I sailed with in 2017 – Posted byMogens Hallas
Which Cabins Are Best For You?
Lodging cabins aboard ship are otherwise known as staterooms. There are various types of staterooms offered, each one with its own price points and perks, depending on your choice of category.
Traditionally, inside cabins are the cheapest, and if you’re anything like me, loving to sit on my balcony to take in the ocean view and enjoy watching the ship dock or sail, you’ll want the freedom of stepping outside your room and perhaps sipping on a cocktail after a lovely day in the sun. But some people are willing to forgo these benefits for a cheaper price and don’t mind an inside cabin.
Inside cabinsdon’t have windows or balconies, and as you may have seen in movies, the very bottom floors may have a tiny portal window if the cabin is just above sea level. I’m also claustrophobic so that is certainly no option for me.
Oceanview cabins have large floor to ceiling windows facing the ocean, but unless you go up one category, they don’t include balconies. From there, we get into oceanview cabins with balconies and yet another upgrade termed Concierge Class. These cabins are typically a little more generous in size with upgraded room amenities, bigger bathrooms, and come with additional services – your own stateroom attendant on call 24/7 for all your needs including room service orders.
Typically, in this class, you will also find other goodies in your stateroom upon arrival such as: a bottle of wine or champagne, personal tote beach bags, yours to keep, coupons for discounts in select restaurants onboard that aren’t part of your package, wifi usage, priority disembarking privileges, and of course, afternoon hor’s d’heurves of your choice brought to your cabin daily.
Next category up is Concierge Class cabins with spa privileges, ie: use of sauna and relaxing aromatherapy rooms for cabin passengers situated on spa floors, plus dining privileges in the ship’s elite restaurant for those who don’t prefer eating in the huge dining room where patrons congregate nightly for dinner at designated times.
Then of course, you have the Penthouse Cabins, which are almost condo-sized, complete with every imaginable perk including large balconies with sunbeds and a personal butler!
Which Part Of The Ship Is The Least Rocky?
The quick answer is ‘midship’. Midship cabins will typically run you a little more money than the same cabin type located at either the front or back ends of the ship. You will feel the least movement of the ship in a midship cabin. Personally, I don’t get seasick, despite encountering a few rough patches on a couple of cruises I took. But there are several aids people use to combat seasickness.
Some recommended aids to help with seasickness are Seabands, worn on the wrists, said to work on accupressure points to hold nausea at bay. Others swear by Bonine and Gravol. These are tablets you can purchase at any drugstore. Just make sure to take the non-drowsy Gravol or you might sleep away half your vacation!
What Do I Need To Know About Boarding The Ship?
Typically, on all cruises I’ve taken out of Miami or Fort Lauderdale, Florida, the cruises depart around 4PM, and protocol is, you can board up to 3 hours early and have lunch aboard and mingle before you’re assigned the okay to go to your cabin as time is needed to clean the rooms from the last sailing’s passengers. Concierge Class and all categories higher can board earlier because they have priority checkin.
The cruise lines state clearly that anyone missing final boarding time should find their way over to the next port that ship will sail to. So not fun! For this reason, many cruisers like myself, are seasoned enough to know that unforeseen circumstances such as flight delays, bad weather, etc., can leave you vulnerable to getting left behind from boarding the ship for same day arrivals. For these reasons, I prefer to fly out at least a day before the ship’s sail and begin my vacation earlier. Besides, I get extra cross border shopping time in!
Boarding a ship is similar to going through airport security where you will pass through similar security checks and scanners for your personal items to ensure safety for all passengers. Similarly, when the ship docks in each port and you return from an off-ship excursion, you will go through the same security procedure to re-board.
Once you’ve checked in on the ship, you’ll be given a ship card which will serve as your room key and cruise credit card where anything you purchase aboard – drinks, upgraded restaurant meals, shopping, booked tours, paid activities, etc., will all be charged to that card. You will pay your onboard cruise bill the evening before returning to your disembarking port at the end of the cruise.
As soon as the ship sails, each passenger will be directed to their section’s muster station for a short crash-course on emergency procedures. This is mandatory on all ships although, meeting times will vary with each cruise line.
Rewards Programs
Most cruise lines offer perks for new cruisers and upgrades for patrons who are repeat cruisers. It’s important to check what your cruise line has to offer you. I know with Celebrity, the more you cruise, the more discounts and perks you receive for every consequent cruise you take with them. These perks can be anything from cabin upgrades to free drink packages, free wifi, invites to the Captain’s party, discounts on spa facilities, and even discounted tour packages (something I’ll get into on the next post).
The points I earn for each cruise bumps up my status to a new category of perks. To stay competitive, many cruise lines offer package deals you can purchase when booking your cruise such as: a choice of different alcohol and non/alcohol packages and an onboard credit. And many offer these perks as part of a ‘take your choice’ bonus package just for booking with them. There may be a drink package, a special offer to have your tips included, or perhaps free or discounted wifi offered as a special bonus at the time of your booking.
Something else I recommend is if you discover you love cruising, you should book another cruise while onboard at the ship’s travel office because you will receive a discounted price and a cabin upgrade plus a choice of at least 2 or 3 packages included free in your booking onboard. I’m also going to add here that Celebrity has an ‘evergreen’ policy where once you’ve booked another future cruise you can change your destination choice to a different cruise anytime before the booked cruise date to pay the balance in full is due and keep every discount and package you were given when put to a different cruise. So, I highly recommend booking another cruise while onboard – any cruise, it doesn’t matter because you can change the destination or dates indefinitely and as many times as you deem. Note: You will also have the option to cancel a booked cruise and get back your full deposit. So, there’s really nothing to lose – it’s a win/win!
~ ~ ~
Stay tuned for Part 2 of this post when I’ll be getting into your dining options, when and where to book excursions, shopping and tipping protocol, and things to beware of!
Do you have any cruise stories or info you’d like to share here?
Debby would love your questions and feedback
About D.G. Kaye
Debby Gies is a Canadian nonfiction/memoir author who writes under the pen name of D.G. Kaye. She was born, raised, and resides in Toronto, Canada. Kaye writes about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues.
D.G. writes to inspire others. Her writing encompasses stories taken from events she encountered in her own life, and she shares the lessons taken from them. Her sunny outlook on life developed from learning to overcome challenges in her life, and finding the upside from those situations, while practicing gratitude for all the positives.
When Kaye isn’t writing intimate memoirs, she brings her natural sense of humor into her other works. She loves to laugh and self- medicate with a daily dose of humor.
I love to tell stories that have lessons in them, and hope to empower others by sharing my own experiences. I write raw and honest about my own experiences, hoping through my writing, that others can relate and find that there is always a choice to move from a negative space, and look for the positive.
Quotes: “Live Laugh Love . . . And Don’t Forget to Breathe!”
“For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
When I’m not writing, I’m reading or quite possibly looking after some mundane thing in life. It’s also possible I may be on a secret getaway trip, as that is my passion—traveling.
Debby has written a book about her travel adventures – Have Bags Will Travel
About the book
D.G. Kaye is back, and as she reflects on some of her more memorable vacations and travel snags, she finds herself constantly struggling to keep one step ahead of the ever-changing guidelines of the airlines–with her overweight luggage in tow. Her stories alert us to some of the pitfalls of being an obsessive shopper, especially when it comes time for D.G. to bring her treasures home, and remind us of the simpler days when traveling was a breeze.
In her quest to keep from tipping the scales, D.G. strives to devise new tricks to fit everything in her suitcases on each trip. Why is she consistently a target for Canada customs on her return journeys?
D.G.’s witty tales take us from airports, to travel escapades with best friends, to reflections on how time can change the places we hold dear in our hearts. Her memories will entertain and have you reminiscing about some of your own most treasured journeys–and perhaps make you contemplate revamping your packing strategies.
“Have Bags, Will Travel” is a delightful read on the experiences of travel, fashion, the art of packing suitcases with the emphasis on having a good time. Author, D.G. Kaye details her days on board planes to many popular destinations and her vivacious antics with friends. She also relates her solo travels to exotic destinations with steep cliffs and too much baggage. I particularly enjoyed the details of the by-gone, romantic days aboard Wardair, and the exquisite details of vintage Las Vegas.
A consummate shopper, D.G. Kaye relates her rather humorous run-ins with customs officials. How does it feel to be singled out routinely by airline officials? A read through this humorous pages will give you the insight to these first-hand conflicts.
I would say this might be required reading for shoe connoisseurs and fashion mavens especially if they have a plane ticket in hand. Germ avoidance theory is also discussed, and it may never be possible to look at airplane bathrooms the same.
D.G. Kaye brings back the memories of best friends and blazing trips through the desert. Many readers will identify with the struggles of this stylish lady attempting to blend in to avoid a custom’s mishap. A short and super fun read, “Have Bags, Will Travel” is perfect for your next airplane ride.
Debby Gies has been scanning the airwaves for videos to share… here are some more that she has come across.. ..D.G. Kaye Writer Blog is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.
St. Barts is a small volcanic island, encircled by shallow reefs, and is one of four territories that make up what’s called the Leeward Islands, located in the northwest of the Caribbean Sea, lying approximately 22 miles southeast of St. Martin and just north of St. Kitts. The capital city of St Barts is Gustavia, named after a Swedish King. The other three islands part of these territories are: Martinique, French West Indies, and Guadeloupe.
In early history, before the European takeover of many of the Caribbean islands prior to the 15th century, the Taino (indigenous peoples of the Caribbean ), and the Arawak (indigenous peoples of South America) were the prime inhabitors of most of the Caribbean islands. Prior to France taking over, St. Barts’ original name was Ouanalao. Columbus first encountered the island in 1493. The next 100 years would pass until the island was formally colonized.
Smorgasbord Blog Magazine 