Smorgasbord Laughter is the Best Medicine – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin November 24th 2022 – Turkey Dilemmas and Betting slips


Firstly, some funnies from Debby Gies followed by a joke or two from Sally. Thanks to those who share the funnies on the internet.

D.G. Writes is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.My thanks to Debby for excellent foraging

D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US And: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. WritesGoodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Debby’s new series Spiritual Awareness..Spiritual Awareness – Decoding Sequenced Angel Messages in Numbers by D.G. Kaye

Now for some fun from Sally….from the archives

Sally’s books: Amazon US –  Amazon UK – More reviews : Goodreads – Podcast – Sally Cronin on Soundcloud – Twitter: @sgc58

Finding out your mummy’s age

An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert and came upon a casket containing a mummy. After examining it, he called the curator of a prestigious museum.

“I’ve just found a 3,000 year old mummy,” said the archaeologist. “It’s a man who died of heart failure.”

“Bring it in,” said the curator. “We’ll check it out.”

A week later, the amazed curator called the archaeologist. “You were exactly right about the mummy’s age and cause of death,” he said. “How in the world did you know?”

“Easy,” the archaeologist replied. “He was holding a piece of papyrus that said ‘10,000 shekels on Goliath.’”

Placing more bets

One day while he was at the track betting on the ponies and nearly losing his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track and blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race.

Lo and behold, that horse — a very long shot — won the race.

Before the following race, the Priest blessed yet another horse. Mitch made a beeline for the window, and placed a small bet on the horse. Again, even though it was another long shot, the horse the priest had blessed won the race.

Mitch collected his winnings, and anxiously waited to see which horse the priest would bless for the 6th race. The priest showed, blessed a horse, Mitch bet a large amount of money on it, and it won!

True to his pattern, the priest stepped out onto the track before the last race and blessed the forehead, eyes, ears, and hooves of one of the horses.

Mitch bet every cent he had, including his life savings and the deed to his house. Mitch then watched the horse come in dead last. He was dumbfounded.

He made his way to the track, and when he found the priest, he demanded, “What happened, Father? All day long you blessed horses and they won. The last race, you blessed a horse and he lost. Now, thanks to you, I’ve lost all my savings!”

The priest nodded wisely and said, “That’s the problem with Protestants — you can’t tell the difference between a simple blessing and the Last Rites

 

Thank you for joining us today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face.. Debby and Sally.

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine Weekly Round Up – 8th – 14th August 2022 – Hits 2001, Spiritual Awareness, Waterford, Obesity, Book Reviews, Book Fair, Funnies


Welcome to the round up of posts you might have missed this week on Smorgasbord.

I hope that you have managed to stay cool during the last week and that those impacted by wildfires are safe. It certainly is a world of two halves at the moment with the Southern Hemisphere experiencing unusually cold conditions. There are several who are struggling to get crops in the ground because of the cold weather which will impact the prices even more in the coming year.

We have had sunshine all week and this is certainly the driest month we have experienced in the last four or five years. The last time was in 2017 and I think that was the year we had a lot of snow in the winter… glad we have had the wood burner refurbished.

David has finished the painting of the outside of the house. Just a couple of jobs on the list still waiting to be dealt with by outside contractors… some guttering needs to be replaced and we need the boiler serviced. We do that annually but this year it is even more important as we will need to ge an efficiency certificate for the house before we put on the market. Every one is busy at the this time of year particularly as many are taking advantage of the holidays to take a break. We are hoping that perhaps in early September we might get the call backs we need.   Here is the finished product however with just the outside wall of the garden facing the road needing some final touches.

This week William Price King joined me for The Breakfast Show and shared the final post in the Nina Simone story. Next week we move into the classical music genre with the life and music of the great Pavarotti. You can also find William Blog– IMPROVISATIONWilliam Price King on Tumblr

Debby Gies was here on Monday with a brand new series exploring our spiritual well being.. Over on her blog you will find her posts including her experiences organising her own car servicing for the first time in 27 years, some very helpful writer’s links and her usual Sunday Book Review spot..this week some great feedback for her own books… head over to D.G. Kaye

Carol Taylor  will be here on Wednesday with an exploration of foods and culinary terms in her terrific series A-Z of foods with the letter E. This week on her own blog you can enjoy her Monday Musings, exploration of the cuisine of Egypt  and Saturday Snippets.. all about the word ‘Vine’. You can read this post and the others Carol Cooks2

Thanks too for all your visits, comments and shares this week… they mean a great deal..♥

The Breakfast Show with William Price King and Sally Cronin – Chart Hits 2001 Part One – Alicia Keys, Christina Aguilera, Mýa, Pink and rapper L’il Kim, Kylie Minogue, Enrique Iglesias

William Price King meets the Music Legends – Nina Simone – Finale – Hit Singles

Spiritual Awareness – Communicating Through Spiritual Energy – #Empaths – By D.G. Kaye

#Memoir #Waterford #Ireland #History – The Colour of Life The Digs In Dublin 1944 by Geoff Cronin

The Nuns at the Glue Pot 1946

Size Matters: The Sequel – #Morbid Obesity – #CandidaAlbicans – Eliminating Refined Sugars by Sally Cronin

#Ireland – Recipes and Tales from the Kitchen of Oceanic Temptations: A Taste of the Wild Atlantic Way by Mary Crowley

I Wish I Knew Then What I Know Now! – Guest Round Up – Part Two – D.G. Kaye, Sandra Cox, Roberta Eaton Cheadle, Stevie Turner, Dorothy Grover-Read, Terry Tyler, Alex Craigie, Jacqui Murray, D.L. Finn, Rebecca Budd

Summer Book Fair 2022 – #Poetry Frank Prem, #Africa #Flyingboats Jemima Pett

#Action #Adventure Gwen M. Plano, #PostWar #Russia Marina Osipova

Posts from Your Archives 2022- ‘Lucky Dip’ – #Teaching #FutureInvestment Pete Springer

Posts from Your Archives 2022 – ‘Potluck’ – #TopTenThings D.Wallace Peach by Marcia Meara

Posts from Your Archives 2022- ‘Lucky Dip- #InternetProviders #Tenthings John Howell

‘Potluck’ #Books – Being a Cataloguer by Audrey Driscoll

Cathy Ryan

#Rockies #Haiku D.Wallace Peach, #Interactivebooks Robbie Cheadle, #London1950s Beetley Pete, #Childhood Judith Barrow, #Bookreview Cathy Ryan, #Translations Jaq D. Hawkins, Story Reading Ape

Laughter is the Best Medicine 2022 – Host Malcolm Allen – Book Covers and Pyramids

Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Holiday complaints and Drink Mixers Posted on August 11, 2022

 

Thanks so much for all the support this week and I hope you will drop in again… Sally

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – January 17th – 23rd 2022 – Hits 1986, Nat King Cole, Winter Sun destinations, Healthy Eating, Book Reviews, Funnies


Welcome to the round up with the posts from the week you might have missed.

A grey overcast day here in Ireland but at least it is dry and in fact I might have to water the pot plants in the front of the house which is almost unheard of during the winter months!

Not a great deal to report on the home front. I am just waiting until the end of the month to book my hotels for my planned trip to the UK for my sister’s 80th. We are still around the 6,000 mark here and the UK hovering around the 100,000. Hopefully that downward trend will continue in the next couple of weeks. Some of the paperwork, tests etc are being lifted from Monday.. they were put in place to prevent the spread of Omicron but that ship has sailed. There are murmurs about other variants but the general premis is that we are going to have to live with it. I am as boosted as I can be including the flu jab and have my travel permit, fingers crossed.

I did get out and about during the week and was delighted to be the guest of award winning author Janice Spina for an interview. Janice also very kindly reviewed Life is Like a Mosaic… so a double pleasure.

Interview with Author Sally Cronin

It is such a pleasure to welcome a fellow author to Interview an Author on Jemsbooks.blog. Today, please help me welcome talented author/poet/nutritionist Sally Cronin!

Thank you so much, Sally, for coming today to share a little bit about yourself and your lovely books. I am excited to have you here! The floor is yours! 

Head over to join us: Interview and review with Janice Spina

As ever I am very grateful for the contributions by William Price King, Debby Gies and Carol Taylor and I hope you will check out their posts and enjoy the music, travel and food.

And thank you for dropping in and reading, liking, commenting and sharing the posts.. it keeps me motivated.

On with the show….

Chart Hits 1986 Part Two – Peter Gabriel, Billy Ocean, The Bangles, Lionel Richie

William Price King meets the Jazz Icons – Nat King Cole – The 1950s

Three Winter Sun Destinations – Kauai, Hawaii, Malta and Martinique

Cook from Scratch to prevent nutritional deficiency – Vitamin B1 – Wholegrains, Mackeral, Pork, Pineapple, Eggs, Asparagus

#Winning Streak – The Charity Shop

Winning Streak – The Date

Tales from the Garden – The Santuary

The Gentle Detox – Part Three – Pre-Weight Loss – Willpower booster

#Interview Annika Perry on Priorhouse, #Writing Traci Kenworth, #Characters D.Wallace Peach, #Review Robbie Cheadle, #Writerlinks D.G. Kaye, #Stories Allan Hudson

Oh Baubles: A Christmas Romance Novella by Harmony Kent

#Christmas #Romance – Love Me by Jacquie Biggar

New Book on the Shelves – #Biography #WWI, Queen Victoria, #Adventures, Lucky Jack by S. Bavey

Personal Recommendations – #Paranormal Robbie Cheadle, #Western #Romance Sandra Cox, #Fantasy C.S. Boyack

Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Pizza, Coffee and Breaking and Entering

January 20th 2022 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Eye openers and Husbanding

 

Thanks for dropping in and have a lovely week ahead   Sally.

Smorgasbord Weekly Blogger January 9th 2022 – Funnies, Story Reading Ape, Moon Blessings Colleen Chesebro, #Mercury D.G. Kaye, #Bookreviews Jacquie Biggar, #Shrimp New Vintage Kitchen, #Customerservice John Howell.


A small selection of posts I have enjoyed in the last week or so and I hope you will head over to enjoy in full.. thanks Sally.

The first post is from The Story Reading Ape and are funnies posted on New Year’s Day.. a great way to start the year.. and you can find more laughter each Monday on Chris’s blog.

Head over to enjoy all the funnies: The Story Reading Ape New Year’s Day Funnies

The next post is from Colleen Chesebro with some magic to begin the year with. The moon is a powerful force on the earth and the ebb and flow of water and life….

New Moon Blessings – Spell for Abundance 1/2/2022 

The January 2022 New Moon is today, January 2nd!

There are so many versions of the New Moon Blessings Abundance spell that no one knows who came up with the idea first! My Sister of the Fey, Annette Rochelle Aben, first introduced me to her version of the abundance spell several years ago… you know what? It worked! It’s all based on the Law of Abundance.

Find out more about the Law of Abundance: A Witch’s Brew – Moon Blessings

The next post from Debby Gies is also about the cosmic influence on our lives as she shares news of this upcoming Mercury Retrograde on January 13th with its impact on communications and plans.. an effect she is already experiencing with cancelled flights and being on hold for four hours to get a human response… to travel or not to travel.. a dilemma!

Hello Mercury Retrograde 2022

It’s a new year and a clean slate, and hopes are high that this year will be the end of the Coronavirus as we know it. But the fact remains that we are globally, high in virus and numbers, due to the the recent appearance of Omicron. We can all hope that as this virus continues, it will tamper down, lose it’s hurricane strength, and hopefully, no new strains will mutate. And in the meantime, because the world is already in chaos trying to stamp out this virus, we’re about to have our first Mercury Retrograde of 2022. Crazy times 2.0. It begins January 13th, lasting until February 3rd. But these dates are not inclusive. Like a full moon, retrogrades begin their ‘retroshade’ effects within a week or two of its arrival date, and can linger just as long after completion. And I’m already experiencing the shakeup.

Head over to read all about Mercury’s Mischief and the weeks to be aware of them this year: D.G. Kaye – Hello Mercury Retrograde 2022

The next post is from Jacquie Biggar who shares her holiday reading.. some familiar faces (thank you Jacquie for including me) Jacquie also shares some amazing snow pictures and wonderful family news about her daughter’s academic achievements.

My Holiday Reading List- Books to Warm Your Heart on a Cold Winter’s Night #BookReviews @dlfinnauthor @Marsharwest @sgc58 @Sandra_Cox 

Books reviewed by Jacquie over the holidays

Head over to read Jacquie’s new year update and her reviews for the books: Holiday Reading book reviews by Jacquie Biggar

Now time for some culinary expertise and a delicious sounding, lighter post festivity recipe from Dorothy of the New Vintage Kitchen… definitely on the menu. Dorothy also shares her family Christmas which sounds amazing.

Lemon Garlic Shrimp over Spaghetti Squash, something light for the new year 

We’ve indulged, and now it is time to think about a little lighter experience at the dinner table!

The stars were with us, and our family was able to gather together and celebrate the holidays this year, only the second time we’ve all been together in over two years. This being Vermont, with its unpredictable weather fluctuations, the celebration happened almost a week after Christmas. Toss a December 30th granddaughter’s birthday in the mix, and we had a wonderful Christmas/Birthday/New Year gathering of my whole brood. In these unpredictable times, any event actually happening is a blessing indeed! 

Head over to grab this delicious sounding recipe: New Vintage Kitchen – Lemon Garlic Shrimp

And last but not least is one of John Howell’s Top Ten Things Not to Do… and having been through the customer service wringer myself more than a few times… I took note of John’s tips.

This list was inspired by standing in line at Wal-Mart to return a screwdriver that broke. I know. Why would I buy a screwdriver at Wal-Mart? Long story. Let’s just say it was an emergency purchase that did not go well. I hope you enjoy the list.

Top Ten Things Not to do in Customer Service.

10 If you are next at the customer service desk, do not fall asleep. If you do, at best, you will get yelled at by the crowd. At worst, you will not hear the word “Next” and will be knocked off your feet by the person behind you. This could lead to a severe injury. ) Or even worse when you fall on your returns which are glass Christmas ornaments)

9 If you are at the customer service desk, have your receipt ready. If you don’t, at best, you will take precious time to find it causing your linemates to want to kill you with their bare hands. At worst, the time it takes to find the receipt will be multiplied exponentially for the last person in line. (You do raise the possibility that they might just pass away from old age before getting to the front of the line) 

Head over to enjoy the other eight top tips from John: Top Ten Things not to do in Customer Service

 

Thanks for dropping in and I hope you will head over to enjoy these posts in full.. thanks Sally.

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – August 10th 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Language and Wonder Diet


Debby Gies has been foraging on the internet for funnies to share and I have a joke or two up my sleeve.

  

If you have not discovered the non-fiction books by D.G. Kaye: Amazon USAnd: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. WritesGoodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Check out Debby’s latest relationship column here on Smorgasbord July 2021 – The Universe Brings Us Kindred Spirits

Now something from Sally – A little elderly humour

Road safety!

I’ve sure gotten old. I’ve had two By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I’m half blind, can’t hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can’t remember if I’m 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends.But…..Thank God, I still have my Florida driver’s license!

Being in charge!

When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.

The wonder diet!

A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.

“I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she said. “What’s your secret for a long happy life?”

“I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day,” he said. “I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise.”

“That’s amazing,” the woman said. “How old are you?’

“Twenty-six,” he said.

Thanks for dropping in and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – August 3rd 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Television and Alligators


Debby Gies has been foraging on the internet for funnies to share and I have a joke or two up my sleeve.

  

If you have not discovered the non-fiction books by D.G. Kaye: Amazon USAnd: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. WritesGoodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Check out Debby’s latest relationship column here on Smorgasbord July 2021 – The Universe Brings Us Kindred Spirits

Now something from Sally

Being a maid.

There is a story about Dorothy Parker, the American author, whose maid handed in her notice after finding a live alligator in the bath one morning. Her note stated ‘I cannot work in a house where there is an alligator in the bath. I would have mentioned this when I took the job, but I didn’t think the issue would come up!’

Never miss an opportunity?

An elderly lady was introduced to a doctor at a dinner party and immediately struck up a conversation. ‘I wonder if I could ask you a question? I have been getting these pains in my side and up my right leg as well what do you think might be the problem?’

‘I’m sorry but I’m not that kind of doctor.. I am a Doctor of Economics.

‘Oh I see,’ said the lady, ‘Well, in that case should I sell my British telecom shares.’

 

Thanks for dropping in and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Update – July 25th – 31st 2021 – Billy Joel, Short Stories, Poetry, Book Reviews, Pet and Human Health, Funnies


Welcome to the round up of posts you might have missed this week on Smorgasbord.

Another week flown by and the summer is half way through in the Northern Hemisphere anyway. Nothing much to report from HQ.. my laptop that I use for the podcast in my mini-studio blew a gasket on Friday…the hard drive failed but the in house technical department has the matter in hand and I should be adding some new posts to the podcast again soon.. I do have some already pre-recorded which I will filter through in the meantime.

Thanks to William Price King for his selections for the Breakfast Show this week and Debby Gies and Malcolm Allen for their funnies. Debby has been whizzing around blogworld this week and a special thank you for all the posts she has shared this week around the usual haunts.

My thanks to you as well for all the lovely comments and shares this week of the posts, it is appreciated and keeps me motivated.. Have a lovely weekend…Sally

Chart Hits 1974 Part Two – Elton John, The Hues, The Hollies, Billy Joel.

What’s in a Name? Volume One – What’s in a Name?- Francis – Forging New Bonds by Sally Cronin

Tales from the Spanish Garden – Special story – Mollie (The Duchess) Coleman – by Sally Cronin

New Review – Balroop Singh – #Poetry Slivers: Chiseled Poetry

Book Reviews Rewind – #Paranormal #Romance – Ghostly Interference: (White Rune Series Book 1) by Jan Sikes.

Book Reviews Rewind – #YA – Amanda in Malta: The Sleeping Lady (An Amanda Travels Adventure Book 8) by Darlene foster

Etheree – Peaks by Sally Cronin

Some Health Hacks for everyday niggles such as Pins and Needles by Sally Cronin

cranberries_background_200742

The Kidneys and Urinary Tract – Urinary Tract infections by Sally Cronin

Ticks – What, When and How to remove safely

Grazzi hafna from Sally aged seven to the old Prickly Pear farmer and his donkey #Influencers Sally Cronin

Smorgasbord Podcast – Who are you writing your book for?

Smorgasbord Coffee Morning – Bring a Guest – Authors Darlene Foster and Nancy Blodgett Klein

Conversational Italian for Travelers: Just the Important Phrases (with Restaurant Vocabulary and Idiomatic Expressions) by Kathryn Occhipinti

New Book on the Shelves – Existing Creatures Living Dragons by Leyla Cardena

#Reviews – #Poetry Balroop Singh, #YAFantasy M. J. Mallon, #Romance Jacquie Biggar

Cafe Update – #Reviews – #Family James J. Cudney, #Paranormal John W. Howell, #WW2 #Russia Marina Osipova

– #Reviews – #CrimeThriller Carol Balawyder, #Poetry Victoria Zigler, #Family Lisette Brodey

Wednesday July 28th 2021 – #WriterLinks D.G. Kaye, #Poetry Robbie Cheadle, #Reviews D.Wallace Peach, #Finances Jim Borden

Thursday July 29th 2021 – #Olympics Pete Springer, #Patchwork Jennie Fitzkee, #Research Jacqui Murray

July 27th 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Shoes and Bricks

July 29th 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Dogs and Tact

July 30th 2021 – Malcolm Allen – Zoom Meetings and Restaurants

 

Thank you very much for dropping in and I hope you will join me again next week.. thanks Sally.

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines Extra – July 9th 2021 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Brooms and Coffins


Author Daniel Kemp entertains us again with his funnies from: Danny Kemp .. Always a place to find funnies and jokes to cheer you up… plus some satirical political commentary on politicians at home and abroad.

And to finish up…

The Coffin….

A man walking home from the pub hears a thump…………. thump……………thump behind him he turns around and sees a coffin following him down the street

He thinks I want nothing to do with that so he starts to walk faster then he hears thump……. thump……. thump the coffin going faster so he starts to run when he hears thump, thump, thump the coffin also running.

He gets to his front door and is panicking to get the key in the lock as the coffin’s coming, finally he gets the key in the lock opens the door slams it shut locking and bolting it he sits down wondering what’s going on.

Then there’s an almighty crash the coffin comes through the front door knocking it off his hinges and stands there in the doorway, the guy dodges round the coffin runs up the stairs into the bathroom, and locks the bathroom door.

Next, he hears thump thump thump of the coffin coming up the stairs, the coffin reaches the top, launches itself against the bathroom door smashing it off its hinges, and stands in the doorway & the guy is trapped.

The coffin starts coming towards him, panicking he starts picking things off the bathroom shelves and throwing them at the coffin. First, he throws a can of Gillette shaving foam but the coffin keeps coming towards him next he throws a bar of Imperial leather soap but the coffin keeps coming towards him then he throws a bottle of Venos cough medicine at the coffin and the coffin stops!

My thanks to Danny for allowing me to raid his Facebook: Danny Kemp

About Daniel Kemp

Daniel Kemp, ex-London police officer, mini-cab business owner, pub tenant and licensed London taxi driver never planned to be a writer, but after his first novel –The Desolate Garden — was under a paid option to become a $30 million film for five years until distribution became an insurmountable problem for the production company what else could he do?

In May 2018 his book What Happened In Vienna, Jack? became a number one bestseller on four separate Amazon sites: America, UK, Canada, and Australia.

Although it’s true to say that he mainly concentrates on what he knows best; murders laced by the mystery involving spies, his diverse experience of life shows in the short stories he writes, namely: Why? A Complicated Love, and the intriguing story titled The Story That Had No Beginning.

He is the recipient of rave reviews from a prestigious Manhattan publication, been described as –the new Graham Green — by a managerial employee of Waterstones Books, for whom he did a countrywide tour of signing events, and he has appeared on ‘live’ television in the UK.

A selection of books by Daniel Kemp

A recent review for The Story That Had no Beginning

Feb 23, 2021 Roberta Cheadle rated it five stars

This book is an interesting and complex story about twins, Tom and Alice Collins, who enter the foster care system at a young age and are raised separately. The book starts with Alicia Collinson, aka Alice Collins, and her sophisticated boyfriend hosting two friends for a dinner party. Unknow to the dinner participants, the ghost of her brother Tom, known as Bobby Brown among his peer group, is also in attendance. It is obvious from the start that Alicia is a woman of good financial circumstances who mingles with the elite of London’s society. It also becomes evident quite early on, that Tom’s life has followed a very divergent path and he was a member of the mafia-styled criminal class.

The book follows the paths of the twins and how they come to end up in their different circumstances and lifestyles. Alicia is a well-know and talented photographer who owns her own home in London and has plenty of money. Tom has money, albeit ill gotten, but he dies the death of a criminal.

Tom is a conflicting character as he is a man involved in high class prostitution and other shady and illegal dealings. Despite being a seasoned criminal, his narration of the story reveals a different side to his character. One that questions the life he lived and celebrates the good fortune and success achieved by his sister.

Alice or Alicia has the great good luck to become the protegee of a wealthy single woman with no children who effectively adopts her and sets her on the road to success in her chosen field of photography. Unknown to the naïve Alicia, her benefactor isn’t everything she appears to be and some of the people she socialises with are infamous for their continuous promiscuous behaviour with the same, or the opposite, sex. In a contrast to her brother, Tom, who is in the centre of the debaucherous lifestyles led by the wealthy upper classes of London, Alicia hovers around the edges, not realising what is right in front of her.

The author has an in-depth knowledge of the illicit behaviour of the British upper class and paints a detailed picture of how greed, selfishness and a complete disregard for the values and ethics of society lead to the downfall of people.

This book will make you question what success is all about and whether it leads to contentment as the stories of the many characters unfold. This is thought provoking tale as despite the huge difference in the siblings financial and social positions, both of them end up with money but neither of them have good reliable partners or simply and happy lives.

Read the reviews and buy the books also in audio: Amazon UK – And : Amazon US – follow Daniel: Goodreads – Website: Author Danny Kemp – Facebook: Books by Daniel – Twitter:@danielkemp6

Thanks for visiting and I know Danny would love your feedback..Have a good weekend…Sally

 

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines Extra – April 30th 2021 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp – Onions and other Favourite Things


Author Daniel Kemp entertains us again with his funnies from: Danny Kemp .. Always a place to find funnies and jokes to cheer you up… plus some satirical political commentary on politicians at home and abroad. –

Plus as a special –  two of Danny’s books are FREE until 5th May – links at the bottom of the funnies.

May be an image of text that says "THE RECIPE SAID ΤΟ DICE THE ONION. WENT Το A LOT OF EFFORT BUT I'M PLEASED WITH THE RESULT."

May be an image of text that says "9 OUT OF 10 HUSBANDS AGREED THAT THEIR WIVES ARE ALWAYS RIGHT. THE 10TH HUSBAND HASN'T BEEN SEEN SINCE THE STUDY WAS CONDUCTED."

May be an image of 1 person and text that says "They're cute and look harmless but they are loud, incredibly expensive to keep, and absolutely untrainable! The other one is a kangaroo. I don't know anything about kangaroos... know"

May be an image of text

May be an image of text that says "They say we learn from our mistakes... That's why I'm making as many as possible. I'll soon be a genius!"

And to finish up…

Julie Andrews Turning 84-this is hysterical!

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan’s Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was My Favorite Things from the legendary movie ‘Sound Of Music’. Here are the lyrics she used:

(Sing It!) – If you sing it, it’s especially hysterical!!!
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Back pain, confused brains, and no need for sinnin’,
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin’,
And we won’t mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.
When the joints ache When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I’ve had,
And then I don’t feel so bad.
>>>>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>
(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd
that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores. Please
share Ms. Andrews’ clever wit and humor with others who
would appreciate it.)

 

My thanks to Danny for allowing me to raid his Facebook: Danny Kemp

About Daniel Kemp

Daniel Kemp, ex-London police officer, mini-cab business owner, pub tenant and licensed London taxi driver never planned to be a writer, but after his first novel –The Desolate Garden — was under a paid option to become a $30 million film for five years until distribution became an insurmountable problem for the production company what else could he do?

In May 2018 his book What Happened In Vienna, Jack? became a number one bestseller on four separate Amazon sites: America, UK, Canada, and Australia.

Although it’s true to say that he mainly concentrates on what he knows best; murders laced by the mystery involving spies, his diverse experience of life shows in the short stories he writes, namely: Why? A Complicated Love, and the intriguing story titled The Story That Had No Beginning.

He is the recipient of rave reviews from a prestigious Manhattan publication, been described as –the new Graham Green — by a managerial employee of Waterstones Books, for whom he did a countrywide tour of signing events, and he has appeared on ‘live’ television in the UK.

A selection of books by Daniel Kemp

One of the reviews for A Covenant of Spies

Brian Kitchen 5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent spy novel.  Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 5 January 2020

Daniel Kemp has written another excellent spy novel about Patrick West, the chairman of the British Joint Intelligence Committee. In this novel Patrick is attempting to unravel a web of deceit centred around Nikita Kudashov, an intelligence operative, who wants West to extract his grand-daughter from Moscow.

As West delves deeper into Kudashov’s history, he finds links to operations he took part in himself back in the 1980s and a trail that leads to an old enemy and also involves the Machiavellian machinations of his old boss Dickie Blythe-Smith.

I won’t spoil the plot for readers, but I was engrossed by the story and really enjoyed it. I enjoy reading the novels of John le Carré, Len Deighton and Graham Green and think this novel would appeal to readers who also like those writers.  

FREE until May 5th

Read the reviews and buy the books also in audio: Amazon UK – And : Amazon US – follow Daniel: Goodreads – Website: Author Danny Kemp – Facebook: Books by Daniel – Twitter:@danielkemp6

Thanks for visiting and I know Danny would love your feedback..Have a good weekend…Sally

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – April 22nd 2021 – Hosts Debby Gies and Sally Cronin – Stress Test and Cheap Cow


Welcome to laughter lines. We will be sharing some of our favourites from the archives over the next few weeks.

  If you have not discovered the non-fiction books by D.G. Kaye: Amazon USAnd: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. WritesGoodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster

Check out Debby’s column here on Smorgasbord D.G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships 2020

Now something from Sally

Discerning film goer

A couple go to a movie and find that a few seats to their right is a man and his dog. The dog seemed well behaved enough so they didn’t call an usher to complain. They watch the movie and notice that during the action scenes, the dog is on the edge of his seat, watching intently. During the the happy scenes, the dog wagged his tail happily. In the sad scenes, the dog would whimper. And in the scary scenes, the dog hid under the seat. When the movie was over, the couple approached the dog owner. The wife said “We can’t believe how much your dog enjoyed the movie.” The dog’s owner replied “Me either. He didn’t like the book.”

Cheap cow...

The only cow in a small town in Northern Italy stopped giving milk. Then the town folk found they could buy a cow in Sicily quite cheaply. So, they brought the cow over from Sicily. It was absolutely wonderful. it produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.

They bought a bull to mate with the cow to get more cows, so they’d never have to worry about their milk supply again. They put the bull in the pasture with the cow but whenever the bull tried to mount the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull, and he was never able to do the deed. The people were very upset and decided to go to the local veterinarian, Dr. Santucchi, who was very wise, tell him what was happening and ask his advice.

“Whenever the bull tries to mount our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. If he attempts it from the one side, she walks away to the other side.”

The veterinarian rubbed his chin thoughtfully and pondered this before asking, “Did you by chance, buy this cow in Sicily?”

The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned that they had brought the cow over from Sicily. “You are truly a wise veterinarian,” they said. “How did you know we got the cow from Sicily?”

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eyes, “My wife is from Sicily.”

 

Thanks for dropping in today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face… Debby and Sally.