Welcome to the series of Posts from Your Archives and I will be sharing posts from the SECOND six months of 2023 from your archives.
This current series is now closed to submissions but there will be a new series to participate in later in the year.
This is the first post from the archives of one of my favourite authors Jacqui Murray who has captured the imagination of the readers of her pre-historic series. It used to be that only the rich and famous (sometimes infamous) wrote about their lives but today this genre has been opened up to everyone who would like to share their path in life. Our ancestors are inspiring, their stories compelling and can also be heartbreaking. In this post Jacqui celebrates the genre and also offers some great tips on how to write about your life in a way that engages the reader. Delighted to be mentioned along with Sam….
In the USA, August 31st is We Love Memoirs Day a day when memoir readers and authors come together to chat. I’m a few days early, but I didn’t want to miss it! I don’t write memoirs, but I have read many great ones. Here are a few I’ve read and reviewed (in alpha order):
Ankur Mithal’s What Happens in Office Stays in Office–an intimate view of business life in India
Betsy Kerekes’ Be A Happier Parent or Laugh Trying–about parenting without tears
Christy Teglo’s Weathered: Finding Strength on the John Muir Trail about her novice-but-successful trek of one of nature’s difficult trails
DG Kaye’s many books discussing lessons she’s learned throughout her storied life
J.Q. Rose’s Arranging a Dream–-how she built a successful business though she was a newbie
Jacqui Murray (that’s me) Building a Midshipman about my daughter’s four years from HS frosh to USNA Midshipman
Liesbet Collaert’s book, Plunge, about living an unusual life
Miriam Hurdle’s The Winding Road: A Journey of Survival–her survival story against the killer cancer
Pete Springer’s They Call Me Mom about his experiences as a teacher
Sally Cronin’s amazing book about a dog she loved named Sam
For many, the one book they have inside of them is a memoir. If you decide to take up this writing genre, here are some tips:
- Make sure the topic of your memoir is interesting. Most people’s lives aren’t. True, the writer’s skill can make it so, but what will inspire readers to pick up the tome? You need a hook–maybe you’re Octo Mom. Or Amoo Hadij who hasn’t taken a bath for over 60 years. The theme must make people turn the page.
- Write in first person, from the author’s POV.
- NPR’s William Zinsser says memoir authors should “think small” (you don’t have to provide all the details) and make a series of “reducing decisions” (same idea). And–‘be yourself’, ‘think freely’.
- According to literary agent, Barbara Doyen, a memoir questions “what happened and come(s) to some kind of new understanding or lesson learned by it. The author shows us how he or she was affected by this experience, how it has profoundly changed the way (s/)he sees the world. And by extension, reading the book will change the way the reader sees the world.”
- The unique voice of the person telling the story should be human, approachable, and not sound like a ‘writer’.
- Write narrative non-fiction, but in story form. This is similar to creative non-fiction which uses the characteristics of fiction to make nonfiction more interesting.
- Write about event(s) in your life without feeling like you must sum up your existence.
- Sometimes, memories are difficult to uncover. Heather Sellers, author of You Don’t Look Like Anyone I Know, suggests you just start writing. It’ll come.
- Gaps in the history don’t matter in a memoir. Just get to the next part that deals with your theme.
- Writing a memoir will hurt people. It can’t be avoided. They’ll disagree with your memory and that’ll upset them. Be prepared.
- Yes, you can get sued for what you write in a memoir. Consider what you’re writing, your purpose, before publishing. Consider consequences and if you’re willing to face them. Consider whether you’d prefer to hide real names and focus on the event.
- In memoirs, ’emotional truth’ is more important than ‘factual truth’. Understand the difference.
- Readers don’t connect with whining. Be substantive.
- You are the protagonist in your memoir, what William Zinnser calls the ‘tour guide’.
- Be honest. Don’t sugar coat, don’t tweak. Represent your memories honestly, in the raw. See what comes out.
- Know how to tell a story. Don’t include the boring stuff readers will skip. Only include the meat.
If you have written a memoir, add it to the comments below with a link to where we can find it.
©Jacqui Murray 2023
A selection of books by Jacqui Murray
One of the reviews for Against All Odds
In The Crossroads Trilogy, Jacqui Murray keeps her readers glued to the page (or screen, in my case!) with vivid characters who come alive through her masterful writing.
Fans of the Gears’ fast moving Native American novels will enjoy Murray’s style, which provides enough technical detail to make her stories realistic without distracting us from the storyline; we are given glimpses of prehistoric lifestyles and toolmaking that make sense in the context presented, not the master class in flint knapping and other skills that we are subjected to in Jean Auel’s books.
I couldn’t wait to move on to each new adventure with Xhosa, Pan Do, Seeker, and all of the other memorable characters in this series! Definitely recommend this, not only to readers of this genre, but anyone who likes a good story well told.
Read the reviews and buy the books: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK – Follow Jacqui: goodreads – Blog: Worddreams – Twitter: @WordDreams
About Jacqui Murray
Jacqui Murray has been teaching K-18 technology for 30 years. She is the editor/author of over a hundred tech ed resources including a K-12 technology curriculum, K-8 keyboard curriculum, K-8 Digital Citizenship curriculum. She is an adjunct professor in tech ed, Master Teacher, webmaster for four blogs, an Amazon Vine Voice, CSTA presentation reviewer, and a contributor to NEA Today. You can find her resources at Structured Learning. Read Jacqui’s tech thrillers, To Hunt a Sub and Twenty-four Days here on Amazon Kindle. Also, read her new series, Man vs. Nature, starting with Born in a Treacherous Time–also on Kindle.
Thanks for dropping in today and I hope you are leaving with some books.. thanks Sally.
Thanks Jacqui. For me, this is incredible timing. Sunday afternoon, grounded by a thunderstorm, internet off, – a roll of paper appears…( blog) Not my memoir, but that of a now dead senior – in Australia., mostly key world events, from a childhood perspective, and family opposition to chosen partners. Constant emails now to Australian cousins – where can we go with this.
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Wow. Coincidence? Or something else? Interesting, Esther.
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Sounds like the bones of a fascinating story Esther and well worth pursuing…xx
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Hi Sally,
We must *- Jugging time zones, UK, South Australia, this is our story – including a teenaged millworker suffragette. the grief of a stillborn baby, and spirited breaking of racial and religious rules.
Esther
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Definitely needs to be told.. ♥
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Such valuable tips, Jacqui not only for memoir writing but also, I think for writing narrative non-fiction. A a useful collection of memoirs. ❤
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Thanks Carol ♥
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I have often wondered if your book, Lilac Notebook, has some personal in it for you. What a powerhouse of a book that never lets go.
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Thanks, Jacqui. I think that probably every writing has something personal in it. The Alzheimer’s theme was drawn from the volunteer work which I did for Alzheimer’s patients.
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While I’m quite familiar with Jacqui, I hadn’t realized just how many books she’s written! Many thanks for the share, Sally 🙂
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Thanks Nicholas x
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I started with two military-ish thrillers (thanks to my two military children and their dedication to making sure I got details right), but then moved to my passion for early man. That’s probably where I’ll be for about six more books!
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Wonderful advice, Jacqui! Thanks for sharing, Sally.
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Thanks very much Beem x
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Thanks, Beem. Apologies for the delay in commenting. I am gobsmacked how many love memoirs! So thankful Sally republished this article.
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Good post with plenty of information from Jacqui, and it is particularly nice to see so many names of writers I know and follow. Congratulations to them all!
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Thanks Olga ♥
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I need to lean on the talent of others for this genre in particular. I have no skill in this area though I really enjoy the books I read!
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Jacqui does a great job sharing the details that make up a genre. This was a good one, Sally. Excellent share. I enjoy reading memoirs, but I don’t think I could write one. Just the thought of it is intimidating. I admire those who can and do share their experiences, especially when they share them with heart and/or humor.
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Thanks Diana and I am hoping you will be too busy bringing us another fantasy to write a memoir lol… ♥♥
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LOL. I’m working on it!
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I couldn’t write one, either. I would have said I didn’t pick many to read and then I saw all the ones I picked and enjoyed. Good grief! Done by the right person, they are great.
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I agree, Jacqui. I don’t think of myself as a memoir reader, but then I read them and think they’re great. Lol. You and I can stick with writing fiction. 🙂
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Good advice, Jacqui, and thanks for the Zinnser link. I have read at least four of his books–he even wrote a book titled “Spring Training,” about the Pittsburgh Pirates spring training in 1988. It ended on opening day at 3 Rivers Stadium and I was there!
Jeff
https://fromarockyhillside.com
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Thanks very much for joining the conversation.
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Didn’t know that about Zinnser, Jeff. The Pirates were my favorite team growing up (the 60’s). Thanks for those memories.
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Seems like good common sense advice. Great tips and post.
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Thank you! Researching for this post made me like memoirs a lot.
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I agree Craig.. sound advice…have a good weekend.x
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Great archive post from Jacqui, Sally.
“Make sure the topic of your memoir is interesting. Most people’s lives aren’t. True, the writer’s skill can make it so, but what will inspire readers to pick up the tome?“
Having just written a memoir I hate to as but hope mine didn’t bore the masses, did it? Don’t answer that. 😂😂
I can attest to this… it’s never the intention but it happens. In this case it was my dad so I didn’t invite him to my book launch. lol
Writing a memoir will hurt people. It can’t be avoided. They’ll disagree with your memory and that’ll upset them. Be prepared.
🥹😉💓
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As one who reads your blog, I can say there is nothing boring about you, Cindy. I don’t think a full book of your memories would be any different.
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Oh you are very kind, Jacqui! Thank you so very much for that endorsement💕💓🙏🏼
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Thanks for sharing Cindy and your truth may always differ from those around you. When I wrote mine I had an ex husband who I went on the run from. It was 24 years later but I deliberately kept that part of my life vague and my name had changed. I am sure your memoir didn’t bore the masses…. ♥♥
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I remember this post and it’s great to see it again. And I agree that we are fortunate to live in a time when ordinary people can write amazing memoirs! Thanks for sharing, Sally!
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Thanks very much Jan.. ♥♥
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I liked discovering that in my research, Jan, and it makes sense, doesn’t it? How we react to what could be considered normal events can be entirely different from others and helpful for people to read. I enjoyed getting to know this genre better.
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An excellent post, Jacqui. Thanks Sally.
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Thanks John..hugsx
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Thanks, John. In your case, it could be about your darling dogs. I’d read that book.
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Thank you, Jacqui. Maybe some day I will write a dog book.
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That is excellent advice. It makes a lot of sense. I’ve read Miriam Hurdle’s The Winding Road and I loved it. I have Building a Midshipman and will start reading it soon. I’ve ordered Pete Springer’s They Call Me Mom. It was a great review for Against All Odds. I will eventually order it, but I’ve ordered book #2 in the crossroads series, the quest for home. I am looking forward to reading these books.
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You have some great reading ahead Thomas… enjoy your weekend. x
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Yes you are right. Have a great weekend you too Sally.
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Miriam’s book is definitely a stand-out in its category–surviving cancer. Mine–Building a Midshipman–is my daughter’s story of an ordinary girl achieving the unachievable–entry into a premier University. When I realized how she did it, I thought a lot of other students could benefit from her experience.
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Two amazing authors under one cyber roof. I love it!
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Plus….all our memoir authors…..
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♥
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Thanks Sandra and have a wonderful weekend. ♥
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Ha! You do have a way with words, Sandra!
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Excellent considerations for someone thinking about writing memoir!
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And probably why I never will (among other reasons!)
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I won’t either.
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Great to hear Liz and I hope you do… hugsx
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I’m not planning to write a memoir, although I have always liked the personal narrative.
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Thank you Sally for introducing us to such an amazing author. I thoroughly enjoyed the post, the fabulous list, and learning there is actually a day that commemorates memoirs. Who knew? Jacqui sounds like a very talented writer. I’m headed over to Amazon to check her out. Hugs, C
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Thank you! My books are a tiny bit memoir–of relatives I never knew but wish I did.
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Thanks Cheryl and I can highly recommend Jacqui’s books. They will have you looking at our ancestors in a whole new light. ♥
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I remember this post! Yay! Happy to see it again. I was so tickled to have been included too. Thanks, Jacqui! Thanks, Sally!
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You have the most amazing material in your life for a memoir. You should write a series.
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Thank you, Jacqui. I kind of thought I was already. It’s called: my blog. 😛
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I guess people turn blogs into books, though, huh? Hmm. I may keep this in mind when the story is closer to complete. 🙂
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The stuff you have in your blog about Martial Arts, parenting, struggling and overcoming–I wonder if that’s anywhere else. You might find a ready audience as a memoir sort of MA book
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Interesting idea. Is it cheating if I mostly just publish stuff that’s already on my blog?
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Not even a little bit.
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Delighted you enjoyed reading again… have a lovely weekend.. x
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You as well! Thanks!
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These are great tips, thank you ❤ Also, I never knew there was a “We Love Memoirs” day! I belong to a fabulous group of memoir readers and writers on Facebook called We Love Memoirs – I’m going to rush off and tell them I was today years old when I learned we have a whole day dedicated to us 🙂
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I was pretty excited to find this, too. Most genres don’t have their own dedicated day.
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Thanks Sally and delighted to share this celebration of memoirs…♥
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Thank you for shared all very useful tips and book recommendations. Each of these books is a great blueprint to write about your own life. There are so many different life stories told and everyone leads to a good end. Best wishes, Michael
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People are fascinating. None two of us alike.
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Thanks very much Michael… glad you enjoyed.. hugsx
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I always change names if I’m writing anything that could cause someone to think they recognize an event or situation I’m writing about (even in fiction where I might use something that really happened). I change as much as I can about the identity as long as it doesn’t affect the story. I heard that in one famous book many townspeople were angry with the author because they recognized themselves, but I’m sure he protected himself by changing names and identifying characteristics.
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I had to do the same in my ‘fictionalised’ version of all my odd jobs. I do think that most of those I wrote about in my earlier jobs as a teenager are probably not with us any longer. xx
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There is always a small chance that someone may recognize part of a scene (or think they do), so I think it’s a safe way to go. I changed the body type and as many other features I could think of for one of my characters and there were still people who thought they might have met someone who behaved like my character, but he was physically unidentifiable. (Best to be on the safe side.)
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Always a good plan Anneli.. x
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That is a good point. Maybe that’s why I write about people from so long ago, no one will recognize them.
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Or will they? I know a few modern day Neanderthals.
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What a valuable list of sound advice, Jacqui! While my story is an emotional truth, I did some research to make sure certain information, such as the type of blood transfusion I received, is factual. Thank you for sharing Jacqui’s post from her archives, Sally!
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Your memoir was an inspiring read Miriam and left me feeling I had been invited into your life.. ♥
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Thank you so much, Sally. That’s the highest praise. ❤️
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There are a lot of books from cancer survivors, but yours stands out Miriam. I hope everyone who needs to discovers it.
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I’ve read some, Jacqui! As you said, some of them are not written as stories.
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Thank you for sharing this post, Sally, it really is a good one 💚
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Glad you enjoyed as much as I did Robbie. Have a lovely weekend. ♥
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I loved having a chance to mention favorite memoirs many may not have heard of.
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Yes, I saw have you brought those in. I have started doing this when the opportunity presents itself too. I learned it from you 😉
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🙂
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This is a valuable list. Very seldom do writers offer advice about how to write a memoir. Even though I changed the names of the students involved, I knew others would be able to recognize the real person based on the story. Not wanting to be sued and also because I wanted to be sensitive to sharing anything too personal, I reached out to those involved in advance to garner their permission to include their stories.
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Great suggestions, Pete. That is a difficult part of memoirs because other family members might disagree, cause problems. Yikes! Thanks for the comment about your experience.
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A wise move Pete and your book was an excellent example of a well crafted memoir.. hugsx
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Great post, Jacqui 🙂 I did do a memoir and will redo it at some point or do another one. Great information to consider for writing one.
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I don’t gravitate to memoirs but seem to always enjoy the ones I read. That peak into what makes us us is fascinating.
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Thanks Denise ♥
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I love Jacqui’s books! I’ve read all of her early man series and her military thrillers. She’s a skilled writer. She kept me glued to the pages! I can’t wait for her new series about the Neanderthal! Thanks so much for sharing Jacqui’s post. 💖
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Thanks very much Colleen and I am in the queue for her next book too.. hugsx
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Thanks so much, Sally. I can’t wait! xx
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Thank you, Colleen! You are a wonderful boost to my day!
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You’re so welcome. I enjoy your books!
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Hi Jacqui. I’ll admit that I’ve spent a lot of time reading memoirs over the last year as I delve into writing my own. But I have to say that I am totally piqued by your Man vs. Nature series and I think it’s time for me to take a break from non-fiction. 🙂 Thanks very much for your spot-on tips. They are excellent. They make me feel like I am on a pretty good path so far, but it’s tough finding the balance of getting out the story and keeping the readers’ interest. Thank you!
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Thanks Melanie and I do recommend Jacqui’s books am sure you will find them riveting reading. xx
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I do the same, Melanie–read voraciously in my genre as I prepare a book. It puts me in the mood.
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I like hearing that Jacqui. It has been helpful in many ways. Plus, I’ve learned about the details and differences in the lives of many women and it’s fascinating.
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Thanks for the memoir tips. I’ve never tried to write one, but I’m not opposed to it.
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Tapping into my prehistory is as close as I’ll ever get! Thanks for visiting, Priscilla.
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Thanks Priscilla, perhaps one day… I found keeping a journal very helpful and then one day a few years later it turned into a book.. xx
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Thank you for hosting me, Sally. I am honored to be here with your community. It’s only 6:45 am and I’m already having a great time!
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🙂 Forgot to click ‘new comments’
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xx
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My pleasure Jacqui, I knew this post would get them talking. Thanks for inviting me to delve in your archives..♥
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Thanks very much for the great intro Jacqui and plug for my books you have reviewed.. a lovely way to start the weekend. ♥
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Bestow my heart. A wonderfully informative post from Jacqui on memoir writing. She hit all 16 excellent points. And out of all them, I will say, as a memoir writer, number 10 is the scariest. It is painstaking to write about familiar people, and cover our basis, hoping not to get sued. It’s a dance.
And thank you so much to Jacqui for mentioning my books. ❤ xx
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You put the soul in memoirs, Debby. There’s no way I’d write an article on that genre without mentioning you!
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I am so humbled Jacqui. Thank you for that. ❤
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A dance you perform wonderfully Debby ♥♥
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Aw shucks, thanks so very much Sal ❤ xxx
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♥♥
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Good advice there.
thanks for sharing.
My memoirs have been accounts of events, recollections and diary accounts… it helps to get it off your chest and on paper, helps to recall… where it goes from there? Who knows?
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Agreed. Sometimes, what sounds ‘normal’ is extraordinary through the eyes of the storyteller. BTW, love your books, the graphics. I have no idea what a ‘supply teacher’ is. Is that what we Americans call a substitute teacher?
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Thank you Jacqui, yes a supply teacher is indeed a substitute teacher. Not everyones cup of tea, but it works for me.
As to storytelling, I was lucky to have had an Aunt who was a great storyteller, having worked in Sweden, Lapland and Liberia in Africa. Her stories certainly had my attention.
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Thank you! I’m smarter today thanks to you!
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Well worth thinking about Sue, always interest in other people’s lives ♥
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Great post, Jacqui. Your advice is right-on! I’ve read several of the memoirs you’ve highlighted and loved them. Writing a memoir is an art requiring plenty of soul-searching and delicacy. Finding the balance and embracing the emotions that the writing evokes is part of the writing journey. ❤️
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Thank you, Sally, for featuring Jacqui’s post. ❤️
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I found it very interesting Gwen.. ♥
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I admit, I selected that list because they were ones I’d read. I wouldn’t call myself a memoir reader, yet I loved all of those!
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Thanks very much Gwen… ♥
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Jacqui is amazing!
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I agree 100% GP … enjoy your weekend.
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Back atcha!
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👍
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Great and useful points on writing memoirs. Jacqui. Thanks for pulling this out of the archives, Sally. I put together a short story collection based on my memories called You Can Take The Girl From The Prairie. It was an interesting experience.
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Thanks Darlene and you did an amazing job ♥
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Thank you so much for saying that!!
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♥
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Darlene, I enjoyed your Girl From the Prairie book!
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Thanks, Joy!
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An excellent example of memoir. Down here in America, we rarely think of Canada as the home of cowboys and cattle wrestling–which is one of the ideas that makes your memoir great.
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What a great article, Jacqui. I don’t think I’d ever be brave enough to write a memoir.
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I know what you mean Toni, especially if you are including references to others… I found it a challenge to write about certain times in my life in my weight loss book. ♥
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Me, either, Toni. I don’t have any events in my background I think would help people grow and that’s critical to memoirs.
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No memoir yet, but I’m up to “maybe.” Depends on whether I can do enough with a compelling theme so folks will want to turn the pages!
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I am sure they will Joy… ♥
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That is the crux of the matter, innit. Thanks, Joy.
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