Firstly, some funnies from Debby Gies and her neighbour Marilyn who has donated her humour for our enjoyment followed by some funnies from Sally.
D.G. Writes is where you will find an archive full of wonderful posts across several subjects including writing tips, social issues and book reviews.
My thanks to Debby and Marilyn for sharing these with us.
D. G. Kaye – Buy: Amazon US – And: Amazon UK Blog: D.G. Writes – Goodreads: D.G. Kaye on Goodreads – Twitter: @pokercubster
Check out Debby’s latest Travel Column: Cruising – Part One
Now for some funnies from Sally….
Watch out for ducks.
Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, ‘We only have one rule here in heaven. Don’t step on the ducks!’
So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and, although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one.
Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St Peter chains them together and says, ‘Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!’
The next day, the second woman steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn’t miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman.
The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps. She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on. Very tall with long eyelashes and very muscular.
St Peter chains them together without saying a word.
The happy woman says, ‘I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?’
The guy says, ‘I don’t know about you, but I stepped on a duck.
Estate Planning
My buddy, Marv, was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. He knew he would inherit a fortune once his sickly father died.
Marv wanted two things: to learn how to invest his inheritance and to find a wife to share his fortune.
One evening at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away.
“I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her, “but in just a few years, my father will die, and I’ll inherit 20 million dollars.”
Impressed, the woman obtained his business card. Two weeks later, she became his stepmother. Women are so much better at estate planning than men.
Thank you for joining us today and we hope you are leaving with a smile on your face.. Debby and Sally.
Thanks! Cheers!
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Glad you enjoyed Pamela.. have a good week..x
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Fantastic, ladies! I’m passing these on! We all need a bit of a chuckle these days!
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Great Olga and delighted to have shared…hugsxx
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I love these.
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Thanks very much Jamie and have a good week. x
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So funny!
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Thanks Jennie..hugsx
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You’re welcome, Sally!
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loved the cockroach and bank memes.
got a good chuckle out of the ugly men and women, as well as the step mom!
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Thanks Jim.. who knew ducks could cause so much trouble lol.. hugsx
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gives a new meaning to when someone yells “DUCK!!”
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lol x
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I love the grumpy old man meme! That’ll take those young whippersnappers down a peg . . .
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Lol.. I seem to be fast approaching a similar personality default .. xxx
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😀
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These were splendid, ladies. The mask and the ducks took my breath away with laughter. Many thanks. Hugs.
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Great to hear thanks William.. hugsxx
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A lovely bunch of cheer Sally. I recently joined Tiktok and am having fun being silly on there! It’s a new social media for me (which I was initially resistant to, but surprisingly am finding it fun!)
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Great Marje.. some newer sites can be disappointing but I hear that Tiktok is fun…have a good weekend.. hugsx
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And to you too Sally. x
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So wonderful. All with a very thoughtful message. Lol I think the one with the cockroaches should be tested. 🙂 xx Michael
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Lol…hugsx
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Loved them all, but my favorite has to be the last one about the bank calling to see if your credit card was stolen?
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Great thanks Pete…I think that would happen to me if I did that xx
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Reblogged this on NEW BLOG HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
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Thanks for sharing the funnies Michael..hugsx
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Sal, your jokes were hilarious!!! And that first meme cracks me up as it reminds me of my first week here. Every time I’d go to the elevator and wait for it (I’m on the 25th floor), it would come and I’d realize I forgot my mask. LOL ❤
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OMG… hope it doesn’t break down to often Debby lol.. imagine carrying the tequila up 25 floors..♥♥
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Don’t get me started with elevator stories. They will be in my featured stories too. LOL. This place is crazy with ‘pretending to work’ people and ‘no elevator service’ shenanigans. You know …manana time! 🙂 xox
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lol.. and sunshine and tequila.. ♥
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Of course! 🙂 ❤
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Hilarious, as always! I loved the first one especially — hopefully, one day soon, we won’t need to fret about those masks. Thank you ladies for such a fun read. 🤗
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Thanks very much Gwen and delighted you enjoyed ♥♥
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Lol Gwen, the stairs and mask is too relatable. 🙂 ❤
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Hi Sally and Debby – hilarious. Loved those stairs. Toni x
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Thanks Toni.. delighted to hear..hugsx
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Hilarious right? ❤
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Well done, Maids of Mirth and Marilyn.
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Thanks very much John.. hugsx
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Thanks so much John. 🙂
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😊
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These are great! Thanks for sharing, ladies! xo
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Thanks Jill hugsx
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❤
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Thanks for the smiles!
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Thanks Denise..hugsx
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❤
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I can relate the mask one. Even in the parking lot, waking back is always longer than waking forward. The estate planning is excellent. Thank you, ladies! 😄
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I am with you on that Miriam and I was tickled by the estate planning too..hugsx
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Wonderful finds of the funnies, Sally!
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Thanks Miriam…have a lovely weekend…hugsx
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You too, Sally. 💖
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Lol Miriam. I know that mask one only too well! 🙂 ❤
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More top of the range funnies! That mountain of steps was impressive even without the mask gag! I’m tempted to have a go at frightening the new generation, and I loved the neat punchlines for the Ducks and Estate Planning. Many thanks! xx
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Glad you enjoyed thanks Alex ♥
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Lol Trish, all my favs too. Great chuckles today, glad you enjoyed. ❤
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You’ve outdone yourselves today, ladies! Brilliant, well done 🙂
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Delighted you enjoyed Jemima.. thank you hugsx
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Lol, thanks Jemima. 🙂
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A great selection! Love the estate planning…
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Lol.. poor guy he never stood a chance…hugsx
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Not for a second!
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♥
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🙂 🙂
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Wonderful, wonderful. I don’t know which one is the funniest, ladies. Thanks for brightening my day.
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Great to hear thank Viv…hugsx
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Lol Viv, glad you enjoyed. 🙂
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It’s Comic Relief tomorrow and I’ve just come across a few Monstrous Red Nose Jokes.
Enjoy.
How do you greet a two-headed monster?
Hello, hello.
What’s the difference between a monster on a moped and a monster Red Nose?
One’s a hairy scooter; the other is a scary hooter.
What do monsters eat for breakfast?
Shredded feet.
How do monsters know when ghosts are lying?
They can see right through them.
What do monsters serve at parties?
Jelly and I- scream!
What do monsters eat that’s good for their teeth?
Dentists.
Why did the monsters fall in love?
It was love at first fright.
What’s the best way to speak to a monster?
From a long way away.
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That will do nicely thanks Sue.. we don’t have regular television but will keep an eye on the news to see how they do tomorrow night… thanks for the funnies…hugsxx
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Lolol Sue 🙂 🙂
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Brilliant, ladies! Snorted out loud at the mask one. 🙂 That would be just my luck. And the cockroach ploy was genius!
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It would be just my luck too Jan lol.. glad you enjoyed ♥
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Been there Sal! 🙂 🙂 xx
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♥♥
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❤
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Lol Jan. I just left comment to Sally on that mask one. LOLOL so relatable! 🙂 x
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OMG! These were awesome! I’m still laughing at the mask one. Hilarious! And the ducks and estate planning were fantastic. Thanks, Debby and Sally! 🙂
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Thanks Yvette.. very happy to hear you enjoyed.. hugsxx
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Lol Yvette, my 3 favs too! 🙂
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