Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Naval Intelligence and Tell it to the Marines

My father served in the Royal Navy for 37 years plus an extra ten in a civilian capacity.  There were good natured jokes and rivalry between the senior service, army and Royal Air Force.  Here are a few that I have sourced from archives and various sites.


 During a naval exercise in the Mediterranean, a signaller rushed up to the bridge and said, ‘Captain, this message just came in.’

‘Read it out,’ said the captain.

‘Well, sir, I….’ the signalman stammered.

‘Just read it out man…now!’ snapped the captain.

‘Right, sir,’ said the signalman. ‘It reads: What the hell do you think you are doing, you stupid, blundering idiot? You’re not fit to be in command!’

‘Yes, well…’ said the captain. ‘Have that decoded at once.’


Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, “Why do you want to join the Navy, son?” “My father said it’d be a good idea, sir.” “Oh? And what does your father do?” “He’s in the Army, sir.”


A Navy man walks into a bar, gives the bartender a conspiratorial wink and says, “Quick, pour me a drink, before the trouble starts.” The bartender pours a drink and watches as the Sailor downs it in one gulp.

The Sailor slams the glass down on the bar and says, “Quick, give me another one before the trouble starts.”

The bartender pours another glass and the Sailor drinks it as quickly as he had the first. The Sailor pauses, lets out a belch and demands a third drink ‘before the trouble starts.’

After several rounds of this, the bartender says, “Look Sailor, you’ve been talking about trouble for ten minutes. Just when is this ‘trouble’ going to start?”

The sailor looks at the bartender and grins. “The trouble starts just as soon as you figure out that I don’t have any money.”

Old Ironsides

The USS Constitution, Old Ironsides, as a combat vessel carried 48,600 gallons of fresh water for her crew of 475 officers and men. This was sufficient to last six months of sustained operations at sea. However, let it be noted that according to her log:

“On July 22, 1798, the USS Constitution sailed from Boston with a full complement of 475 officers and men, 48,600 gallons of fresh water, 7,400 cannon shot, 11,600 pounds of black powder and 79,400 gallons of rum.”

Her mission: “To destroy and harass English shipping.”

Making Jamaica on 6 October, 1798 she took on 826 pounds of flour and 68,300 gallons of rum. Then she headed for the Azores, arriving there 12 November, 1798. She provisioned with 550 pounds of beef, and 64,300 gallons of Portuguese wine. On 18 November, 1798 she set sail for England. In the ensuing days, she defeated five British men-of-war, and captured and scuttled 12 English merchantmen, salvaging only the rum aboard each.

By 26 January, 1799 her powder and shot were exhausted. Nevertheless, although unarmed, she made a night raid up the Firth of Clyde in Scotland. Her landing party captured a whisky distillery and transferred 40,000 gallons of a single malt Scotch aboard by dawn. Then, she headed home.

The USS Constitution arrived in Boston on 20 February, 1799 with no cannon shot, no food, no powder, no rum, no wine, no whisky and 38,600 gallons of stagnant water.

Overseas posting

A newly married sailor was informed by the Navy that he was going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the Pacific for a year. A few weeks after he got there he began to miss his new wife, so he wrote her a letter.

“My love,” he wrote, “we are going to be apart for a very long time. Already I’m starting to miss you and there’s really not much to do here in the evenings. Besides that, we’re constantly surrounded by young attractive native girls. Do you think if I had a hobby of some kind I would not be tempted? ”

So his wife sent him back a harmonica saying, “why don’t you learn to play this?”

Eventually his tour of duty came to an end and he rushed back to his wife. “Darling” he said, “I can’t wait to get you into bed so that we make passionate love!”

She kissed him and said, “First let’s see you play that harmonica.”

Tell it to the Marines.

An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, “Wanna hear a MARINE joke?”

The guy next to him replies, “Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I’m 6′ tall, 200 lbs, and I’m a MARINE. The guy sitting next to me is 6’2″ tall, weighs 225, and he’s a MARINE. The fella next to him is 6’5″ tall, weighs 250, and he’s also a MARINE. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?”

The Airman says, “Nah, I don’t want to have to explain it three times.”


Thanks for dropping in today and please feel free to share… Sally


Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – A Summer Party, Music, Myths, Food, Great Books and Laughter…You are invited.

I never thought that I would say that I was grateful for some rain this last week.. but I am. Hopefully not too little, too late for farmers whose crops have stalled. It is a lovely afternoon and have been enjoying some sunshine.. so have my feather family who bring me constant amusement.

My best buy this summer was a metre square three inch seed tray that has become the swimming pool for a wide variety of birds. The bird bath and seed tree we bought last Christmas has also been inundated and preparing meals has never been so much fun. Sally’s Cafe and Bird Spa….

At times there are at least 50 or more birds on the feeder and in the baths with everyone joining in together. The starlings are very keen and spend ages in there splashing around, but until recently I had only seen the sparrows taking dust baths. Until this week when they have clearly picked up a few tricks from the starlings, and today there were little birds having a high old time since early morning and they are still at it now.

Normally when the crows come down the other birds scatter. The crows are not acrobatic enough to use the seeders as intended, so they have worked out another method. One stands on the metal ring and bangs his head on the seeders so that they scatter the seed on the ground below for his mates. However, like elegant pole dancers they can be found hanging upside down on the fat ball holder rocking back and forth as they try to get a morsel. They usually come in a group of rowdy teenagers, but we have got a crow who is rather bedraggled and skinny who started coming down on his own. Much to our surprise the starlings, sparrows and tits ignore him and hang around, and I even saw him in the pool with three starlings this morning.

The only bird who is not welcome is the sparrow hawk who sits on branches in the hedge and pounces on my babies… They are protected in Ireland, but there is nothing to say that I cannot come out and shout at him and wave my arms around like a mad woman. It seems to have discouraged him but my neighbour tells me it spends a lot of time in her garden.. ah well…

The Smorgasbord End of Summer Party Weekend 25th – 26th August

Thank you for such an amazing response.  There are four posts over the weekend with the themes Brunch, Afternoon Tea, Dinner on the Saturday and Sunday Lunch. I am delighted to say that 3 spaces left for Brunch, 1 space in the afternoon tea,  and 2 for Sunday Lunch. The details are in the post and if you would like to be promoted then please do so quickly…

Sally’s Cafe and Bookstore – update and new promotional opportunities.

I have updated the directory with the blogger daily and other opportunities to promote authors in the cafe so please take a read.  Also in the second post.. how to put your books on the shelves for the first time.

Anyway on with the posts that you might have missed this week and as always a huge thank you for William Price King and Carol Taylor for supplying the music and the food this week, and to you for dropping by.

The Music Column with William Price King – Summer Jazz with Diana Krall

Writer in Residence rewind – Ionia by Paul Andruss.

I thought you might enjoy revisiting some of Paul’s ealier posts from the beginning of 2017 as he is on his extended break.. This week Ionia – Gods and Myths.


The Food and Cookery Column with Carol Taylor.

This week Carol makes good use of the spices she mixed last week to create some show stopping meals for the family.

Getting to Know You.

Delighted to welcome children’s author, poet and master confectioner Robbie Cheadle as guest on the Getting to Know You interview. A very busy mum who works full-time but still finds time to write, blog, and support so many of us here.

Personal Stuff

Beatrix is about to end her very long and successful theatre career but what lies beneath the mask?

From early man through to the current day, the birthright of one particular family is carried from generation to generation.

Letters from America – 1985-1987 – My parent’s visit – Anniversary party and nearly lights out.

Sally’s Drive Time Playlist – 1982 – Dionne Warwick and Survivor

Sally’s Cafe and Bookstore – New on the Shelves.

Author Updates #reviews

Blogger Daily

Health Column

The components of our blood and Anaemia.


There has been a dramatic increase in cases of measles in some of the countries in Europe and there is a spike in the UK too. The most at risk are those with compromised immune systems and mothers-to-be and infants who have not been vaccinated.

Nutrients the body needs – Phosphorus and bone health

Humour and Afternoon Videos

More weird facts and trivia

The last part of the weird facts and trivia

Thank you very much for spending time here today and for your support.. enjoy the week .. thanks Sally.


Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in the this case Be a Know it All – Part Six.. The Finale

Here is your last list of trivia and weird facts.. and if you are into party games (family ones) then you can always print off the posts and use to baffle your guests…

  1. Eighty percent of 10 year old girls in the USA go on a diet.
  2. Girls have more taste buds than boys. (no wonder we love chocolate more)
  3. In humans, the epidermal layer of skin, which consists of many layers of skin regenerates every 27 days.
  4. In the United States, poisoning is the fourth leading cause of death among children.
  5. Ironically, when doctors in Los Angeles, California went on strike in 1976, the daily number of deaths in the city dropped 18%.
  6. Lack of sleep can affect your immune system and reduce your ability to fight infections
  7. People over the age of fifty will start to lose their dislike for foods that taste bitter.
  8. People that smoke have 10 times as many wrinkles as a person that does not smoke.
  9. Research has indicated that approximately eleven minutes are cut off the life of an average male smoker from each cigarette smoked.
  10. Smiling releases endorphins in the body, which makes people feel better.
  11. The average ear grows 0.01 inches in length every year.
  12. The eight most popular foods to cause food allergies are: milk, eggs, wheat, peanuts, soy, tree nuts, fish, and shellfish.
  13. The human liver performs over 500 functions.
  14. The lining of a person’s stomach is replaced every 36 hours.
  15. The majority of American models are skinnier than 98% of American women.
  16. The sensitivity of a woman’s middle finger is reduced during menstruation.
  17. The slowest growing finger nail is on the thumb nail and the fastest growing is the finger nail on the middle finger.
  18. The stomach can break down goat’s milk faster than the milk of a cow.
  19. There are 400 species of bacteria in the human colon.
  20. There are approximately 45 billion fat cells in an average adult.
  21. There are approximately 9,000 taste buds on the tongue.
  22. There are five million scent receptors located in a human beings nose.
  23. There are more than 640 muscles in the human body.
  24. Women carry more sweat glands than men but men’s sweat glands are more active.
  25. Being unmarried can shorten a man’s life by ten years.
  26. One billion seconds is about 32 years.
  27. The average four year-old child asks over four hundred questions a day.
  28. Ace two three four five six seven eight nine ten jack queen king. Excluding the joker, if you add up the letters in all the names of the cards in the deck (Ace, two, three, four,…,king). the total number of letters is 52, the same as the number of cards in the deck.
  29. Aladdin’s nationality was Chinese.
  30. Each of the suits on a deck of cards represents the four major pillars of the economy in the middle ages: heart represented the Church, spades represented the military, clubs represented agriculture, and diamonds represented the merchant class.
  31. There are 52 cards in a standard deck and there are 52 weeks in a year. There are 4 suits in a deck of cards and 4 seasons in a year. If you add the values of all the cards in a deck (jack=11 queen=12, etc.) you get a total of 365 the same as the number of days in a year.
  32. Ever wonder where the term “Work Smarter…Not Harder” originated? Allan F. Mogensen, the creator of Work Simplification, coined the phrase in the 1930s. The 1990s equivalent term is probably Business Process Re-engineering.
  33. Huckleberry Finn’s remedy for warts was swinging a dead cat in a graveyard at midnight.
  34. If a person counted at the rate of 100 numbers a minute and kept counting for eight hours a day, five days a week, it would take a little over 4 weeks to count to one million and just over 80 years to reach a billion.
  35. In order to sell his sets of Shakespeare door-to-door, David McConnell offered free perfume to his customers. He realized the perfume was more popular and began selling cosmetics door-to-door. This began the company that grew into Avon.
  36. In the first month of the Bell Telephone Company’s existence in 1877, only six telephones were sold.
  37. Roman statues were made with detachable heads, so that one head could be removed and replaced by another.
  38. Since most people are right-handed, the holes on men’s clothes have buttons on the right – to make it easier for men to push them through the holes. Well, that’s easy, but aren’t women mostly right-handed too? Women’s buttons are on the OPPOSITE side so their maids can dress them. When buttons were first used, they were expensive and only wealthy women had them. Since a maid faces the woman she is dressing, having the buttons on the left of the dress places them on the maid’s right.
  39. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan, there was never a recorded Wendy before.
  40. Three teaspoons make up one tablespoon.
  41. When Bell’s patent was sixteen months old, there were 778 telephones in use

Thanks for joining in and hope you are now a Know it All… thanks Sally.

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in this case How to be a Know it All – Weird facts and Statistics Part Five

Welcome to another opportunity to expand your knowledge of trivia and worthless facts…..

  1. According to a booze bill for a celebration party thrown September 15, 1787, the 55 people who were designing the United States Constitution drank 54 bottles of Madeira, 60 bottles of claret, 8 bottles of whiskey, 22 bottles of port, 8 bottles of cider, 12 bottles of beer, and 7 large bowls of alcoholic punch large enough “that ducks could swim in them”. There were 16 musicians at the party. We all know now why the Constitution was signed on the 17th of September instead of the 16th.
  2. In 1980, the yellow pages accidentally listed a Texas funeral home under “Frozen Foods”.
  3. 35% of people who use personal ads are already married.
  4. While performing her duties as queen, Cleopatra sometimes wore a beard.
  5. 1 in 5 Americans cannot say which president is on the $1 bill without looking.
  6. Pigs can become alcoholics.
  7. The Mira e Hotel in Las Vegas has 12 gardeners on its staff to care for artifical plants.
  8. When Italy was founded in 1861, only 3% of Italians spoke Italian fluently.
  9. Daniel Boone detested coonskin caps.
  10. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
  11. Alexander Graham Bell insisted the proper way to answer the phone is “ahoy!”
  12. John Wilkes Booth’s brother once saved the life of Abe Lincoln’s son.
  13. 25% of Americans believe Sherlock Holmes is a real person. (stress on IS, folks!!)
  14. It is against the law to drink beer in Cedar City, Utah, if your shoelaces are untied.
  15. Errol Flynn once worked on an Australian sheep ranch, castrating sheep with his teeth.
  16. Disneyland has the fourth largest navy in the world.
  17. Raccoons, slugs, and ants all love to get drunk.
  18. The Bible is the most shoplifted book in the United States.
  19. Louis XIV bathed once a year.
  20. The NY phone book had 22 Hitlers before WWII. It had 0 after WWII.
  21. Fish can get seasick.
  22. Kentucky produces more whiskey than all the other states combined.
  23. 59% of men and 39% of women say that the remote control has significantly improved their lives.
  24. In Kentucky, it is illegal to marry your wife’s grandmother.
  25. Termites eat wood twice as fast to heavy metal music.
  26. In the 40’s, the Bich pen was renamed Bic for fear Americans would pronounce it “Bitch”.
  27. President Andrew Jackson was not sure if the earth was round or flat.
  28. Mosquitoes prefer blondes.
  29. There was so little dialogue in the original “Mission Impossible” TV show that Peter Graves, the star, once fell asleep in the middle of a scene….and no one noticed.
  30. 52% of Americans say they would rather spend a week in jail than be President of the US.
  31. In 1992, 2,421 people checked into U.S. emergency rooms with injuries involving house plants.
  32. In 1992, 5,840 people checked into U.S. emergency rooms with “pillow-related injuries”.
  33. 15% of women send themselves flowers on Valentine’s Day.
  34. Until 1967, LSD was legal in California.
  35. Russians generally answer the phone by saying “I’m listening.”
  36. In Frackville, Pennsylvania, a woman filed for divorce because her husband insisted on shooting tin cans off her head with a slingshot.
  37. There are about 50 female pro boxers in the U.S.
  38. The average American eats at McDonalds 1,811 times in their lives.
  39. 8% of Americans twiddle their thumbs.
  40. Smokey the Bear has his own zip code, 20252.
  41. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is “screeched.”
  42. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament Building is an American flag.
  43. Barbie’s measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33.
  44. All of the clocks in Pulp Fiction are stuck on 4:20.
  45. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver or purple.
  46. “Dreamt” is the only English word that ends in the letters “MT”.
  47. All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
  48. Almonds are members of the peach family.
  49. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies’ room during a dance. (debateable but Sir Winston could neither confirm or deny and stated  ‘Although present on that occasion, I have no clear recollection of the events leading up to it.’
  50. Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

I hope that you have enjoyed these little pieces of trivia….thanks Sally

Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – Tahini, August predictions and all that Jazz

Welcome to the round up of posts from the week you might have missed. The weather has been a little more variable over the last few days with a couple of days of decent rain which will please the farmers. Still not enough however to prevent a potential feed crisis as with the lack of growth in the fields, animals are having to be given feed that has been stored for next winter.  A very unusual situation for Ireland to be in.

I read today that the met office in the UK expects this level of heat to continue through to October. Whilst lovely for those who love bright sunny days, it does cause difficulties for not just farmer’s but the very young and elderly. There has been a spike in deaths in the last two months that is being blamed on the hot weather and so if you have an elderly relative or neighbour do check that they are staying hydrated. Unfortunately, they do tend to get into the habit of having their cups of tea and glasses of water at regular times irrespective of the weather. Under normal circumstances that can leave some of them with less fluid than they should be taking in, but in this kind of heat it can be dangerous.

August is a time when most summer holidays are enjoyed, so if you are heading out have an amazing time and look forward to hearing about your adventures in posts when you get back. We are staying put and to be honest, with the weather as it is, we are very happy to do so. The traveling to and fro to destinations seems to be more stressful than ever with airline pilot and air traffic control strikes, power outages and computer glitches due to the heat and traffic jams. Keep safe and take water and snacks!

My thanks of course to William Price King and Carol Taylor for their columns this week and to all of you who have been over and liked, commented and shared. It is always appreciated.

Here are the posts from the week.

The Music Column with William Price King – Part Two of the Diana Krall story

The Food and Cookery Column with Carol Taylor

Posts from Your Archives

Carol Taylor shares more fascinating insights into life in Thailand and this week the art of making charcoal which is a primary cooking fuel.

Sunday Interview – Getting to Know You with author Janet Gogerty

Esme’s August Forecast for your zodiac sign.

Personal Stuff

Letters from America.. My parents arrive in Houston to great fanfare.

I decided to participate in the Blue Sky Tag for a little light relief on Friday… and tag some more victims…

Sally’s Drive Time #Music – 1981 – we settle into a chilly Welsh holiday cottage.

What’s in a Name Volume One Short Stories

Anne – Favour and Grace

Alexander – Defender of Men

Sally’s Cafe and Bookstore – New on the Shelves

Author Update

Blogger Daily

Health Column

If you have a teenager going to college in September it is important that you check their meningitis vaccinations are up to date.

How your digestive system deals with a chicken sandwich to boost your immune system.

If you are thinking of becoming Vegan or perhaps someone in your family, it is important to ensure that you are still obtaining all the nutrients you need to be healthy.

Nutrients the body needs – Potassium – High Blood Pressure and Adrenal Glands

Eating Bacon and Cancer – two sides to the story.

Humour and Afternoon Video

50 more weird facts


  • Polar bears are left-handed
  • Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
  • Mark Twain didn’t graduate from elementary school.
  • Proportional to their weight, men are stronger than horses.
  • Pilgrims ate popcorn at the first Thanksgiving dinner

50 more weird facts


  • Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
  • Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
  • The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
  • Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in this case – Be a Know it All – Trivia Part Four.

Here we are with part four of this series and as always I cannot verify the truth of the following statements.. Still when we have finished we should be all great at pub quizzes..


  1. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
  2. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
  3. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
  4. Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
  5. The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
  6. Barbie’s full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
  7. Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
  8. All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn’t like being seen wearing them in public.
  9. Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
  10. Pearls melt in vinegar.
  11. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
  12. The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.
  13. It is possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs.
  14. A duck’s quack doesn’t echo and no one knows why.
  15. The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.
  16. Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word “criminal.” The second? William Jefferson Clinton.
  17. Turtles can breathe through their butts.
  18. The sentence “The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog” uses every letter in the alphabet.
  19. Humans and elephants are the only animals that can stand on their heads.
  20. Researchers say that when a waitress draws a happy face on a check, tips go up 18 %.
  21. Fortune cookies were actually invented in America in 1918 by Charles Jung.
  22. All polar bears are left-handed.
  23. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.
  24. The Mona Lisa by Leonardo da Vinci has no eyebrows.
  25. The word “taxi” is spelled the same in English, German, French, Swedish, & Portuguese.
  26. The Hoover Dam was built to last 2,000 years. The concrete in it will not be fully cured for another 500 years.
  27. In Albania, nodding your head means “no” and shaking your head means “yes.”
  28. In 1875, the director of the U.S. Patent Office resigned, advised that his department should close, and claimed that there was nothing left to invent.
  29. An armadillo crosses a river by holding its breath and walking across the bottom.
  30. Every person has a unique tongue print just like a fingerprint.
  31. Charlie Chaplin once entered a “Charlie Chaplin look-alike” contest while visiting Monte Carlo, and did not win – he only placed third.
  32. During the middle ages, you could be accused of witchcraft if your pets disobeyed you.
  33. Every day, Americans eat an estimated 18 acres of pizza.
  34. Sigmund Freud had an intense fear of ferns.
  35. In ancient Egypt, only Pharaohs were allowed to eat mushrooms.
  36. On average an adult laughs 15 times a day; a child laughs 400 times.
  37. The 100-years War lasted 116 years.
  38. According to the Bible, there were 2 windows on Noah’s ark.
  39. Donald Duck comics were banned from libraries in Finland because he doesn’t wear pants.
  40. Disney animators used Marilyn Monroe’s body as the model for Tinkerbell.
  41. Mosquitoes are more likely to bite you if you’ve just eaten a banana.
  42. Q-tips were invented in the early 1920’s by Polish-born Leo Gerstenzang. The Q stands for quality.
  43. Oscar winner Anthony Hopkins refrained from blinking in all his scenes as Hannibal Lecter in The Silence of the Lambs (1991).
  44. George Washington’s false teeth were made of hippopotamus ivory.
  45. Cats have two sets of vocal cords, one for purring and one for meowing.
  46. In 1955, a book was returned to the Cambridge University library that was 288 years overdue.
  47. Scissors were reportedly invented by Leonardo da Vinci.
  48. Lake Nicaragua is the only freshwater lake in the world that has sharks.
  49. There are 450 different types of cheese in the world, and 240 come from France.
  50. There are the same amount of dimples in an average golf ball as there are ridges in a dime

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in this case how to be A Know it All – weird facts part Three

Here are some more weird and wonderful facts for you to improve your chances of being a trivia pursuit winner..

  1. Polar bears are left-handed
  2. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
  3. Mark Twain didn’t graduate from elementary school.
  4. Proportional to their weight, men are stronger than horses.
  5. Pilgrims ate popcorn at the first Thanksgiving dinner
  6. Your nose and ears never stop growing
  7. Your Eyeballs are the same size when you are born, as when you die!
  8. Jupiter is bigger than all the other planets combined
  9. Hot water is heavier than cold
  10. Starfish have eight eyes–one at the end of each leg
  11. Iceland consumes more Coca-Cola per capita than any other nation
  12. First novel ever written on a typewriter was “Tom Sawyer”.
  13. There are more collect calls on Father’s Day than any other day of the year.
  14. It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs
  15. Men get hiccups more often than woman.
  16. Armadillos can be housetrained.
  17. Vanilla is used to make chocolate.
  18. Montpelier, Vermont, is the only U.S. state capital without a McDonald’s.
  19. Tomatoes and cucumbers are fruits
  20. An average of 13 boxes of Jell-O are purchased every second in the united states.
  21. Almonds are members of the peach family.
  22. 40% of McDonald’s profits come from the sales of “Happy Meals”.
  23. The very first ice cream cone appeared in St. Louis at the 1904 World’s Fair
  24. Did you know…
    The combination “ough” can be pronounced in nine different ways. The following sentence contains them all: “A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful plough man strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed.”
  25. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 18 million courses of antibiotics are prescribed for the common cold in the United States per year. Research shows that colds are caused by viruses. 50 million unnecessary antibiotics are prescribed for viral respiratory infections.
  26. According to the Journal of American Medical Association, as of 1998, more than 100,000 Americans die annually from adverse reactions to prescription drugs.
  27. Although it’s only 2% of our body weight, the brain uses 20% of all oxygen we breathe, 20% of the calories we take in, and 15% of the body’s blood supply.
  28. A passionate kiss uses up 6.4 calories per minute.
  29. 45% of Americans don’t know that the sun is a star.
  30. By age sixty, most people have lost half of their taste buds.
  31. Despite accounting for just one-fiftieth of body weight, the brain burns as much as one-fifth of our daily caloric intake.
  32. Fluoridated toothpaste came about as the result of a discovery made in Naples, Italy in 1802, when local dentists noticed yellowish-brown spots on their patient’s teeth – but no cavities. Subsequent examination revealed that high levels of fluoride in the water caused the spots and prevented tooth decay, and that less fluoride protected teeth without causing the spots. It took a while for the discovery to be implemented; the first U.S. fluoridated water tests didn’t take place until 1915, and Crest, the firth toothpaste with fluoride in it didn’t hit stores until 1956.
  33. People who laugh a lot are much healthier than those who don’t. Dr. Lee Berk at the Loma Linda School of Public Health in California found that laughing lowers levels of stress hormones, and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds have it best – they laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
  34. Smoking makes it almost impossible for a male to have a natural erection and it shrinks the penis. It also reduces the mobility of sperm.
  35. The first known heart medicine was discovered in an English garden. In 1799, physician John Ferriar noted the effect of dried leaves of the common plant, digitalis purpurea, on heart action. Still used in heart medications, digitalis slows the pulse and increases the force of heart contractions and the amount of blood pumped per heartbeat.
  36. The kidneys filter about 500 gallons of blood each day.
  37. The human kidney consists of over 1 million little tubes with a total length of about 40 miles in both kidneys.
  38. The number one cause of blindness in the United States is diabetes.
  39. The most common non-contagious disease in the world is tooth decay.
  40. There are 10 trillion living cells in the human body.
  41. Every hour one billion cells in the body must be replaced.
  42. You can see a candle flame from 50 Kilometres on a clear, dark night. You can hear the tick of a watch from 6 meters in very quiet conditions. You can taste one gram of salt in 500 litres of water (.0001M). You can detect one drop of perfume diffused throughout a three-room apartment. You can detect the wing of a bee falling on your cheek from a height of one centimetre.
  43. Lightning keeps plants alive. The intense heat of lightning forces nitrogen in the air to mix with oxygen, forming nitrogen oxides that are soluble in water and fall to the ground in rain. Plants need nitrates to survive, so without lightning, plants could not live.
  44. Oak trees do not have acorns until they are fifty years old or older.
  45. The giant sequoia, which produces millions of seeds, can take 175 to 200 years to flower. No other organism takes this long to mature sexually.
  46. The primary purpose of growing rice in flooded paddies is to drown the weeds surrounding the young seedlings. Rice can, in fact, be grown in drained areas.
  47. 75-90% of primary physician visits are due to stress
  48. 1 out of every 4 kids in the USA is overweight
  49. Each year in America there are about 300,000 deaths that can be attributed to obesity.
  50. Eating chocolate three times a month helps people live longer as opposed to people who overeat chocolate or do not eat chocolate at all!

Thanks for dropping in and please feel free to pass this on…. Thanks Sally


Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – Summer Jazz, Noodles, Great Books and Mamma Mia!

Welcome to this week’s round up of posts you might have missed. After 9 weeks of glorious sunshine we have had two days of rain and for once it was welcome. The reservoirs will be receiving a top up and although we will have a few partly sunny days next week, there will be more to come.

This week of course there was the blood moon and there were some interesting facts around this particular eclipse that made it all the more disappointing to have thick cloud cover and not to be able to see it. However, the photos online were stunning.

Esme our resident astral forecaster, is going to be talking about it on Thursday when she gives her views on the upcoming month’s events.

The highlight of the week for me has to be going to the movies and my review for Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again is under my personal stuff…. fantastic. Yesterday David and I went to see Mission Impossible: Fallout and that too was well worth going to see. Non-stop action and a danger of choking on your popcorn with some of the stunts. I will review next Saturday in full.

I am busy working on my next writing project having handed off Tales from the Irish Garden for some spit and polish. I will only be on social media from time to time although I have salted the blog with some of the usual posts and some humour.

Also now we have come to the end of Sam, A Shaggy Dog Story, I will be sharing Volume One of What’s in a Name? from next weekend. I hope you will enjoy.

As always a huge thank you for your continued support, it really is very much appreciated.

Here are the posts from the week and I hope you enjoy.

William Price King and the Music Column – Summer Jazz

William is on his usual summer break but we are sharing a previous series and this week part one of the Diana Krall story.

The Food and Cookery Column with Carol Taylor

Carol Taylor outdid herself this week with some wonderful recipes that include noodles.. We tend to think of rice and Italian pasta to accompany our meals but noodles are wonderful and well worth exploring the various kinds available.

Posts from Your Archives – Travel

And Carol Taylor also shares some of her travel experiences around her home of Thailand.. this week Heaven or Hell?


Getting to Know You – The Sunday Interview with award-winning children’s author Janice Spina.

Personal Stuff

Something to Think About – Wills and Probate

This week I saw a newspaper article which follows on from this previous post, regarding the opportunity for banks and solicitors to benefit from your will and from those of your loved ones, leaving you possibly out of pocket for thousands of pounds.

Letters from America – Our first trip to New York

Odd Jobs and Characters – Some of the jobs I left out of the blog tour. – Funeral director’s receptionist.

Drive Time Playlist – Music to get the weekend started – 1980 – ABBA and Dr. Hook

Film Review – Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again

The final part of Sam, A Shaggy Dog Story – Teeth Cleaning and Reflections on My Life.

As Sam’s story has come to an end, here is a short story that I wrote for Annette Rochelle Aben and her family back in 2015 to celebrate Tales from the Garden being released.  The Time Capsule

Sally’s Cafe and Bookstore – New on the Shelves

Author Update – Reviews – Three this week to catch up after the Summer Sale.

Pure Trash Bette Stevens

Blogger Daily – a small selection of blog posts and book reviews I enjoyed during the week.

International Food and travel to Australia and Hong Kong.

History posts from Tony Riches, Sue Vincent and Brain Lageose.

Christmas in July in South Africa, 8 Top adventures to experience in South Africa, and Fish and Chips in Australia.

Travel posts from Sri Lanka with the best experiences to be had and Iceland.. land of the Norsemen

Health Column

Whilst our immune system is on high alert for dangers to our bodies, we need to meet it halfway at least and give it the right tools to do the job effectively. Eating a rubbish diet is not the way to go…nor is taking a handful of supplements!

However many ‘fad’ diets there are littering the Internet, you cannot get away from the fact that if you eat more than you expend in energy…. you put weight on.  I have compiled a fat accumulation table that demonstrates how little treats can add up over a year… and by halving the number you have can have a dramatic effect on your weight.

Some food hacks including Pineapple for bruises and dates and cheese to spice up your love life!

Humour and Afternoon Video

A re-run of some of the weird facts and statistics that almost seem unbelievable!!! But they might help you win that pub quiz.

  1. Mosquitoes are attracted to the color blue twice as much as to any other color.
  2. If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.

Part two of the Know it All series….

  1. No NFL team which plays its home games in a domed stadium has ever won a Super bowl.
  2. The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League all-stars Game.
  3. What occurs more often in December than any other month? A. Conception.

My thanks again for dropping in and for all your support.. see you again I hope.. thanks Sally

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in this case – How to be a Know it All – Part Two

Welcome to part two of how to become a Know it All and win a pub quiz……

1. No NFL team which plays its home games in a domed stadium has ever won a Super bowl.
2. The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League all-stars Game.
3. What occurs more often in December than any other month? A. Conception.
4. What separates “60 Minutes,” on CBS from every other TV show? A. No theme song
5. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what? A. Their birthplace.
6. Most boat owners name their own boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? A. Obsession
7. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter “A”? A. One thousand
8. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common? A. All invented by women.
9. What is the only food that doesn’t spoil? A. Honey
10. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year? A. Father’s Day
11. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic? A. He was allergic to carrots.
12. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party? A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.
13. In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase “goodnight, sleep tight”.
14. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride’s father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month or what we know today as the honeymoon.
15. In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It’s where we get the phrase “mind your P’s and Q’s”
16. Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. “Wet your whistle” is the phrase inspired by this practice.
17. In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden….and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
18. During the time of Peter the Great, any Russian man who wore a beard was required to pay a special tax.
19. In the city of Washington D.C., no building may be higher than the Washington Monument.
20. The Bactrian camel is the only land mammal that can survive on salt water.
21. The Great Wall of China is the largest construction project ever undertaken by man, and its stones could build an 8-foot wall around the world at the equator.
22. A recent study conducted by the Shyness Clinic in Mento Park, CA, revealed that almost 90% of Americans consider themselves shy.
23. You’re just as likely to die by falling out of bed as you are to get struck by lightning: each is a 1 in 2,000,000 chance.
24. The Capitol Building in Washington, D.C. has 365 steps representing every day of the year.
25. A whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
26. In the 10th century, the Grand Vizier of Persia took his 117, 000-volume library with him everywhere. Camels trained to walk in alphabetical order carried it.
27. The first successful parachute jump to be made from a moving airplane was made by Captain Berry at St. Louis, MO, in 1912.
28. New freckles generally stop appearing after age 19 or 20.
29. There are no clocks in Las Vegas casinos.
30. Elephants are the only animals with four knees.
31. There are three completely different versions of the Mona Lisa under the final portrait, all painted by da Vinci, as revealed by X-rays.
32. A “Funambulist” is a tightrope walker.
33. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, by Mark Twain, was the first novel ever to be written on a typewriter.
34. Dueling in Paraguay is legal as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
35. The Navajo Indian language was used successfully as a code by the U.S. in WWII.
36. The only survivor of Custer’s Last Stand was his horse, Commanche.
37. Bamboo can grow 4 feet in 24 hours.
38. Hollywood actress Joan Crawford had her back teeth removed to make her cheekbones more prominent.
39. Generally, right-handed archers shoot arrows that turn clockwise. Left-hander’s arrows turn counterclockwise.
40. Mosquito repellents don’t repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito’s sensors so they don’t know you’re there.
41. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.
42. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.
43. No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.
44. Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
45. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
46. Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.
47. The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley’s gum.
48. The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.
49. A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother’s first flight.
50. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating 1 olive from each salad served in first-class.

I hope you have discovered a few facts (all true of course!)  thanks Sally

Smorgasbord Laughter Lines – Or in this case – Be a Know it All – Weird facts Part One

A re-run of some of the weird facts and statistics that almost seem unbelievable!!! But they might help you win that pub quiz.

  1. Mosquitoes are attracted to the color blue twice as much as to any other color.
  2. If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
  3. Every night, wasps bite into the stem of a plant, lock their mandibles (jaws) into position, stretch out at right angles to the stem, and, with legs dangling, fall asleep.
  4. WEIRD LAWS During the time of Peter the Great, any Russian man who wore a beard was required to pay a special tax.
  5. It is illegal to hunt camels in the state of Arizona.
  6. In the country of Turkey, in the 16th and 17th centuries, anyone caught drinking coffee was put to death.
  7. A Virginia law requires all bathtubs to be kept out in the yards, not inside the houses.
  8. There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos
  9. The opposite sides of a dice cube always add up to seven
  10. The human tongue tastes bitter things with the taste buds toward the back. Salty and pungent flavors are tasted in the middle of the tongue, sweet flavors at the tip.
  11. It is impossible to sneeze and keep one’s eyes open at the same time
  12. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continually from the bottom of the glass to the top.
  13. Yes, it’s against the law to: Doze off under a hair dryer in Florida Slap an old friend on the back in Georgia, and Play hopscotch on a Sunday in Missouri.
  14. The first disc brake appeared in 1902, though it could hardly be described as practical. Widespread interest in automotive disc brakes didn’t come about until the 1950s when Jaguar used them to devastating effect at Le Mans. In the 1953 “24-Hour”, Jaguar C-Types – fitted with discs developed by Dunlop – finished first, second and fourth
  15. There is more lemon in Lemon Pledge furniture polish than in Country Time Lemonade.
  16. More people worry about cleaning the house before a party (56.2 percent) than about the food (42.9 percent).
  17. Of all of the cola sold in the United States, 12 percent is consumed with or instead of breakfast.
  18. Licking a regular-sized, multi-colour stamp delivers 0.007 calories. A larger commemorative stamp has 0.014 calories.
  19. In three years, Campbell Soup Co. makes more pasta stars than there are in the Milky Way
  20. It takes 300 gallons of water to grow one pound of rice
  21. Coca-Cola was originally green.
  22. Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than for the US Treasury
  23. Smartest dogs: 1)border collie; 2)poodle; 3)golden retriever Dumbest: afghan
  24. Hawaiian alphabet has 12 letters
  25. Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear better
  26. Chances that an American lives within 50 miles of where he/she grew up: 1 in 2
  27. Amount American Airlines saved in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served first class: $40,000
  28. City with the most Rolls Royce’s per capita: Hong Kong
  29. State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
  30. Chances of a white Christmas in New York: 1 in 4 (although I can’t remember when it happened last!)
  31. Estimated percentage of American adults who go on a diet each year: 44
  32. Barbie’s measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33
  33. City with the highest per capita viewer ship of TV evangelists: Wash., DC
  34. Percentage of American men who say they would marry the same woman if they had it to do all over again: 80 . Percentage of American women who say they would marry the same man: 50
  35. Percentage of men who say they are happier after their divorce or separation: 58 .
  36. Percentage of women who say they are happier: 85
  37. Cost of raising a medium-sized dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
  38. Percentage of Americans who have visited Disneyland or Disney World: 70.
  39. Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.
  40. Portion of ice cream sold that is vanilla: 1/3
  41. Portion of potatoes sold that are French-fried: 1/3
  42. Percentage of bird species that are monogamous: 90
  43. Portion of Harvard students who graduate with honors: 4/5
  44. Chances that a burglary in the US will be solved: 1 in 7
  45. Portion of land in the US owned by the government: 1/3
  46. Only food that does not spoil: honey
  47. Only bird that can fly backwards: Hummingbird
  48. Only continent without reptiles or snakes: Antarctica
  49.  Only animal besides human that can get sunburn: Pig
  50. Ostriches stick their heads in the sand to look for water
  51. In the Caribbean there are oysters that can climb trees

I hope that is upped your General Knowledge score.. thanks for popping in … more coming up.. Sally